Most, not everyone will hopefully be able to identify with this.....most regular golfing groups of buddies have "that" guy. Maybe you have been that guy at one point or another. I know I was for a while. That guy or that friend is the one in the group that you know could play so much better if they would just do this one or these few things. You've tried talking to him/her and letting them know that they would be so much better if they just changed this, or that.
It's difficult because unless you are actually a golf instructor, you don't want to sound like that to your friend. Besides, what gives you the right to tell someone what they should or shouldn't do in their swing. But after seeing the same swing thousands of times now and witnessing the same results, you know that you are right, that if xxxx would just try this one simple thing that it would make such a big difference.
It can be a fine line on what to say or what not to say. This person is your friend and you don't like seeing them in a slump and not playing the quality of golf that they are capable of. At the same time though, the slump is deep and this has been festering for a while. You can sense the anger coming from your friend and decide not to say anything.
At first it was just a few bad holes which turned into a few bad rounds. At this point the excuses are coming out all the time. You laugh under your breath at them because you know the truth. Those bad rounds compound and all of a sudden, the slump that your friend is in is slowly starting to have an impact on your game. You find that you are being impacted because it is taking so long for your friend to find his ball in the woods, hole after hole. You think about saying something, afterall, you know that if they just did a few things different then everyone would be happy as your friend would be playing better and it would not have an impact on your game.
Things get worse and after a while the tantrums become too frequent. You find that your own game is becoming more and more impacted. Do you say something finally? It's not that easy though, maybe your wives are best friends or your kids are friends. If you say something and it does not go as well as it should, there could be serious collateral damage. Is that worth it? You start to think that it's yourself that is being selfish and you don't say anything. The whole time it gets worse and worse.
I could go on from here but I think everyone sees the point or knows someone like this to varying degrees. It's a shame but I am kind of going through the same thing with a friend in my group. I was for the longest time putting off and dreading saying something to my friend and was going to last week. Before I could say anything though, my friend who has been in this terrible slump for so long made it easy by leaving the club. I don't want him to leave but it may be for the best for now anyway. It's hard to tell someone that does not hit any balls during the week that they cannot expect to improve much from just playing 2 rounds on the weekend and hitting balls before a round for 5 minutes.
I feel bad in a way, because compounding the issue of his slump is the fact that I hit balls 2 to 3 times a week and have been fortunate to improve a lot just this year alone. Nothing has been said but I wonder if my progress makes my friend feel worse that he is regressing? I hope that's not the case but I cannot help but wonder. I'm not sure what else I can do. I've tried to be helpful but no matter who says something or provides a tip, nothing ever changes.
I guess I'm fortunate though because I have no kids and no wife. I could not imagine what it would be like if that was a factor, or even if there were work relationships involved. Then it made me think....I went through my own on the course issues last winter and into the early spring where I felt I was not improving. Was I that guy? Were my friends ever embarassed by my behavior on the course?