How many times a week do you get to play golf?

[walk18]

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

sorry if you take offense, but there is a big difference between recreational "joe's" who play a few times a year and those passionate about the game.  It's not a knock.....it's just what separates the occasional golfer from dedicated players.(aside from handicap) There's nothing wrong with being a "JOE"....it's not his passion.  Maybe he likes to race cars or fish on his spare time.  (nothing wrong with that)

There are players and there are those who arent.....In a Joe's mind, he can't play this summer....gettin' married next year ya'know...he'll be too busy pleasing the wife 24/7 and all..ya know!! ......no time for golf....no time to leave the house!..LOL There is no way she will allow a 630am tee time saturday morning because she may need me?....LOL

You're either a player or you aren't...... there is no shame in being the occasional golfer.  Just don't pretend to be passionate if you don't really play the game regularly. There is no shame in being a JOE.....I'm just not that guy.  Believe it or not, it's possible to be a 1HC and have a family life too.....

I have to agree with this. If you care enough about the game, you'll find time to play, AND be a good parent, those things are not mutually exclusive. I've seen this happen to so many guys, they have kids, and the wife dictates everything, and they become miserable. They just stop standing up for themselves, afraid of an argument. Then they'll say they prioritized family first, but there was never a reason they couldn't still make time for their own interests. It's like they just give up on themselves. My best friend is in this exact situation, he's miserable now and is on antidepressants. It's so sad, but it's also his own doing.

[sean_miller]

Originally Posted by walk18

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

sorry if you take offense, but there is a big difference between recreational "joe's" who play a few times a year and those passionate about the game.  It's not a knock.....it's just what separates the occasional golfer from dedicated players.(aside from handicap) There's nothing wrong with being a "JOE"....it's not his passion.  Maybe he likes to race cars or fish on his spare time.  (nothing wrong with that)

There are players and there are those who arent.....In a Joe's mind, he can't play this summer....gettin' married next year ya'know...he'll be too busy pleasing the wife 24/7 and all..ya know!! ......no time for golf....no time to leave the house!..LOL There is no way she will allow a 630am tee time saturday morning because she may need me?....LOL

You're either a player or you aren't...... there is no shame in being the occasional golfer.  Just don't pretend to be passionate if you don't really play the game regularly. There is no shame in being a JOE.....I'm just not that guy.  Believe it or not, it's possible to be a 1HC and have a family life too.....

I have to agree with this. If you care enough about the game, you'll find time to play, AND be a good parent, those things are not mutually exclusive. I've seen this happen to so many guys, they have kids, and the wife dictates everything, and they become miserable. They just stop standing up for themselves, afraid of an argument. Then they'll say they prioritized family first, but there was never a reason they couldn't still make time for their own interests. It's like they just give up on themselves. My best friend is in this exact situation, he's miserable now and is on antidepressants. It's so sad, but it's also his own doing.

I can't comment on your friend's mental state, but I doubt the root cause is not playing enough golf. That sounds like a plotline from a TV sitcom. I'm gonna go out on a limb and suggest people are confusing being passionate with being obssessed

[mymizunosrock]

I play every Saturday, pretty much without fail. I will usually play 9 on Thursday afternoons because I need to be at the golf club anyway, but that eased off a bit leading into xmas. My dad and I play 18 just about every Friday after lunch time. Im self employed,so I can play just about every day of the week if I wanted too, even if it is just 9 holes in the afternoon.

[walk18]

Originally Posted by sean_miller

I can't comment on your friend's mental state, but I doubt the root cause is not playing enough golf. That sounds like a plotline from a TV sitcom. I'm gonna go out on a limb and suggest people are confusing being passionate with being obssessed

Well the root cause is simply that he makes no time for himself, whether it's golf or whatever.. and I see that with a lot of people. All work, no play.

[nguyenex]

I play only once a month. It's difficult to squeeze out time when working full time.

[kcgolfa1]

Not enough, I only make it out a couple of times a month. :-(

[walk18]

Originally Posted by nguyenex

I play only once a month. It's difficult to squeeze out time when working full time.

