Jump to content
IGNORED

The Definitive &#(@%ing Cursing/Swearing/Cussing/Profanity Thread


iacas
Note:Β This thread is 2205 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic.Β Thank you!

Recommended Posts

Funny stuff, this thread.Β  Here's an idea.Β  Why not have a topic category that allows swearing. Maybe have an agreement of terms box you have to check so you know what to expect. Then let people go off on bad shots, bad breaks and golf idiots that seem to turn up all too often.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


When I play golf I do the good old Tiger Woods, let the club drop behind me and cuss at myself in 3rd person.Β  So a bad shot goes something like this for me:

*Slices the driver 260 yards into the trees* Club drops behind me* I say to myselfΒ "Nice shot DarronΒ you f****** idiot" *Pick up my club* Head to the cart *Find my ball* Repeat process 4 times (or more)*

I threw a club 1 time the first time I was out (some old rented junkers) it hit a tree and itΒ came back at me quickly, wont do that again.

My favorite form of stress relief is on one of my home courses there is a giant field next to one of the holes so if I am playing poorly at that point I grab a crappy ball from my bag and hit it as farΒ and as hard asΒ I can into the field,it makes me feel better lol.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


When I play golf I do the good old Tiger Woods, let the club drop behind me and cuss at myself in 3rd person.Β  So a bad shot goes something like this for me:

*Slices the driver 260 yards into the trees* Club drops behind me* I say to myselfΒ "Nice shot DarronΒ you f****** idiot" *Pick up my club* Head to the cart *Find my ball* Repeat process 4 times (or more)*

I threw a club 1 time the first time I was out (some old rented junkers) it hit a tree and itΒ came back at me quickly, wont do that again.

My favorite form of stress relief is on one of my home courses there is a giant field next to one of the holes so if I am playing poorly at that point I grab a crappy ball from my bag and hit it as farΒ and as hard asΒ I can into the field,it makes me feel better lol.

Lol, if your like me you hit a slice into the trees then hit your crappy ball straight as an arrow into the field.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


Swearing and getting upset on the course is a serious issue for me. I gave up the game for over 3 years(although I did play 4 or 5 times, but used to play 2-3 rds a week), because of these issues. I have a temper problem and it has also caused me to be fired from more than one job over the years. I have taken meds, went to anger management and although I[m getting better in my 40s its still a issue for me in Golf and everyday life....

. As another poster stated, I can't believe how calm 99 percent of golfer are. Its funny, one of the best golfers of all time, TW gets moreΒ upset than almost anyone(but I have noticed since last year he is a lot calmer on bad shots). I can't stand these no personality PGA tour players like: Duffner, KuchnerΒ and several other's. I like guys like-Will Mackinzie, Henrik Stenson(yes he has some personality) and several other's. I don't know what it is about Duffner, but I cannot stand that dude! Plus he went to Awwwburn!

Link to comment
Share on other sites


It's funny how much we expect of ourselves, even as beginners. I used to cuss really bad, even broke a few clubs (not proud of). Luckily I have calmed down a lot since. I play a lot with my two sons who unfortunately have inherited my intensity. I am trying hard to teach them about staying level and how getting pissed only ruins the next few shots or round. It's an up hill battle.

Every once in a while someone we are playing with will cuss and apologize for it around my boys. I just tell them "It's ok, they hear worse in school. All we can do is teach them timing." :-D

Link to comment
Share on other sites


I will let out some serious cuss yells but usually only if I make the same mistake, like hit it fat the 2nd or 3rd or 4th time that round. That p**ses me off like nothing else. I find letting it out helps clear the mind, at least that's what I tell people during my apology. I know if I've hit a great shot cuz one of my playing partners (a 70-yr old guy) calls me a c***su***r. Every time, and he's from SC so the way he says it is frickin hilarious.

