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Jeremie Boop

How do you handle false accusations

48 posts in this topic

Copied from the "what'd you shoot thread" about my 9 hole league game last night:

53 last night in league. Was having a little trouble to start then just missed an up and down save for par on the 4th after putting it 15 ft from the cup after a drop. Carded a 5 only to have my opponent say "I had you at 7". I said "how's that" I hit one, dropped two, hit 3 on the green and 2 putted for 5. He said, whatever if you said you got five then fine..... I never short any strokes on my scores and NEVER improve my lie like those guys do all the time and he wanted to try to argue my score. That was in my head the rest of the time and I couldn't recover.

So, my question to you all is, how would you handle this situation. I confirmed with my dad what my score was because the guy had me questioning my count. Either way, I am able to get over a bad hit/hole whatever pretty easily at this point, but being called a liar about my score by someone who takes drops 30+ yards from where his ball went OB and improves his lie on just about every shot had me pretty annoyed. So much that every shot I just wanted to hit it perfect and score well just to prove something. Problem is the opposite happened.

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Ask him how he counted. Make him go through the shots. Then from now on, call him out on his BS.

I'll typically ignore "convenient" drops if it's a casual round, or some fluffing of the ball or whatever...don't really care. But if someone tries to bullshit me, I'm calling them on EVERYTHING. That ball better not move. Hit it near OB? If you can't find it...better go back and re-tee...

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Originally Posted by Jeremie Boop

Copied from the "what'd you shoot thread" about my 9 hole league game last night:

53 last night in league. Was having a little trouble to start then just missed an up and down save for par on the 4th after putting it 15 ft from the cup after a drop. Carded a 5 only to have my opponent say "I had you at 7". I said "how's that" I hit one, dropped two, hit 3 on the green and 2 putted for 5. He said, whatever if you said you got five then fine..... I never short any strokes on my scores and NEVER improve my lie like those guys do all the time and he wanted to try to argue my score. That was in my head the rest of the time and I couldn't recover.

So, my question to you all is, how would you handle this situation. I confirmed with my dad what my score was because the guy had me questioning my count. Either way, I am able to get over a bad hit/hole whatever pretty easily at this point, but being called a liar about my score by someone who takes drops 30+ yards from where his ball went OB and improves his lie on just about every shot had me pretty annoyed. So much that every shot I just wanted to hit it perfect and score well just to prove something. Problem is the opposite happened.

Doesn't sound like an "accusation" so much as asking for clarification.

In a league or tournament each competitor has the responsibility to protect the field by confirming the validity of play/score of their fellow competitors.  If he genuinely thought you may have hit a 2d ball out, he was absolutely right to ask for clarification.  You should do the same thing under similar circumstances.

As to what you do......you do exactly what you did.  You recite your shots and count for him and everyone moves on.  Don't let something like that get in your head.

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Originally Posted by David in FL

Doesn't sound like an "accusation" so much as asking for clarification.

In a league, or tournament each competitor has the responsibility to protect the field by confirming the validity of play/score of their fellow competitors.  If he genuinely thought you may have hit a 2d ball out, he was absolutely right to ask for clarification.  You should do the same thing under similar circumstances.

As to what you do......you do exactly what you did.  You recite your shots and count for him and everyone moves on.  Don't let something like that get in your head.

" He said, whatever if you said you got five then fine"

Up until this part, I agree with you. If he said the quoted part, that's a smartass way of calling someone a cheat or a liar. I'd have HIM recite your shots and see where the discrepancy is.

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Originally Posted by Slice of Life

Ask him how he counted. Make him go through the shots. Then from now on, call him out on his BS.

I'll typically ignore "convenient" drops if it's a casual round, or some fluffing of the ball or whatever...don't really care. But if someone tries to bullshit me, I'm calling them on EVERYTHING. That ball better not move. Hit it near OB? If you can't find it...better go back and re-tee...