Don't you get vacation time? Or you could play twilight or weekends. I work full time and play twice a week in-season.

[GlobalGolf]

With a 15 month-old girl I've only been able to find time to play about twice a month. And this has been going on for... well... 15 months. A speaker at a recent conference I attended started the talk with the question, "How many of you play golf?" About 50% of the room put their hands. Then he followed it up with, "How many of you play more now than you did a year ago?" About 90% of the hands went down. It seems like in addition to new responsibilities, there are external forces at work trying to keep us off the course.

[AmazingWhacker]

Originally Posted by sean_miller

I can't comment on your friend's mental state, but I doubt the root cause is not playing enough golf. That sounds like a plotline from a TV sitcom. I'm gonna go out on a limb and suggest people are confusing being passionate with being obssessed

Originally Posted by walk18

I have to agree with this. If you care enough about the game, you'll find time to play, AND be a good parent, those things are not mutually exclusive. I've seen this happen to so many guys, they have kids, and the wife dictates everything, and they become miserable. They just stop standing up for themselves, afraid of an argument. Then they'll say they prioritized family first, but there was never a reason they couldn't still make time for their own interests. It's like they just give up on themselves. My best friend is in this exact situation, he's miserable now and is on antidepressants. It's so sad, but it's also his own doing.

This is exactly what happened to me!  I used to play 4-5 times a week.  Then we had a baby and I dropped it down to once or twice a week.  Then my wife started making my life a living hell everytime I did something for myself so I just stopped.  Haven't golfed, fished or even watched what I wanted to on TV for about 10 months.  I've managed to avoid the anti-depressants so far but I just throw myself into work since that's about the only thing I do by myself that doesn't get complained about.

[BuckeyeNut]

It's possible to be married with a family and pursue personal interests too.    Having balance in life is essential to a healthy happy marriage/family life. Without it, you'll be miserable and your marriage will end in divorce.

I can make the argument for playing more golf to maintain a healthy family life and marriage...LOL

[gm4231e]

Not nearly enough since school started back.  Between work, after school activities with the kids, and cold weather returning I find myself thinking about getting out more than doing it.  I'm looking forward to the return of warmer weather.

[TourSpoon]

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

It's possible to be married with a family and pursue personal interests too.    Having balance in life is essential to a healthy happy marriage/family life. Without it, you'll be miserable and your marriage will end in divorce.

I can make the argument for playing more golf to maintain a healthy family life and marriage...LOL

I totally agree with this...the only difference was that I changed my interests from golf to other pursuits that took a little less time or that you could do after the kids went to sleep. Since I couldn't play and practice the way I wanted to, I took a hiatus and did other things that I enjoyed.

[SteelCitySlice]

Last year it was only a couple times a month.  This upcoming season I'm going to aim for twice a week...one twilight round after work and one early weekend round.

[sean_miller]

Originally Posted by TourSpoon

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

It's possible to be married with a family and pursue personal interests too.    Having balance in life is essential to a healthy happy marriage/family life. Without it, you'll be miserable and your marriage will end in divorce.

I can make the argument for playing more golf to maintain a healthy family life and marriage...LOL

I totally agree with this...the only difference was that I changed my interests from golf to other pursuits that took a little less time or that you could do after the kids went to sleep. Since I couldn't play and practice the way I wanted to, I took a hiatus and did other things that I enjoyed.

I might have take issue with insinuations that a person who chooses to spend time with his kids doing things other than golfing is somehow being manipulated and on the fast track to divorce.

[TourSpoon]

Quote:

Originally Posted by TourSpoon

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

It's possible to be married with a family and pursue personal interests too.    Having balance in life is essential to a healthy happy marriage/family life. Without it, you'll be miserable and your marriage will end in divorce.

I can make the argument for playing more golf to maintain a healthy family life and marriage...LOL

I totally agree with this...the only difference was that I changed my interests from golf to other pursuits that took a little less time or that you could do after the kids went to sleep. Since I couldn't play and practice the way I wanted to, I took a hiatus and did other things that I enjoyed.

