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The Best (worst) Spelling and Grammar Errors Thread


dak4n6
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I haven't been able to read 67 pages of this thread but when I am asked how my grammar is, I tell them she is fine and lives in Kentucky. 

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Darrell Butler

Coach (me) to player, "Hey, what percentage of putts left short never go in?"  Player, "Coach, 100% of putts left short never go in."  Coach (me), "Exactly."  Player, "Coach what percentage of putts that go long never go in."  LOL!

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On 20/6/2012 1:31:34, Clambake said:

The following are all courtesy of  IIIIIsp1d3rIIIl.    It's hard to imagine a worse assault on the English language!    I highlighted some of my favorite misspellings.

 

 

You have to wonder when some students get to PhD level and still have to be coached on how to write a paragraph correctly.

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On 7/18/2012, 2:19:32, dak4n6 said:
Quote:

The sterotype golfer: a white old man who wears plaid, sweater vests, little hats with poppies on top, and is crabby. This driver wouldn't appear to fir that golfer. But it would, just like it fits me, just like it fits people who get paid to do what you all love. Don't get me wrong, I love plaid and sweater vests; I'm more classic in the looks department. So when you think this driver don't let your mind jump to "kids these days." If Rickie Fowler didn't look like hippie, then maybe people wouldn't see him with it and say, "What happened to golf." If ifs and buts were candy and nuts, every day would be Christmas, or Halloween in this case

 

What exactly is he saying?

He's basically saying the Sterotypical golfer is a retired gentleman who wears traditional golfing attire (such as plaid tousers, sleevless jumpers and flat cap) and is alway a little grumpy (crabby), basically us Brits :-D. However, the bit about the driver makes no sense at all. Ive read through that bit over and over and now i have a headache :pound:

Russ, from "sunny" Yorkshire = :-( 

In the bag: Driver: Ping G5 , Woods:Dunlop NZ9, 4 Hybrid: Tayormade Burner, 4-SW: Hippo Beast Bi-Metal , Wedges: Wilson 1200, Putter: Cleveland Smartsquare Blade, Ball: AD333

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So I'm gonna be ironic and use an emoticon to express my feelings towards an emoji being word of the year.

:doh:

http://blog.oxforddictionaries.com/2015/11/word-of-the-year-2015-emoji/

Quote

Oxford Dictionaries Word of the Year 2015 is…

tears-of-joy-emoji

That’s right – for the first time ever, the Oxford Dictionaries Word of the Year is a pictograph: ?, officially called the ‘Face with Tears of Joy’ emoji, though you may know it by other names. There were other strong contenders from a range of fields, outlined below, but ? was chosen as the ‘word’ that best reflected the ethos, mood, and preoccupations of 2015.

GET OFF MY LAWN!

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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  • 2 weeks later...
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Parking Lot by Jean Paul Sartre

CU1RfrMUAAABLnS.jpg

 

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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On November 17, 2015 at 2:29:48 AM, nevets88 said:

So I'm gonna be ironic and use an emoticon to express my feelings towards an emoji being word of the year.

:doh:

http://blog.oxforddictionaries.com/2015/11/word-of-the-year-2015-emoji/

GET OFF MY LAWN!

Face of tears of joy?  That's not how I use it, I use it as I'm laughing so hard I'm crying, but never thought of it as tears of joy.. Just two different things in my opinion.. Tears of joy are usually a drop or two, this one is more like a river.

:adams: / :tmade: / :edel: / :aimpoint: / :ecco: / :bushnell: / :gamegolf: / 

Eyad

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  • 1 month later...
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SV agreement

Screen Shot 2015-12-28 at 3.11.01 PM.png

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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2 hours ago, nevets88 said:

SV agreement

Screen Shot 2015-12-28 at 3.11.01 PM.png

Maybe he's a plural now!  (...he are a plural?)

Craig
What's in the :ogio: Silencer bag (on the :clicgear: cart)
Driver: :callaway: Razr Fit 10.5°  
5 Wood: :tmade: Burner  
Hybrid: :cobra: Baffler DWS 20°
Irons: :ping: G400 
Wedge: :ping: Glide 2.0 54° ES grind 
Putter: :heavyputter:  midweight CX2
:aimpoint:,  :bushnell: Tour V4

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22 hours ago, Missouri Swede said:

Maybe he's a plural now!  (...he are a plural?)

Dude is channeling Jorden Spieth (He who tends to use we a lot.) :-D Hey, if it wins him 2 majors, why not?

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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Anyone who can throw a 90+ fastball underwater isn't an MLB player. He's a superhero.

