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Cheating playing partner

post #1 of 18
Thread Starter 
I'm sure this has been brought up before, but a friend and coworker that I play golf with almost on a weekly basis is a cheater. Yesterday I counted three strokes on the first two holes that he didn't record. Drive not where he wanted it on the fairway, tees up another ball. Lost ball or in the water, drops without penalty. Hits a chip fat or thin, drops another ball and picks up his first without penalty. Ball under a tree, shoe wedge , with no penalties. Conveniently forgets to count strokes. On and on.

My grandfather taught me the game of golf with a pretty strict adherence to the rules. I was also a member of a country club, which for my time there further set in stone that you don't cheat at the game of golf. I believe that golf mirrors life, and if you are willing to lie and cheat at golf, they you are willing to lie and cheat in other areas. I want to talk with him about it, but don't want to come across as uptight as he may not see the game as seriously as I do.

Oh, btw he "beat" me by two strokes yesterday....
post #2 of 18
This is almost more of a relationship issue than a golf issue.

A guy I used to play with all the time cheats and is very defensive when called on it. He's also quick to call various other people cheats, including Dustin Johnson after a certain incident at a certain major.

My solution has been to stop playing with him (and largely to stop hanging out with him, although other reasons went into that).
post #3 of 18

You really got to get on them right from the beginning so they don't take offense from it when you do later. Place a little bet at the beginning of the round so that you have some incentive to keep him from cheating.

 

Bring it up lightheartedly. 

post #4 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shindig View Post

This is almost more of a relationship issue than a golf issue.

A guy I used to play with all the time cheats and is very defensive when called on it. He's also quick to call various other people cheats, including Dustin Johnson after a certain incident at a certain major.

My solution has been to stop playing with him (and largely to stop hanging out with him, although other reasons went into that).

This.

 

That's what I did to one of my old golf buddies.  I called him on it a few times by nicely asking "what about your penalty stroke" or "did you count that flubbed chip shot" or simply saying "are you sure about that?", but when he kept doing it, I dropped him like a hot potato.

 

Haven't played with him in years and have no intention of playing with him.

post #5 of 18

My old boss was famous for cheating. We use to give each other ge mes, on a par 3 where he'd take 2 shots to get within a foot of the hole, his 3 rd was a geme, the problem was, he'd mark a birdie down on his score card, and did this all the time. He also wouldn't count penalty shots. Once I found another job, I stopped playing with him, as did my friend. 

post #6 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Hammer 4 View Post

My old boss was famous for cheating. We use to give each other ge mes, on a par 3 where he'd take 2 shots to get within a foot of the hole, his 3 rd was a geme, the problem was, he'd mark a birdie down on his score card, and did this all the time. He also wouldn't count penalty shots. Once I found another job, I stopped playing with him, as did my friend. 

Wait...what???
post #7 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by colin007 View Post


Wait...what???

 

 

Yup, instead of a par, he gave himself a birdie..In life he was the same way, cheated me, and other's out of wages, he even cheated his father in law out of 1000's of dollars. he was a contractor, and his father in law was a pool contractor, he had cancer surgery, and couldn't work, so he had my old boss kind of help him on jobs, and also added him to his business checking account. I could go on, and on..I know for a fact that karma finally caught up with him. he lost his new custom house on a golf curse, lost his contractors lic. also.:-D 

post #8 of 18

Cheating hurts the perpetrator more than his playing partners. He's going to look like a fool when he plays in tournaments that use his official handicap index. And if he ever tries to cheat in a tournament, good luck to him. 

post #9 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Shenanigunz View Post

I'm sure this has been brought up before, but a friend and coworker that I play golf with almost on a weekly basis is a cheater. Yesterday I counted three strokes on the first two holes that he didn't record. Drive not where he wanted it on the fairway, tees up another ball. Lost ball or in the water, drops without penalty. Hits a chip fat or thin, drops another ball and picks up his first without penalty. Ball under a tree, shoe wedge , with no penalties. Conveniently forgets to count strokes. On and on.

My grandfather taught me the game of golf with a pretty strict adherence to the rules. I was also a member of a country club, which for my time there further set in stone that you don't cheat at the game of golf. I believe that golf mirrors life, and if you are willing to lie and cheat at golf, they you are willing to lie and cheat in other areas. I want to talk with him about it, but don't want to come across as uptight as he may not see the game as seriously as I do.

Oh, btw he "beat" me by two strokes yesterday....