Originally Posted by sean_miller

I might have take issue with insinuations that a person who chooses to spend time with his kids doing things other than golfing is somehow being manipulated and on the fast track to divorce.

OK, I can see your point and I should have said that I totally agree with the following:

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

It's possible to be married with a family and pursue personal interests too.    Having balance in life is essential to a healthy happy marriage/family life.

During the prime child raising years with my kids it became increasingly difficult to carve out time in the day for golf, especially when they started playing sports. I coached and volunteered and was there for all the games. I never wanted to be a dad who watched the games on video after the fact. However, I did have personal interests including getting advanced degrees, running, working out, etc. that I could do during the off times. Golf is very time consuming, has to be played in the daylight, and just didn't fit into the mix. Again, I didn't want to be a casual golfer either. I suppose that if my kids were not jocks and we were not tied up on the weekends and after school (or if they were remotely interested in golf) then it could have been different, but it wasn't and I don't regret a minute of it. Conversely, when they both went into high school, the sports started to become a weekday thing and it didn't require me to be there to coach or drive to practices. I still attend the games, but all of a sudden there is time for me to play and practice without giving anything up. I even tell my friends that have small children that you will never regret the time you invest with your children. Golf will always be there if you want it, but your children's youth won't be.

[BuckeyeNut]

Originally Posted by sean_miller

I might have take issue with insinuations that a person who chooses to spend time with his kids doing things other than golfing is somehow being manipulated and on the fast track to divorce.

Well said.....

If you don't play golf at least 4 times a week....oh nevermind...LOL

[RPMPIRE]

Let's hope I don't have to resort to this method in the future...

[sean_miller]

Originally Posted by TourSpoon

Quote:

Quote:

Originally Posted by TourSpoon

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

It's possible to be married with a family and pursue personal interests too.    Having balance in life is essential to a healthy happy marriage/family life. Without it, you'll be miserable and your marriage will end in divorce.

I can make the argument for playing more golf to maintain a healthy family life and marriage...LOL

I totally agree with this...the only difference was that I changed my interests from golf to other pursuits that took a little less time or that you could do after the kids went to sleep. Since I couldn't play and practice the way I wanted to, I took a hiatus and did other things that I enjoyed.

Originally Posted by sean_miller

I might have take issue with insinuations that a person who chooses to spend time with his kids doing things other than golfing is somehow being manipulated and on the fast track to divorce.

OK, I can see your point and I should have said that I totally agree with the following:

Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

It's possible to be married with a family and pursue personal interests too.    Having balance in life is essential to a healthy happy marriage/family life.

During the prime child raising years with my kids it became increasingly difficult to carve out time in the day for golf, especially when they started playing sports. I coached and volunteered and was there for all the games. I never wanted to be a dad who watched the games on video after the fact. However, I did have personal interests including getting advanced degrees, running, working out, etc. that I could do during the off times. Golf is very time consuming, has to be played in the daylight, and just didn't fit into the mix. Again, I didn't want to be a casual golfer either. I suppose that if my kids were not jocks and we were not tied up on the weekends and after school (or if they were remotely interested in golf) then it could have been different, but it wasn't and I don't regret a minute of it. Conversely, when they both went into high school, the sports started to become a weekday thing and it didn't require me to be there to coach or drive to practices. I still attend the games, but all of a sudden there is time for me to play and practice without giving anything up. I even tell my friends that have small children that you will never regret the time you invest with your children. Golf will always be there if you want it, but your children's youth won't be.

My wife gave me two prints for Christmas last year (among other things I've forgotten about). A large one for the living room and a smaller one for the office. Collages of photos of our daughter - photos I'd taken and ones she'd taken of the two of us doing fun stuff together. To someone else it's a nice snapshot of her at 3-4 years old, but in every picture we're having so much fun it's not hard to see why we didn't notice the camera. I know not everyone's experiences at home are as positive, but for me, I can't imagine trading those memories for the memories that would have been created while filling out 150 scorecards.