Bribe My 13 yr Son To Play Golf?

[ks8829]

My son is 13 years old and a freshman in High School, He has played golf since 7 years old, he has a nice golf swing, he's played 18 holes about 3 times and is considering joinning the high school golf team.

My problem is that he doesn't want to play golf, he says its not fun, he has been playing basketball since 4th grade year round and loves to play and practice.

What should I do? he is off this Monday because of teacher's meeting or something and I offered to play 18 holes with him and a friend at school who is on the golf team last year and myself and my brother but he finally said no after 5 days of maybes.

Should I bribe my son to play golf this Monday? he knows golf with help him later in life but will not practice. The last time he played golf was December 2007 and only 9 holes.

I want him to prepare for try outs and he has not touched a club for 10 months, he still might make the team because of his skills but I am disappointed in his lack of interested.

I am considering asking him what do I need to do to get you to play this Monday.... any suggestions is appreciated,

Thanks in advance for your replies

[Smallville]

Let him play basketball?

Parents push kids to play things the PARENTS want. Let the kid play the sports HE wants. Maybe he'll take up golf seriously later, but MAKE a kid do something and they'll resent it.

You said he's considering joing the golf team, is he really, or did you suggest it and he said he'd think about it? If he really is, let him do it at his own pace. Especially if he's not a big loser otherwise (i.e., getting in trouble all the time, fighting, etc.). If he's a good kid, DEFINITELY let him do the extracurricular stuff HE wants to do. You may just have to find another golf partner for the next few years. Sorry, dad.

[MSDOGS1976]

Let him play what he wants. All you can do is introduce him to the game as you did, but you can't make him like it. Who knows, he may want to play it by his sophmore year.

[Stacey_E]

Yeah I wouldn't push him either. But If I wanted to be sneaky about it, I'd go to the statement about "he says it's not fun". Maybe there is a way he can experience golf as a FUN outing?

I see youngsters on the range with adults barking swing instructions at them and telling them 3 things they did wrong on a shot before the ball even hits the ground. Please, please don't think that I'm saying you fall into that category! This topic just made me think of other junior golfers I've seen on the course. I feel for these kids because they can't be having fun. It's got to be like going to the dentist at boot camp.

[wrx_junki]

Monetary rewards on each hole? Maybe something like birdie $10, par $5.

I used to be the same way when I was younger. I loved to basketball and so did most of my friends. Golf didn't have the similar appeal for some reason.

[Q.Q.Quillume]

My son is 13 years old and a freshman in High School, He has played golf since 7 years old, he has a nice golf swing, he's played 18 holes about 3 times and is considering joinning the high school golf team.

I'm a little confused here - - - a 13 year old is in the 9th grade?

My vote is no, do not bribe him to play golf. He might interpret this as "forcing" him to play golf and might (and rightly so) resent your "forcing" him to do someting he doesn't want to do. It's his life and there's prenty of time for him to gravitate back to golf if he is ever interested in doing so. Best luck to you and your son!

[iQuest Golfer]

My son is 13 years old and a freshman in High School, He has played golf since 7 years old, he has a nice golf swing, he's played 18 holes about 3 times and is considering joinning the high school golf team.

You are in a tight spot!

I can honestly say the most fun I have had is playing golf with both sons. Better than sitting in the stands and watching them basketball, baseball, soccer, skateboarding. etc. But, you can't force your son to play. You might be able to have his friend influence him. Or, tell him that it would be great to have him play with you and his uncle... the family angle (which I think is a good angle.) He might not want to play because he knows that he's not sharp. You might consider mixing up the round... two-man scramble, alternate shot team... switching things up after every 6 or 9 holes... do something that lessens the individual competitiveness of the round. Keep supporting him and creating opportunities for "together" time. It will happen.

[firstcut]

I would accept the fact that your kid is not you and let him be.

[EquipmentJunkie]

I'm a little confused here - - - a 13 year old is in the 9th grade?

I was 12 in the 9th grade :D

As for your son my dad tried to get me to play forever, the more he nagged the more I resisted. When he left me alone I started playing, such is the condition of the teenage mind.

[tonyy]

EquipmentJunkie is right, my dad always asked me to go golfing when I was a teen. I would just say no thanks and do my own thing. Fast forward to now, I totally wish I would've played with him. I would be a lot better than I am right now and the memories of golfing with my dad would be awesome.

I'm glad I started later than never because every time I go golfing with my dad, I have so much fun.

I hope your son comes around though and decides to play it more often. Don't pressure him to play competitively if he doesn't want to. A casual and fun round of golf would be great, I think.

[st0wgolf08]

Why would you want to pay him, he will have no fun and just do it for the money, which will then equate into him not wanting to spend time with you unless you are paying him to do so.

[Cleveland Gunmetal]

I share the same thoughts of many others in here. I don't think parents should force kids to play, bribe them or come up with some sneaky way to convince them to play a sport they don't want to play. I think all you can do is introduce the sport and offer to play with him, which I think is really great by the way and I'd keep doing that in a non-pushy way. But I'd let him play what sport he wants to play. Obviously I know nothing about the kid beyond what you have posted but it sounds like he's into other activites (basketball) so I'd just let him be. Now if he's getting in trouble and needs an outlet to keep him out of trouble then that's a different story.

Good luck!

Oh... not sure how this is Tour Talk. Might be a bit premature!

[kc8kir]

I think the real problem here is finding out why your son doesn't enjoy golf. Why is it not fun?

All his friends play other sports?

He feels too much pressure from his father to perform and can't just play to enjoy the game?

Golf practice has been a chore in the past, and was not a positive experience?

Golf isn't seen as "cool" among his peers?

Your child is in his early teen years, a period of self discovery. He will bounce back and forth between interests. Golf needs to be something he finds himself. Otherwise it will always be a source of frustration.

[automatic31]

I think the real problem here is finding out why your son doesn't enjoy golf. Why is it not fun?

I am 13 and I know golf is love or hate, dont force it on him I KNOW what it feels like

[Uber$winG]

I know I’m chiming in late here but I’d give him an option: Either play golf or go to military school and play war.

[Henry]

Hi, i am just a yar older than your son and i feel for him. If i werehim i would feel very let down if my parents tryed to bribe me to do things that arn't nesessary. Ask him to play with you (it would be great) but if he wants to play basketball support him with that instead. I would love it if my Dad would be more like you and offer to play golf with me

[ks8829]

Hi, i am just a yar older than your son and i feel for him. If i werehim i would feel very let down if my parents tryed to bribe me to do things that arn't nesessary. Ask him to play with you (it would be great) but if he wants to play basketball support him with that instead. I would love it if my Dad would be more like you and offer to play golf with me

Thanks for your feedback. I appreciate the feedback from a teenager. :)