Here's a couple of examples. The first is Dustin Johnson's caddie, who just happens to be his Brother. I've heard on the golf telecasts that he has higher clubhead speed with the Driver than DJ! But, who knows where it goes? So DJ plays and his Bro caddies.
The other example is me. A few years ago, we were playing a local upscale, daily fee course. The hole was a 399 yard par 4. We were still playing the white tees, even though I had lost a bit of speed. If I could pump a drive out there 230, I was good! My buddy was still fooling himself, thinking he was hitting it 260-270. He hit his usual drive, and somehow, I really blasted one!
Before we left the tee I asked my buddy how long he thought he hit that drive. He said 250-260. We get to his ball and he has 179 in, meaning he hit that drive 220! This is verified by GPS btw. I pointed it out to him and he got pissed! Meanwhile I can see my ball much further down the fairway. When we drove up to it the GPS read 100 yards. Meaning I had hit that drive 299 yards, at 63 years of age!
This is the greatest example of an "outlier" that I can imagine! Somehow, by accident, I had done everything perfectly and really launched one! Hadn't happened for years before that, and hasn't happened since! But it illustrates that it CAN happen.
It's very simple - if you intend to change the playing characteristics of your golf ball by artificially heating or cooling it, you are breaking the rules. Every single one of your contrived circumstances can be covered and answered by this very plain and common sense explanation.
You cannot wash your ball in warm water if you're doing so to intentionally make the ball go further. You can wash your ball in warm water if you're a normal person doing it because it gets dirt off the ball better. You cannot place your golf balls in a special insulated black sack designed to act like a sauna to heat the balls up. You can place your golf balls in a black sack if it just happens to be what you store your golf balls in.
Golf is a game of honor and intent, and this is no different than the dozens of other rules regarding activities prohibited only if the player intended to gain an advantage. It makes the judgement of the rule very simple for honest golfers, and more difficult for those intent on toeing the line as close as possible so that they can gain an advantage so small as to be nearly unmeasurable. I know which type of golfer I am, and I also know which type of golfer I'd rather play with in a tournament.