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Dustin Johnson taking a leave of absence from tour, Suspended for cocaine use - Page 21

post #361 of 455
Will he for sure be back on tour if he can prove he's clean again?
post #362 of 455

I think there was a discussion of "you can either take a leave of absence or you can be suspended"

post #363 of 455
Quote:
 At what point to we hold people responsible for their actions and have the ability to call them out for poor decisions?  Seems here that anyone who's critical of DJ's behavior is being attacked for acting superior which is pretty sad. 

 

"I hate Dustin Johnson because he married a party girl and, while I don't really know him, I am going to call him all sorts of horrible things in public based on virtually nothing" is what envious jerks say.

 

"Drugs are a very damaging thing and I condemn their use.  I hope that Dustin recovers from a health problem of his own making." is what loving human beings say.

 

Of course you can call people out for bad decisions.  But when it becomes insults because someone is struggling, it marks you as a Grade A jerk.  Decent human beings look at someone who has ruined his life out of stupidity and feel sorry for them.  Jealous human beings look at someone who has ruined their life out of stupidity and feel anger / the need to condemn.

 

This thread is pretty revealing about how happy some people are with their own lives, IMO.

post #364 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnclayton1982 View Post

 

"I hate Dustin Johnson because he married a party girl and, while I don't really know him, I am going to call him all sorts of horrible things in public based on virtually nothing" is what envious jerks say.

 

"Drugs are a very damaging thing and I condemn their use.  I hope that Dustin recovers from a health problem of his own making." is what loving human beings say.

 

Of course you can call people out for bad decisions.  But when it becomes insults because someone is struggling, it marks you as a Grade A jerk.  Decent human beings look at someone who has ruined his life out of stupidity and feel sorry for them.  Jealous human beings look at someone who has ruined their life out of stupidity and feel anger / the need to condemn.

 

This thread is pretty revealing about how happy some people are with their own lives, IMO.

Eh, I think some people just don't display enough compassion sometimes. Some people forget that everyone has issues. However, not everyone chooses the healthiest of ways to cope with their issues. Quite frankly, some people can't cope with their issues. People think that celebrities and athletes should be happy with their money, fame and material riches because they think that they themselves would be happy if they could switch places. More often than not, that scenario would turn out to be false if the person judging could step into the athlete's shoes.

Does he have a hell of a life? Sure, absolutely and he deserves it because it's being lived through his own success. But, I can still be a decent human at the end of the day and put aside "envy" or "jealousy" to say that I hope he gets the help he needs and that I'd like to see him back on tour sooner rather than later.

In my opinion, the easy thing to do is write the guy off and say "He's a millionaire with a hot piece of ass and he's partying up and blowing his cash on blow! He's a moron!". I don't think 99.9% of the people saying stuff like this know the guy personally, or know him well enough to make that claim.

post #365 of 455
Quote:
 But, I can still be a decent human at the end of the day and put aside "envy" or "jealousy" to say that I hope he gets the help he needs and that I'd like to see him back on tour sooner rather than later.

 

This is exactly the response a decent human being should have.  No envy or jealousy here.  This is the sympathetic, god-fearing response.  He is a human and he deserves sympathy and respect from his fellow humans.

 

He is a drug addict.  I've had drug addicts in my family.  They are sad and should be pitied, not hated.  To say what some others said on here (chicken legs, fake tan, etc...) is cruel, hateful and from a bad place in their own lives.

 

EDIT: Its either that, or some people like to say outrageous things because they enjoy getting a response out of others for some reason.  If that is the case, and I'm feeding the trolls, I apologize.

post #366 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnclayton1982 View Post

This is exactly the response a decent human being should have.  No envy or jealousy here.  This is the sympathetic, god-fearing response.  He is a human and he deserves sympathy and respect from his fellow humans.

He is a drug addict.  I've had drug addicts in my family.  They are sad and should be pitied, not hated.  To say what some others said on here (chicken legs, fake tan, etc...) is cruel, hateful and from a bad place in their own lives.

EDIT: Its either that, or some people like to say outrageous things because they enjoy getting a response out of others for some reason.  If that is the case, and I'm feeding the trolls, I apologize.
Compassion?!
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post #367 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spyder View Post
 

Eh, I think some people just don't display enough compassion sometimes. Some people forget that everyone has issues. However, not everyone chooses the healthiest of ways to cope with their issues.

I have nothing against him personally, but my compassion is reserved for those who are in their situation through actions not their own.

I hate that it happened.  I hope he overcomes it.  But he is in this situation because of decisions that he made.  No one held a gun to his head and made him do his first line of blow.

 

I'm certainly not claiming to be any better than he is.  I'm the cause of my troubles as well.

 

I hope he beats it and does well in both golf and life.

post #368 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnclayton1982 View Post
 

 

This is exactly the response a decent human being should have.  No envy or jealousy here.  This is the sympathetic, god-fearing response.  He is a human and he deserves sympathy and respect from his fellow humans.