I tried to get him to tell me how he got that, somehow he had me on the green in 5.... I can't get too much of an attitude with the people in the league because my dad is friends with almost every one of them. I need to just stop caring how I do in this league, it's just a joke. They don't like for you to play a provisional if you may have lost a ball but they want to roll their ball around, pick it up and "tee it up" on the rough, move it out from under a tree, take drops in the fairway.... I just can't do it because I'm competitive by nature and want to beat them while still playing by the rules. They are forever telling me "don't play it from there, move it out here" and I say "no thanks, I'll play it how it lies." If it wasn't for my dad being my partner I wouldn't even play this league but I rarely get to spend time with him so what can I do.

Originally Posted by David in FL

Doesn't sound like an "accusation" so much as asking for clarification.

In a league or tournament each competitor has the responsibility to protect the field by confirming the validity of play/score of their fellow competitors.  If he genuinely thought you may have hit a 2d ball out, he was absolutely right to ask for clarification.  You should do the same thing under similar circumstances.

As to what you do......you do exactly what you did.  You recite your shots and count for him and everyone moves on.  Don't let something like that get in your head.

The problem is, it's hard to convey the tone he used when he said "I had you at 7" and the look on his face when I recounted my strokes to confirm my 5.

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Originally Posted by Jeremie Boop

I tried to get him to tell me how he got that, somehow he had me on the green in 5.... I can't get too much of an attitude with the people in the league because my dad is friends with almost every one of them. I need to just stop caring how I do in this league, it's just a joke. They don't like for you to play a provisional if you may have lost a ball but they want to roll their ball around, pick it up and "tee it up" on the rough, move it out from under a tree, take drops in the fairway.... I just can't do it because I'm competitive by nature and want to beat them while still playing by the rules. They are forever telling me "don't play it from there, move it out here" and I say "no thanks, I'll play it how it lies." If it wasn't for my dad being my partner I wouldn't even play this league but I rarely get to spend time with him so what can I do.

Based on that, I wouldn't even pay attention to anyone in the league except your Dad. Be cordial, but just pretend like they don't matter/exist. Go there to spend some time with Dad, have some fun, and work on your game. Doesn't matter what the other guys are doing, if you do THAT...you'll beat them without even trying.

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You should watch each one of my strokes next time, it's really quite a show.

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" He said, whatever if you said you got five then fine" Up until this part, I agree with you. If he said the quoted part, that's a smartass way of calling someone a cheat or a liar. I'd have HIM recite your shots and see where the discrepancy is.

If after you recite your shots, he still disagrees, you'll want to ask him where he thinks the discrepancy lies and work through it with him. In tournaments and league play, you'll find varying amounts of "gamesmanship" going on. Thats why my last sentence is the most important. ;-)

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Besides your Dad, was there a 4th in the group?  I would have gotten them all off to the side and said "Ok, let's go over my shots on this hole right now before we go any farther"...trying my best not to be a smartass myself.  Ask everyone in the group what they think you had and explain how it got there, one off the tee, drop, 3rd on green, putt, putt, or whatever.  But, I would not be able to let it go with the comment the other guy made but I would get it out in the open and over with before the next hole.  Yes, I may still be POd but at least it would be resolved.

What you don't want to happen is to get inside afterwards and have same guy telling everyone else you had a 7.  If for nothing else, because you say your Dad is friends with all of these folks in the league.  You don't want your Dad having to defend you after the fact.  Resolve it at the point it happens.

Oh, and about the rolling it around, moving the ball or whatever...if the entire league does it and it is common knowledge...so be it.  If some do and some don't and they say they are playing by the rules, then you call it on them.  If you are playing just for fun and everyone but you is rolling it around, your choice to whether you do or not.  Typically, I would not, unless it was a case where I was up against a root of something.  If I am playing for nothing, I will move it.  If really playing for something, then I play it down or take unplayable...but I expect everyone else to be doing the same.

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Originally Posted by Slice of Life

Based on that, I wouldn't even pay attention to anyone in the league except your Dad. Be cordial, but just pretend like they don't matter/exist. Go there to spend some time with Dad, have some fun, and work on your game. Doesn't matter what the other guys are doing, if you do THAT...you'll beat them without even trying.

