bad language in public

[ghalfaire]

I suspect this will be controversial and so have hesitated to start this thread. But I am curious about opinions of what I consider bad language in public. Let me say first I am no prude. I have used and heard a lot of bad language in my time but I don’t use it normal conversations and never in public. It is just a matter of respect for fellow citizens in my opinion.

Last Saturday I took my 12 year old Grand Daughter to a football game at the local University. Seated directly behind us were some young men (compared to me anyway. I think they were 25-35 years old). It seemed as if every third word was F—in this or F—in that or MF or worst. So I turned and said as respectfully as I could that I had a young girl with me and would appreciate it if they would not use that language. The response was from the apparent spokesman that if I didn’t like their language that I could kiss their posterior and “what are you going to do about that Old man”. So I said if you don’t clean up the language I’ll just have to get someone in charge to ask you to as my days for physical combat are a way behind me, particularly true if I am giving away 40 years or so. So when they continued I did go and get a police officer and he came and told them clean it up or to leave the premises. Seems as if these fellows were not the sharpest tools in the shed as they told the officer that they had a “right” to use any language anywhere and anytime they wanted and he couldn’t do a thing about. Apparently the officer didn’t agree and escorted them to the sub station at the stadium and I didn’t’ see them again.

Comments?

[jamo]

Anytime you are at a college, you have to expect some language. BUT when you ask them to stop they should have, especially since all sports stadiums that I have been to explicitly tell you to refrain from using language at the risk of being kicked out. I use language and drop f bombs and stuff all the time, but just around friends and stuff. And if anyone asks me to stop I do (or would, because my own personal moral coding never actually lets it get that far).

[mdl]

This seems pretty uncontroversial. If it was just you and your wife at a college game (where you should expect drunken swearing) and some drunk guys were swearing a lot and you made a big show of getting them to stop, then I'd think you were probably being lame (even though I've definitely been near that group of guys before and they surely suck, and of course exactly how I personally would call it depends on exactly what went down). But it seems pretty uncontroversial to ask a bunch of obnoxious drunk guys to stop being obnoxious and swearing a ton with your 12 year old grand daughter in tow.

[limoric]

I drop F-bombs regularly and especially among business associates (you would be amazed at the language in executive meetings, especially among Lawyers), but public is a different story. Swearing is meant as an exclamation point to people you know in a familiar environment...you would never do it outside of this situation; what's the point...the people around you have no idea why you're doing it other than to be an a$$. You did the right thing, I would not have even given them a warning, I would have had their a$$es thrown out immediately, they should have known better (I also have 2 young daughters)...

[bwell]

I cant believe how disrespectful those guys were, it makes you wonder how people are raised...

If I heard what was going on I definitely would have help you out by getting a police officers myself so you would have had to miss a minute of the game you payed for.

[Fat Slice]

A few stadiums now let you send an SMS text message to ask for help in those kinds of situations - I think that's a great service.

http://www.instadiumsolutions.com/in...d=44&Itemid;=53

Those guys were out of line. They should have not been swearing in the first place, and they should have apologized and knocked it off when you asked them to stop.

The good thing is that the cop took care of things. +1 for that kind of responsibility.

[shades9323]

I wouldn't go to a sporting event expecting anything different. By 12, your grand daughter has likely heard it all before and even used those words. I probably would have asked them to stop once and that would be the end of it. If they didn't stop I wouldn't have involved the police. Now if they are spilling their drinks on my kid, it would be a different story. I can't fault you for your actions though.

[Leftygolfer]

You did the right thing. I used to have a real issue with cursing and I've made a real effort to change. I've noticed since I changed it just makes people look stupid. I also have a little boy that I would like to be able to punish for saying bad words and be a good example for. It makes watching football a little different. I am not just silently mad at the television.

But what a couple of jerks. I couldn't imagine being that way after someone says they have a little girl with them.

[srjorion]

I'm sorry, but people who cuss around younger kids have issues. I'll drop an occasional cuss word in public, but never around kids. Sure, they may have heard it before, but there's no need for me to be the one to give them a reminder. Good move letting proper authorities handle it.

SRJ

[lumpuckeroo]

I think we should all be congnisant of our surrounds, I'm not the least bit worried about my language golfing with my buddies, but in a social setting I'm very alert as to my choice of words. In my family my grandfather was a renowed cusser, some of my first words were cuss words, but as my father learned and I learned and my children have learned, the effect that create is best used in moderation!