 

He is a drug addict.  I've had drug addicts in my family.  They are sad and should be pitied, not hated.  To say what some others said on here (chicken legs, fake tan, etc...) is cruel, hateful and from a bad place in their own lives.

 

EDIT: Its either that, or some people like to say outrageous things because they enjoy getting a response out of others for some reason.  If that is the case, and I'm feeding the trolls, I apologize.

Sorry. Not agreeing.

DJ's drug taking and his fiancé's shameless publicity seeking and artificial appearance are the ugly side of modern life.

And what on earth is a "god-fearing response"?

And you are the one that used the word "hate". Your patronising tone helps no-one - but if it makes you feel great, good for you.

If you want a daughter or wife like her, great. If you want a husband or son like him, good luck to you.

Would you want them as parents? -Hmmm

When the likes of Paulina Gretzky gets some publicity that paints her in a bad light, it's of her own choosing. You can't pick and choose. And DJ, being a weak person has obviously been swept away by the attractions of her type of "lifestyle".

I'm only glad we aren't going to get to see her at the Ryder Cup looking all prim and proper in a cream coloured suit with a red white and blue scarf. She is vile.

post #369 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cool Breeze View Post
 

I have nothing against him personally, but my compassion is reserved for those who are in their situation through actions not their own.

I hate that it happened.  I hope he overcomes it.  But he is in this situation because of decisions that he made.  No one held a gun to his head and made him do his first line of blow.

 

I'm certainly not claiming to be any better than he is.  I'm the cause of my troubles as well.

 

I hope he beats it and does well in both golf and life.

Is there a compassion shortage out there that I am aware of?  @Shorty just said this same think over in the drugs thread.

 

If I read a story about a tragic plane crash this afternoon and then come to find out that I have no compassion left because I gave my last two liters (how is it measured???) to Dustin Johnson, boy am I going to have egg on my face.

 

Also, I think your last statement kind of contradicts that.  Rooting for him to get well and improve his life could be considered a bit compassionate by some, so you might want to be careful about that. :-P

post #370 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Golfingdad View Post

Is there a compassion shortage out there that I am aware of?  @Shorty
 just said this same think over in the drugs thread.

If I read a story about a tragic plane crash this afternoon and then come to find out that I have no compassion left because I gave my last two liters (how is it measured???) to Dustin Johnson, boy am I going to have egg on my face.

Also, I think your last statement kind of contradicts that.  Rooting for him to get well and improve his life could be considered a bit compassionate by some, so you might want to be careful about that. b2_tongue.gif
That is exactly the right attitude. There's only enough compassion to go around! Can't be wasting it on DJ! Personally, mine went to anyone in Liberia, Sierra Leone, or Guinea today.
post #371 of 455
Too much damn compassion in this situation (IN MY HUMBLE OPINION) is almost enabling. Im not rooting for or against DJ, Im just indifferent. He wants to throw his life away fine, he comes back from this please dont throw him a damn parade just for being clean.

This was from a golf.com interview with DJ from 2010

You're a pretty laid back guy. What makes you angry?
When someone tells me that I can't do something. Because that just makes me go, "F—-off, I'll show you!" That's how I work. Telling me that I can't do something is probably the worst thing that anyone can say, because I'll definitely do it. I'm very determined.

What's your favorite part of being a Tour pro?
Everything. I play the best courses, meet the best people, travel the world. I do things I never would get to do otherwise.

Someone needs to tell this guy he will never get clean I guess.


http://www.golf.com/tour-and-news/dustin-johnson-last-years-mishaps-and-how-brush-crime-and-tragedy-changed-him-forever
post #372 of 455

Edited to nothing to short circuit this argument.  I have some family issues with drugs and I suppose am super-sensitive to someone stereotyping and being what I think is cruel.  That said, I went overboard with this post so I edited it.

 

Back to the golf side of the forum. :)

post #373 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Golfingdad View Post
 

Is there a compassion shortage out there that I am aware of?  

Not necessarily a shortage but my compassion is mine to give and I choose to give it to people who can't help the situation they're in.

 

I realize that everyone here are super christian boy scouts who want to swoop in and save him from himself.  Good for you.

post #374 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cool Breeze View Post
 

Not necessarily a shortage but my compassion is mine to give and I choose to give it to people who can't help the situation they're in.

 

I realize that everyone here are super christian boy scouts who want to swoop in and save him from himself.  Good for you.

 

You have no idea of how Dustin Johnson got to where he is today. Maybe he had a difficult childhood or had negative role models who influenced his behavior. Just because he has had success in golf and has a lot of money today doesn't mean he is wired to handle it.

 

I ain't no Christian goody-goody, but I will still pray for him that he gets his life straightened out.

post #375 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by johnclayton1982 View Post
 

John, You're a good guy, no need to apologize for sharing your feelings about a topic.  There's no right or wrong and while I was probably one of the people you were directing your post towards, no offense is taken.   We can disagree and still be friends.  :beer:

post #376 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by phan52 View Post
 

 

You have no idea of how Dustin Johnson got to where he is today. Maybe he had a difficult childhood or had negative role models who influenced his behavior. 