In my Bag: Driver: Titelist 913 D3 9.5 deg. 3W: TaylorMade RBZ 14.5 3H: TaylorMade RBZ 18.5 4I - SW: TaylorMade R7 TP LW: Titelist Vokey 60 Putter: Odyssey 2-Ball

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awards, Achievements, and Accolades

Favourites:

"JESUS F*CKING CHRIST"

"That was piss and sh*t" - Spartacus Reference

"PERFECT!!!!..........example of a f*cking terrible golf shot"

"Once again the golf gods ram cock in f*cking ass" - Spartacus Reference

:tmade:Β SLDR X-Stiff 12.5Β°
:nike:VRS Covert 3 Wood Stiff
:nike:VRS Covert 3 Hybrid Stiff
:nike:VR Pro Combo CB 4 - PW Stiff 2Β° Flat
:cleveland:588RTX CB 50.10 GW
:cleveland:588RTX CB 54.10 SW
:nike:VR V-Rev 60.8 LW
:nike:Method 002 Putter

Link to comment
Share on other sites


I'm not much for out loud "serious" displays of anger, but I do like to curse sometimes in a more humorous way.Β  It's therapeutic.

I like to treat my ball as an animate object and I call it names when it goes bad places.Β  Usually mother effer, sometimes a-hole, and also various derogatory names for homosexuals.Β  (I know thoseΒ areΒ un-kosher, but like I said, it's not loud, it's just between me and my ball, so I don't think it should offend anybody.Β  Except my ball ... I hope he gets offended, the little pr*ck!!!)

  • Upvote 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awards, Achievements, and Accolades

Lol, if your like me you hit a slice into the trees then hit your crappy ball straight as an arrow into the field.

That is usually what happens. I think I have hit 2 of my longest drives ever into that field.

Link to comment
Share on other sites


Yesterday I cursed twice. Β It was barely an audible whisper, but it was a curse. Β Both times were as a result of receiving an email from a co-worker, and my response was "are you f**kin serious?"

Brandon a.k.a. Tony Stark

-------------------------

The Fastest Flip in the West

Link to comment
Share on other sites


I was practicing in the basement last night - cursing violently at my god damn f*cking sh!t takeaway,

:tmade:Β SLDR X-Stiff 12.5Β°
:nike:VRS Covert 3 Wood Stiff
:nike:VRS Covert 3 Hybrid Stiff
:nike:VR Pro Combo CB 4 - PW Stiff 2Β° Flat
:cleveland:588RTX CB 50.10 GW
:cleveland:588RTX CB 54.10 SW
:nike:VR V-Rev 60.8 LW
:nike:Method 002 Putter

Link to comment
Share on other sites


  • 2 weeks later...
  • Administrator

F*CK YEAH!

And… stolen.

Erik J. Barzeski β€” β›³Β I knock a ball. It goes in a gopher hole. πŸŒπŸΌβ€β™‚οΈ
Director of InstructionΒ Golf EvolutionΒ β€’Β Owner,Β The Sand Trap .comΒ β€’Β Author,Β Lowest Score Wins
Golf DigestΒ "Best Young Teachers in America" 2016-17Β &Β "Best in State" 2017-20Β β€’ WNY Section PGA Teacher of the Year 2019Β :edel:Β :true_linkswear:

Check Out:Β New TopicsΒ |Β TST BlogΒ |Β Golf TermsΒ |Β Instructional ContentΒ |Β AnalyzrΒ |Β LSWΒ | Instructional Droplets

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awards, Achievements, and Accolades

  • 6 months later...

Well I thought I would revive this old thread with a quote from Shorty.... :-P (not directed at Shorty, just using a point he made)

Originally Posted byΒ Shorty

Heterosexuals don't get to decide what offends the gay community. That's not political correctness. That's arrogance and ignorance of the worst type.

Who gets to decide who is offended by curse words???

Lets say some are (religious groups perhaps).. Β Would it be arrogance and ignorance to continue to use curse words even if they are offended??