[Blades4me]

I suspect this will be controversial and so have hesitated to start this thread. But I am curious about opinions of what I consider bad language in public. Let me say first I am no prude. I have used and heard a lot of bad language in my time but I don’t use it normal conversations and never in public. It is just a matter of respect for fellow citizens in my opinion.

Sounds like you handled it pretty well to me. I have to agree that the younger generations are very poor at expressing themselves is a educated way and the explitives are very excessive now. I get caught up in it once in awhile myself, but am able to correct myself. Also, if they are in the shape I see lots of those young guys they would probably hit the wall if they had to to anything physical for more than 2 minutes.

[The Road Dog]

I wouldn't go to a sporting event expecting anything different. By 12, your grand daughter has likely heard it all before and even used those words. I probably would have asked them to stop once and that would be the end of it. If they didn't stop I wouldn't have involved the police. Now if they are spilling their drinks on my kid, it would be a different story. I can't fault you for your actions though.

You have pretty low expectations of someone else's child, I wonder why.

[ghalfaire]

Well I appreciate the feed back. I feel a little better about what I did. The First Amendment is important enough to not be wasted on offending someone just because you can.

My Grand Daughter attends a public Middle School and I have heard the kids on campus talk to each other so I have no illusions here about what she has or has not heard. But that doesn't change the fact that use of such language in my home was and is a no no and I would hope that my Daughter would pass that along to her children. I'm not a prude and can drop an F bomb if I nail my thumb instead of the nail or some other stressful event occurs. But I don't curse in normal day to day conversations and think it shows a disrespect for others who may be offended to do so.

[BostonSully]

How much were these kids drinking? College Kids + Booze + Football = Cussing/Fighting. So you do need to go in with a prior expectation that something like that might happen. This is the reason I cant go to sports events with my Dad. He'll get in like 5fights everytime we go because he takes exception to stuff like this. Not exactly swearing but constantly yelling in his ear or being otherwise obnoxious.

Ha I dont think Id ever bring my kid to a game when they are young unless I could get a box seat haha.. Sad but true.

[limoric]

How much were these kids drinking? College Kids + Booze + Football = Cussing/Fighting. So you do need to go in with a prior expectation that something like that might happen. This is the reason I cant go to sports events with my Dad. He'll get in like 5fights everytime we go because he takes exception to stuff like this. Not exactly swearing but constantly yelling in his ear or being otherwise obnoxious.

That's like saying it's OK for them to do it (because you expect it). Here's some food for thought, If we don't expect people to behave improperly and call them on it when they do, society will uphold a better moral standard. Yes it could often result in conflict, but that is why we have peace officers and why we pay tax. No way in Hell I will deprive my children from experiences I enjoyed as a child...

Too many people bite their lip to prevent conflict, it only sends a bad message...

[Neco]

I suspect this will be controversial and so have hesitated to start this thread. But I am curious about opinions of what I consider bad language in public. Let me say first I am no prude. I have used and heard a lot of bad language in my time but I don’t use it normal conversations and never in public. It is just a matter of respect for fellow citizens in my opinion.

Cursing around children is bad form. Those guys were idiots.

[srjorion]

Too many people bite their lip to prevent conflict, it only sends a bad message...

I partially agree here. Yes, you do have to call out those who aren't behaving, especially around kids. Unfortunately sometimes doing so brings out even worse behavior from those being idiots. I've seen it happen and some poor dude got assaulted in front of his kids as a result. I believe the OP did the right thing in not getting too confrontational and then letting security deal with the losers.

SRJ

[BostonSully]

That's like saying it's OK for them to do it (because you expect it). Here's some food for thought, If we don't expect people to behave improperly and call them on it when they do, society will uphold a better moral standard. Yes it could often result in conflict, but that is why we have peace officers and why we pay tax. No way in Hell I will deprive my children from experiences I enjoyed as a child...

Here your assuming that your perception of right vs wrong is the correct one. While you might pay to go to a game sit there enjoy it quitely, others pay to go to a game to go be loud and obnoxious. You both payed the same ticket price who is in the right? Do you have a right to peace and civlity at a game? Its not guaranteed on the ticket. If you want to make sure that your kids will be completely free from that get box or luxury seats as the a$$holes all sit in the cheapo seats. If not its part of what you signed up for. If its really bothering you, you can do as the OP and get the cops involved. But I would suggest against starting conflict with rowdy drunk 20 year olds particularly if with your kids terrible idea.