Gamesmanship / etiquette

[rustywedge]

I like to think that golf is a gentlemanly sport where etiquette takes precedence over gamesmanship.

A good friend who is very competitive and also a good player just can't help himself.

He is ok for the most part but whenever we are on the greens he invariably stands and fidgets at some point during the final Phase of my routine.

Commonly he will stand stock still somewhere in my field of vision until I'm about to pull the trigger.... At which point he will sharply crane his neck through 180 there is never anyone or anythiNg .... As he wears a peaked cap actions are Purely intended to break my train of thought and concentration. He will also strategically stand with his shadow across my line, behind my putter head and alsO cLose to the hole and then proceed to fidget as described earlier. In this instance I will break my routine ask him to move and then start afresh.

Any idEas how to  get the message through? I have asked several times but his competitive streak prevents him from behaving  properly such is his desire to win.

Any Suggestions  appreciated.

[Shorty]

Originally Posted by rustywedge

A good friend

Some friend.

[Ignorant]

This is a piece of cake!

Every time you feel distracted by him you stop your routine and start it all over. Just to reinforce the effect you should do this once in a while (and in the beginning quite often) even with no apparent reason. But make sure that after every restart of your routines you clearly say that you were distracted by his whereabouts/movements/noices/etc.

I guarantee he will learn his lesson pretty quickly or will stop playing with you. Both options are good for your golf ;-)

P.S. If this does not help, there is a plan B. Start doing the same to him...

[LuciusWooding]

Just stop golfing with him for a few weeks, then give him up for good.

[zeg]

"Dude, if I have to ask you to stand still or get your shadow off my line again, I'm out of here."

[zipazoid]

If he's a good friend just say dude knock it off. That's not how this game is played.

If he insists on continuing, just decline future offers to play together. If he asks why, just say, I can't play with you. You're too distracting to my game.

[Ernest Jones]

Just go all Bubba on him!

[rustywedge]

He normally plays other sports where distraction and gamesmanship are more acceptable - he just thinks golf is the same.

He knows that putting is one of my strengths and does what he can to put me off my game - did him no good yesterday - crushed him 5&4 - sank some bombs and kept him pretty quiet.

Just getting a bit tired of his antics - he isn't getting the hint so maybe I should do a Bubba - He is very thick skinned and maybe I just need to hammer the point home more forcefully.

[Elvisliveson]

Originally Posted by Ignorant

This is a piece of cake!

Every time you feel distracted by him you stop your routine and start it all over. Just to reinforce the effect you should do this once in a while (and in the beginning quite often) even with no apparent reason. But make sure that after every restart of your routines you clearly say that you were distracted by his whereabouts/movements/noices/etc.

Why not just simply say something to the guy instead of possibly ruining other groups time on the course by slowing things down "quite often" like that?

[Fourputt]

Originally Posted by Shorty

Some friend.

Amen!  He wouldn't be a friend of mine for long.

[rustywedge]

Originally Posted by Elvisliveson

Why not just simply say something to the guy instead of possibly ruining other groups time on the course by slowing things down "quite often" like that?

I think next time he asks if I want to play I will make it conditional that he doesn't pull any of his usual stunts on the green.

If he's not willing to accept those terms then that's fine - we don't play.

Win / Win

That might just do it.

[rustyredcab]

Originally Posted by rustywedge

He normally plays other sports where distraction and gamesmanship are more acceptable - he just thinks golf is the same.

...

That is a very charitable way to look at it -- and may be correct. In tennis, you can get into the other guy's head with a "nice serve" or some other comment. I used to say, "Thank you." when someone double faulted. Man did that drive them crazy. In football, it is not holding unless you get caught. Golf is different and perhaps, as his good friend, you should help him to understand that manners matter. You might be doing him a great favor. Imagine if he played business golf and pulled that bull. I took up golf for real in my 20's and mostly played for business at first. All that mattered was manners and being enjoyable to be around. I'm competitive as most anyone you'll meet. But that means I want to make my putt not distract you so you miss yours.

That scene in Caddie Shack where the guys yell, "Miss it!" is a joke -- not a Golf Channel lesson on how to win.

[boogielicious]

Good luck.  If he is a friend, he should stop.

[Yukari]

Easy solution.  Stop playing with him altogether.

I wouldn't put up with that kind of crap.  He's an a$$.

[TourSpoon]

Just stop golfing with him for a few weeks, then give him up for good.

Exactly...

[Ernest Jones]

I think your buddy is missing the point, golf is supposed to be played against the course and old man par. Other sports are played directly against your competitor and gamesmanship is acceptable and even an expected part of the game but in golf that's not really true. Even this past weekend, in a sense Bubba was competing with Rose (for example) but that's only superficial, in reality Bubba is competing against the golf courses as is Rose, whoever does the best against the course (and elements) wins the tourney. If some schmuck is f--king with you in your backstroke you aren't getting a fair shot at competing against the course and neither of you is going to have a score worth keeping, a score that reflects how you did against the course.

I bet your buddy doesn't tip the beer cart girl either!

[Rulesman]

Originally Posted by Ernest Jones

golf is supposed to be played against the course and old man par.

Golf originated as match play. Stroke play is a recent aberration which is why the rules have become more complicated.

[Fourputt]

Originally Posted by Ernest Jones

I think your buddy is missing the point, golf is supposed to be played against the course and old man par.

Consider match play.  That is golf in its original and purest form, and par has no bearing in match play.  It is strictly mano y mano.  All that matters is whether you finish each hole in fewer strokes than your opponent.  I've deliberately played for bogey many times when my opponent was in trouble and I knew that bogey would win the hole.

Stroke or medal play for an aggregate score is a relatively new iteration of the game.

But..... there is still no place even in match play for ignoring the precepts of etiquette.