(ok, so I am little bored at work this afternoon)

-Matt-

"does it still count as a hit fairway if it is the next one over"

DRIVER-Callaway FTiz__3 WOOD-Nike SQ Dymo 15__HYBRIDS-3,4,5 Adams__IRONS-6-PW Adams__WEDGES-50,55,60 Wilson Harmonized__PUTTER-Odyssey Dual Force Rossie II

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awards, Achievements, and Accolades

The fewer people around, the louder I curse. Thinking about it when I'm calm, it's actually kind of funny. I'll have rounds where I think I'm all alone and completely cut loose. Then I'll run into someone on the back nine, join him and become a regular golf-playing angel for a few holes.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awards, Achievements, and Accolades

Here in Michigan a few years back on July 4th.Β Β  There was a guy that fell off of a raft on the Rifle River and cussed up a storm.

The story, which made headlines in 1999, began when Timothy J. Boomer, while on a canoe outing with friends, fell into the frigid waters of the Rifle River and unleashed an emphatic stream of profanities.

Perhaps the story could have stopped right there, had Mr. Boomer, then 25, had access to some of Mr. O'Connor's advice.

Find an alternative for an outburst of emotion, like Shucks! Gadzooks! Or Freaking. ''If you are looking for a substitute for every specific curse word you use . . . pick words that sound similar.'' Shoot! is ''a logical substitute because it is a mere vowel away from what really wants to be said.''

But Mr. Boomer's luck grew worse. A police officer in earshot of the vulgarities ticketed him for violating a 1897 law banning ''indecent, immoral, obscene, vulgar or insulting language'' in the presence of women or children.

Mr. O'Connor adds a few more to the list, warning: ''It's unwise to swear at your mother, your employer, the person you sleep with on a regular basis and anyone who appears to be heavily armed.''

During the court proceedings, a woman testified that Mr. Boomer's fiery words where loud enough to make her ears burn at 40 yards and that she had to cover her toddler's ears.

If you have penchant for profanity and you are unsure it offends people, ask them, says Mr. O'Connor.Β  (ya right!)

Mr. Boomer's defense invoked the First Amendment right to freedom of speech. Prosecutors countered that his oaths did not constitute speech because they were not clear thoughts.

Although freedom of speech is protected by the Constitution, Mr. O'Connor says, ''Claiming our verbal privileges as American citizens is often nothing more than an excuse to be lazy about how we speak.''

The court found Mr. Boomer guilty, fining him $75 and requiring him to perform four days of community service. He appealed, and his luck finally turned. Last week's decision said the law was unconstitutionally vague.

Mr. Boomer's sentence was overturned, ending the battle of the bad words. But swearing has hardly been vindicated. As Mr. O'Connor writes:

''The vocal energy needed to mumble single-syllable, four letter words is equal to the energy needed to drool.''

From the land of perpetual cloudiness.Β Β  I'm Denny

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awards, Achievements, and Accolades

  • 3 years later...
  • Administrator
On 3/27/2013 at 1:59 PM, iacas said:

Β 

Β 

Just a reminder: swearing can be fun.

:-)

And no, this is not prompted byΒ anything.

Β 

Β 

Β 

Β 

Β 

Bullshit.

  • Like 1

Erik J. Barzeski β€” β›³Β I knock a ball. It goes in a gopher hole. πŸŒπŸΌβ€β™‚οΈ
Director of InstructionΒ Golf EvolutionΒ β€’Β Owner,Β The Sand Trap .comΒ β€’Β Author,Β Lowest Score Wins
Golf DigestΒ "Best Young Teachers in America" 2016-17Β &Β "Best in State" 2017-20Β β€’ WNY Section PGA Teacher of the Year 2019Β :edel:Β :true_linkswear:

Check Out:Β New TopicsΒ |Β TST BlogΒ |Β Golf TermsΒ |Β Instructional ContentΒ |Β AnalyzrΒ |Β LSWΒ | Instructional Droplets

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Awards, Achievements, and Accolades

Note:Β This thread is 2205 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic.Β Thank you!

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


Γ—
Γ—
  • Create New...

Important Information

Welcome to TST! Signing up is free, and you'll see fewer ads and can talk with fellow golf enthusiasts! By using TST, you agree to our Terms of Use, our Privacy Policy, and our Guidelines.

The popup will be closed in 10 seconds...