CHDS0srUkAEpxY2.jpg

 

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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11 hours ago, nevets88 said:

Anyone who can throw a 90+ fastball underwater isn't an MLB player. He's a superhero.

CHDS0srUkAEpxY2.jpg

 

Wow, that is one helluva typo. Wonder if someone got fired over that. 

And...yeah...anyone that can throw a 90+ mph baseball underwater is not to be f**ked with. Lol. I don't even think @MS256 could pull that one off!

Yours in earnest, Jason.
Call me Ernest, or EJ or Ernie.

PSA - "If you find yourself in a hole, STOP DIGGING!"

My Whackin' Sticks: :cleveland: 330cc 2003 Launcher 10.5*  :tmade: RBZ HL 3w  :nickent: 3DX DC 3H, 3DX RC 4H  :callaway: X-22 5-AW  :nike:SV tour 56* SW :mizuno: MP-T11 60* LW :bridgestone: customized TD-03 putter :tmade:Penta TP3   :aimpoint:

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7 minutes ago, Ernest Jones said:

Wow, that is one helluva typo. Wonder if someone got fired over that. 

And...yeah...anyone that can throw a 90+ mph baseball underwater is not to be f**ked with. Lol. I don't even think @MS256 could pull that one off!

Alternative typos:

Amorphous pitcher makes debut

Ambiguous pitcher makes debut

Ambivalent pitcher makes debut

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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21 hours ago, nevets88 said:

Anyone who can throw a 90+ fastball underwater isn't an MLB player. He's a superhero.

CHDS0srUkAEpxY2.jpg

 

That made me snort..

Actually, it took my old brain a couple seconds to recall what the correct term was. How did someone who confuses 'amphibious' with 'ambidextrous' ever get hired as a journalist...

dak4n6

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22 hours ago, nevets88 said:

Anyone who can throw a 90+ fastball underwater isn't an MLB player. He's a superhero.

CHDS0srUkAEpxY2.jpg

 

Does this really belong in this thread though?  One can be both amphibious and ambidextrous, right?  How do we know that the title is incorrect, hmmmmmmmmmm?? :-D

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On January 4, 2016 at 8:21 PM, nevets88 said:

Anyone who can throw a 90+ fastball underwater isn't an MLB player. He's a superhero.

CHDS0srUkAEpxY2.jpg

 

 

2 hours ago, dak4n6 said:

That made me snort..

Actually, it took my old brain a couple seconds to recall what the correct term was. How did someone who confuses 'amphibious' with 'ambidextrous' ever get hired as a journalist...

Whatta ya bet it was an autocorrect by a computer?  "note to self: don't typeset the headline from my cellphone ever again"

Craig
What's in the :ogio: Silencer bag (on the :clicgear: cart)
Driver: :callaway: Razr Fit 10.5°  
5 Wood: :tmade: Burner  
Hybrid: :cobra: Baffler DWS 20°
Irons: :ping: G400 
Wedge: :ping: Glide 2.0 54° ES grind 
Putter: :heavyputter:  midweight CX2
:aimpoint:,  :bushnell: Tour V4

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28 minutes ago, Missouri Swede said:

 

Whatta ya bet it was an autocorrect by a computer?  "note to self: don't typeset the headline from my cellphone ever again"

Guessing overconfidence, overreliance, on the content management system. And maybe an assist from our public school system.

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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10 hours ago, Missouri Swede said:

Whatta ya bet it was an autocorrect by a computer?  "note to self: don't typeset the headline from my cellphone ever again"

MSwede you really must be older than dirt. You realize most young'ns have no idea what typesetting is? I remember in HS we actually had a printing press and we had to pick out every letter and manually put them into the press to crank out our HS newspaper. Man, you dragged that memory out of the dim recesses...

dak4n6

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2 hours ago, Elmer said:

As to who I would vote for, probably Bernie.
If it comes down to Clinton vs Republican. Than Clinton.

It's probably wrong of me, but I judge the intelligence of people a little bit when they type things like "than" or "you're" when they mean to say "then" or "your."

Erik J. Barzeski —  I knock a ball. It goes in a gopher hole. 🏌🏼‍♂️
Director of Instructor Development, 5 Simple Keys®/Golf Evolution • Owner, The Sand Trap .com • AuthorLowest Score Wins • Golf Digest "Best Young Teachers in America" 2016-17 • "Best in State" 2017-20 • WNY Section PGA Teacher of the Year 2019 • Penn-State Behrend Head Coach • • • • • • • • • • :aimpoint: :edel: :true_linkswear:

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