 

It's not cheating unless his intent is to defraud someone.  It's just dishonesty, and in reality he's only lying to himself. Leave him to his fantasy, or tell him to open his wallet put some money on the game, then you have the right to call him on every lie.

post #10 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fourputt View Post

It's not cheating unless his intent is to defraud someone.  It's just dishonesty, and in reality he's only lying to himself. Leave him to his fantasy, or tell him to open his wallet put some money on the game, then you have the right to call him on every lie.

That's a good point.
post #11 of 18

I think it depends on the context. I take mulligans once in a while or play a few balls and take a few gimmies, etc. However, I do this when I am playing casually by myself or with friends. When I am recording a handicap I adhere to the rules. If this guy you're talking about is playing in this manner and has the nerve to tell you he shot the score he put down on his scorecard, then you just need to stop playing with him. Even worse if he is playing for a handicap or you guys are playing in a competitive manner. Better yet, if you can break your code of conduct for one round, out-cheat him at his own game. He'll get the idea.

post #12 of 18
Quote:
Originally Posted by Fourputt View Post

It's not cheating unless his intent is to defraud someone.  It's just dishonesty, and in reality he's only lying to himself. Leave him to his fantasy, or tell him to open his wallet put some money on the game, then you have the right to call him on every lie.

Yep this is always my take on it. Putting a few dollars on each hole gives you the right to call him out on his "beating" you and be confrontational about it rather than just shaking your head.

And of course only if a guy is lying about his score and then bragging about "beating" me. That would make me pretty mad.
post #13 of 18

I have no problem with someone who doesn't want to keep score, I don't understand it, but it's fine. Frankly, I don't care if you follow the rules at all, so long as everyone in the group knows knows what's going on and agrees.  But if you're going to record the round...What is the point if you're not honest?

post #14 of 18
This appears to be quite a common problem! In fact I too started a thread about this some time ago "does anybody play with a cheat"
I have now found the solution to this problem!
As approaching the first tee, you ask clearly, "right, are we playing proper rules? He'll say yes, you then clarify, hit it where it lies! He'll say yes, you then confirm, no free drops or gimmes, he'll say yes, and Remind him on drives are 3 off the tee! Then go, and make sure you pull that cheat on every sneaky move he makes and remind him you both both agreed to play properly! Do this everytime! He'll either learn to play properly, or find other cheats to play with!
post #15 of 18
As I've said before, I truly couldn't care less what "rules" anybody else plays by or what "score" they claim they shot unless they are playing against me or anybody else in some kind of a competition or if they are keeping track of a handicap.

If they are just playing for fun they can have thier fun anyway they like.

If they said they beat me I would smile at them and say, yeah you really beat me.
post #16 of 18

I don't know anyone that plays this way but I see strangers doing it all the time. Got paired up with a guy and his GF on Fri. After holing out on #8 he mentioned something about making 5 pars and 3 bogies. I didn't say anything, I'll never see him again and we had no bets but it seemed odd considering I don't think he made better than a double that I saw. Reality was he didn't make any legit scores period because he wasn't playing under the ROG. Hit a mulligan on the first tee, picked up some putts, the usual stuff. Odd thing was not once did he have honors and I played like shit so obviously he knew where he stood but to say you are +3 after 8 holes when you didn't even complete the first hole just makes you look silly.

post #17 of 18

I have always been of the opinion;  Your score is your own.  This unless you are playing for money.  These people are only cheating themselves.

post #18 of 18

I do think it depends on the situation.  Some of it could be ignorance in which case you have to find a good way to approach the situation.  (i.e.  A guy hits it out of bounds and proceeds to drop on the line of flight right off of the OB marker.  Now he really thought that because his ball hit in bounds first that he could drop there.  I explained the real rule to him and before we teed off the next time, we played the next time we were clear on how we would play that shot).  I had another friend that I would joke with that I loved his follow through (as he finished his swing his left hand would release from the club and go straight to his pocket to grab another ball and proceed to drop it to hit another shot)...  The serious but not serious I'm joking with you but I mean it kind of thing...  yeah that works sometimes too...   Sometimes you can draw attention to it in a way that says "hey that's really not the proper way to do that" and you can do it without being offensive...  If it's for money, you can be more blunt.  If it's for fun and bragging rights, be easy about it that time but address it before you tee off the next time...

 

Either way just make sure you and your playing partners keep having fun...  otherwise why play with them?

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