Yes I do know how he got there.

 

He made a conscious decision to do drugs.  That's how he got there.

 

Quote:
I ain't no Christian goody-goody, but I will still pray for him that he gets his life straightened out.

We agree on the last part there.

I certainly don't wish him continued bad luck either.

post #377 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cool Breeze View Post
 

I have nothing against him personally, but my compassion is reserved for those who are in their situation through actions not their own.

I hate that it happened.  I hope he overcomes it.  But he is in this situation because of decisions that he made.  No one held a gun to his head and made him do his first line of blow.

 

I'm certainly not claiming to be any better than he is.  I'm the cause of my troubles as well.

 

I hope he beats it and does well in both golf and life.

I definitely respect your opinion. The one thing that I disagree with is the part in bold though. Obviously he made his own decisions and chose to do what he did. However, some people do not have coping mechanisms that function as well as other people's. Some people cope just fine until a massive amount of "stuff" catches up to them and they crash. There are some people who carry on in life and understand that life has a lot of ups and downs and they can deal with it in a healthy and productive way. Other people simply do not discard the downs like bent cards in a deck though and they just keep piling up until the tower collapses (such a simple-minded example there, but hey it works in context...). When the people of the latter are offered an "out" and they experience a high, those few seconds, minutes or hours of bliss are worth a lot to them. It's a quick escape from everything that is bothering them and the feeling is simply addicting and can overpower rational thoughts.

I'm not saying everyone should hold hands and pray for DJ and feel awful for the guy, or write him any cards. What I'm saying is that nobody knows how this guy's brain works and what he goes through, or even puts himself through, mentally. People are too prone to write people off and say "F it, they did this to themselves. Now let them fix it, or they can weed themselves out of society". What some people fail to realize is that people with addiction or depression sometimes do not know how to cope with "life" and "drama" in general. Those downs keep piling up and overshadow all of the ups, including fame, money, beautiful women, vacations, yachts, etc.

Compassion doesn't have to come in the form of tears and prayers. Compassion can be as simple as taking a moment to say "Damn, the guy has some issues. Hopefully he works through them and gets help". 

(@CoolBreeze20 I only quoted your post to "generalize". I'm not directing anything at you specifically. I just wanted to elaborate in blanket fashion and you provided an example for me to work with. By "some people" in my long rant, I'm just referring to people in society in general - not just here on TST).

post #378 of 455
Quote:
Originally Posted by Spyder View Post
 

I definitely respect your opinion. The one thing that I disagree with is the part in bold though. Obviously he made his own decisions and chose to do what he did. However, some people do not have coping mechanisms that function as well as other people's. Some people cope just fine until a massive amount of "stuff" catches up to them and they crash. There are some people who carry on in life and understand that life has a lot of ups and downs and they can deal with it in a healthy and productive way. Other people simply do not discard the downs like bent cards in a deck though and they just keep piling up until the tower collapses (such a simple-minded example there, but hey it works in context...). When the people of the latter are offered an "out" and they experience a high, those few seconds, minutes or hours of bliss are worth a lot to them. It's a quick escape from everything that is bothering them and the feeling is simply addicting and can overpower rational thoughts.

I'm not saying everyone should hold hands and pray for DJ and feel awful for the guy, or write him any cards. What I'm saying is that nobody knows how this guy's brain works and what he goes through, or even puts himself through, mentally. People are too prone to write people off and say "F it, they did this to themselves. Now let them fix it, or they can weed themselves out of society". What some people fail to realize is that people with addiction or depression sometimes do not know how to cope with "life" and "drama" in general. Those downs keep piling up and overshadow all of the ups, including fame, money, beautiful women, vacations, yachts, etc.

Compassion doesn't have to come in the form of tears and prayers. Compassion can be as simple as taking a moment to say "Damn, the guy has some issues. Hopefully he works through them and gets help". 
 

Great post and for a lot of people I agree they are not mentally equipped to deal with life's challenges and deserve more compassion and sympathy than criticism.

 

I'm not stating I don't have any compassion or sympathy for DJ but I'm having a tough time believing that a guy who can play golf at his level, deal with the pressure of a tournament and achieve the level of success in life he has is one of those people you describe.  DJ has made some really questionable life choices;

  • Using illegal drugs in a sport that prohibits and tests for them
  • Choosing a girl friend that has a reputation for being a partier (she might be a sweet girl, I only know of her what the press reports).
  • Sleeping with not one but two wives of guys on Tour.  You can say what you want about the wives roles in this, but it's a dirtbag move to sleep with someone's wife, especially when you work with the guys and are all vocal about their Christian beliefs, including DJ.
  • Continuing to use illegal drugs after failing a test and being suspended from his job.

 

These acts don't appear to reflect a guy who's unable to handle life, they more appear to be actions of a selfish, arrogant guy who doesn't care about anyone or anything except himself.  This attitude may have resulted in him getting addicted to coke but what led him to addiction is likely not something that is deserving of pity imo.  Sometimes people just need to be smacked in the face and told to grow up and act like a responsible adult.

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