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The Definitive &#(@%ing Cursing/Swearing/Cussing/Profanity Thread - Page 10

post #163 of 175

Funny stuff, this thread.  Here's an idea.  Why not have a topic category that allows swearing. Maybe have an agreement of terms box you have to check so you know what to expect. Then let people go off on bad shots, bad breaks and golf idiots that seem to turn up all too often.

post #164 of 175

When I play golf I do the good old Tiger Woods, let the club drop behind me and cuss at myself in 3rd person.  So a bad shot goes something like this for me:

*Slices the driver 260 yards into the trees* Club drops behind me* I say to myself "Nice shot Darron you f****** idiot" *Pick up my club* Head to the cart *Find my ball* Repeat process 4 times (or more)*

I threw a club 1 time the first time I was out (some old rented junkers) it hit a tree and it came back at me quickly, wont do that again.

My favorite form of stress relief is on one of my home courses there is a giant field next to one of the holes so if I am playing poorly at that point I grab a crappy ball from my bag and hit it as far and as hard as I can into the field,it makes me feel better lol.

post #165 of 175
Quote:
Originally Posted by dhicks33 View Post
 

When I play golf I do the good old Tiger Woods, let the club drop behind me and cuss at myself in 3rd person.  So a bad shot goes something like this for me:

*Slices the driver 260 yards into the trees* Club drops behind me* I say to myself "Nice shot Darron you f****** idiot" *Pick up my club* Head to the cart *Find my ball* Repeat process 4 times (or more)*

I threw a club 1 time the first time I was out (some old rented junkers) it hit a tree and it came back at me quickly, wont do that again.

My favorite form of stress relief is on one of my home courses there is a giant field next to one of the holes so if I am playing poorly at that point I grab a crappy ball from my bag and hit it as far and as hard as I can into the field,it makes me feel better lol.

Lol, if your like me you hit a slice into the trees then hit your crappy ball straight as an arrow into the field.

post #166 of 175

Swearing and getting upset on the course is a serious issue for me. I gave up the game for over 3 years(although I did play 4 or 5 times, but used to play 2-3 rds a week), because of these issues. I have a temper problem and it has also caused me to be fired from more than one job over the years. I have taken meds, went to anger management and although I[m getting better in my 40s its still a issue for me in Golf and everyday life....

 

. As another poster stated, I can't believe how calm 99 percent of golfer are. Its funny, one of the best golfers of all time, TW gets more upset than almost anyone(but I have noticed since last year he is a lot calmer on bad shots). I can't stand these no personality PGA tour players like: Duffner, Kuchner and several other's. I like guys like-Will Mackinzie, Henrik Stenson(yes he has some personality) and several other's. I don't know what it is about Duffner, but I cannot stand that dude! Plus he went to Awwwburn!

post #167 of 175

It's funny how much we expect of ourselves, even as beginners. I used to cuss really bad, even broke a few clubs (not proud of). Luckily I have calmed down a lot since. I play a lot with my two sons who unfortunately have inherited my intensity. I am trying hard to teach them about staying level and how getting pissed only ruins the next few shots or round. It's an up hill battle.

 

Every once in a while someone we are playing with will cuss and apologize for it around my boys. I just tell them "It's ok, they hear worse in school. All we can do is teach them timing."  :-D

post #168 of 175
I will let out some serious cuss yells but usually only if I make the same mistake, like hit it fat the 2nd or 3rd or 4th time that round. That p**ses me off like nothing else. I find letting it out helps clear the mind, at least that's what I tell people during my apology.

I know if I've hit a great shot cuz one of my playing partners (a 70-yr old guy) calls me a c***su***r. Every time, and he's from SC so the way he says it is frickin hilarious.
post #169 of 175

Favourites:

 

 

"JESUS F*CKING CHRIST"

"That was piss and sh*t" - Spartacus Reference

"PERFECT!!!!..........example of a f*cking terrible golf shot"

"Once again the golf gods ram cock in f*cking ass" - Spartacus Reference

post #170 of 175

I'm not much for out loud "serious" displays of anger, but I do like to curse sometimes in a more humorous way.  It's therapeutic.

 

I like to treat my ball as an animate object and I call it names when it goes bad places.  Usually mother effer, sometimes a-hole, and also various derogatory names for homosexuals.  (I know those are un-kosher, but like I said, it's not loud, it's just between me and my ball, so I don't think it should offend anybody.  Except my ball ... I hope he gets offended, the little pr*ck!!!)

post #171 of 175
Quote:
Originally Posted by Strausy007 View Post
 

Lol, if your like me you hit a slice into the trees then hit your crappy ball straight as an arrow into the field.

That is usually what happens. I think I have hit 2 of my longest drives ever into that field.

post #172 of 175

Yesterday I cursed twice.  It was barely an audible whisper, but it was a curse.  Both times were as a result of receiving an email from a co-worker, and my response was "are you f**kin serious?"

post #173 of 175

I was practicing in the basement last night - cursing violently at my god damn f*cking sh!t takeaway,

post #174 of 175

F*CK YEAH! ;-)

 

post #175 of 175
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mvmac View Post
 

F*CK YEAH! ;-)

 

And… stolen.

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