Yeah, I try to do it that way most times. A lot of the guys are great guys though, even though the cheat a lot playing "winter rules" or dropping on the side of the water after putting it in. If I can get over my competitiveness I'd be better off.

Originally Posted by RickK

Besides your Dad, was there a 4th in the group?  I would have gotten them all off to the side and said "Ok, let's go over my shots on this hole right now before we go any farther"...trying my best not to be a smartass myself.  Ask everyone in the group what they think you had and explain how it got there, one off the tee, drop, 3rd on green, putt, putt, or whatever.  But, I would not be able to let it go with the comment the other guy made but I would get it out in the open and over with before the next hole.  Yes, I may still be POd but at least it would be resolved.

What you don't want to happen is to get inside afterwards and have same guy telling everyone else you had a 7.  Resolve it at the point it happens.

There was a 4th, it's 2v2 based on handicap. The 4th guy didn't even seem to register the conversation as he is just there to play golf and drink beer. I doubt he'd get anywhere trying to tell everyone that I cheated being that they see me play shots from lies that they'd move their ball from. I just hate being called a cheater, hell if I cheated my hc would be much better than it is rofl.

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It happens, the guy was probably trying to see if you were not paying attention to your own score.

you did the right thing, you counted your shots, and he backed off because he knew he was BSing you. I wouldn't get to upset over it. If he can't count the shots you took, then he wasn't paying attention.

I play with a guy who is a known stroke shaver, you have to keep track of what he puts down. He will forget he put a ball in the water, its crazy. Most of the time, someone else handles the scorecard than him.

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Originally Posted by saevel25

It happens, the guy was probably trying to see if you were not paying attention to your own score.

you did the right thing, you counted your shots, and he backed off because he knew he was BSing you. I wouldn't get to upset over it. If he can't count the shots you took, then he wasn't paying attention.

I play with a guy who is a known stroke shaver, you have to keep track of what he puts down. He will forget he put a ball in the water, its crazy. Most of the time, someone else handles the scorecard than him.

I should have figured he didn't do a good job keeping track because they had the card and gave it to us for scoring purposes. I don't know why, but I can handle being called just about anything but a cheater.

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Originally Posted by Jeremie Boop

I tried to get him to tell me how he got that, somehow he had me on the green in 5....

That's the entire crux of it though. There shouldn't be a "somehow" about it. Make him count the shots.

Problem solved.

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i feel your pain... had to deal with this at a 4 man scramble tournament with my uncle. Its a large group of professionals, they accused us of cheating when we turned our scores in last year. Their defense was that it was impossible to read the greens that day. So this year i asked the guy running the tournament again to put us in front of them so they can watch the show
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Originally Posted by iacas

That's the entire crux of it though. There shouldn't be a "somehow" about it. Make him count the shots.

Problem solved.

That's the thing, when he said "5 on" I said "how did you get that? I dropped 2 and hit 3 on" then he just mumbled something and walked away. I recounted my strokes for him, he mumbled something again then said what he said about whatever you got 5 then. Like I said, it's more about people who don't play by the rules having the nerve to try to call me a liar/cheat.

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That's total b.s.

As stated, if he had you at 7, then he should explain why. You asked him to, and his reply is 'whatever'...?

Heh, you shoulda had him write down 'whatever' for your score on that hole, since that seemed to be his justification.

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Originally Posted by Jeremie Boop

That's the thing, when he said "5 on" I said "how did you get that? I dropped 2 and hit 3 on" then he just mumbled something and walked away. I recounted my strokes for him, he mumbled something again then said what he said about whatever you got 5 then. Like I said, it's more about people who don't play by the rules having the nerve to try to call me a liar/cheat.

Say, I had you at 9. Then when he flips out mumble and walkaway.

Not the mature thing to do, but more fun and rewarding...lol

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Originally Posted by Slice of Life

Say, I had you at 9. Then when he flips out mumble and walkaway.

Not the mature thing to do, but more fun and rewarding...lol

Haha, he had an 8 *double par max in league* so it didn't matter.

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