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I am calling you out as a non-golfer IF.........................


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YOU.....yes YOU!!   I am calling you out as a non-golfer if you get to your cart after completing a hole, and YOU proceed to sit in your cart or dilly dally with your bag for longer than 10 seconds before driving the hell away!!     We'll call it the buckeyenut 10 second rule!!  LOL

Dropped food gets a 5 second rule......I give you a count to 10 to "move on" after finishing a golf hole!!

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You are making a real ass of yourself lately. You are a non-golfer if you can not treat fellow golfers with the respect due to them, regardless of their score or the CR of the course on which they sh

Not me! A golf ball with a demonstrated affinity for the water has a horrible character flaw that cannot be changed.  It should never be trusted again!

I made a 12 on a par-3 once......with NO PENALTY STROKES!

YOU.....yes YOU!!   I am calling you out as a non-golfer if you get to your cart after completing a hole, and YOU proceed to sit in your cart or dilly dally with your bag for longer than 10 seconds before driving the hell away!!     We'll call it the buckeyenut 10 second rule!!  LOL

Dropped food gets a 5 second rule......I give you a count to 10 to "move on" after finishing a golf hole!!

Wow, I've been behind the "cart/bag fumbler" before too. It's like waiting for tumbleweed to pass by while sitting on a rocking chair. :tumble:

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Wow, I've been behind the "cart/bag fumbler" before too. It's like waiting for tumbleweed to pass by while sitting on a rocking chair.

Yes.......if waiting for a group to finish playing isn't bad enough, now we wait for them to chit-chat sitting in the cart before they get the hell out of the way.

This leads to the next type of NON_GOLFER!!

If  you hit into a green before the group you are following has a chance to safely leave the area................YOU ARE A NON GOLFER!

I've nearly been hit walking off a green barely 5 paces off the putting surface before..........this is trouble.  I had an ugly confrontation once on the course due to this.....my group was close behind and waiting on the group in front of us all day.  The group following us kept hitting to the green before we were 5-10 feet away still walking off the green.....The incident happened after the 3rd time we had to duck/take cover walking off the green.  By this time, we were FKN pissed!!!!!

We learned they were ignorant fool non-golfers oblivious to what they were doing.  They weren't even in a hurry or trying to rush us...............they were simply clueless non-golfing fools in need of an education.

I've paired up as a single before with guys like this too.   I asked them to stop and wait until the green is properly cleared,  and this made perfect sense to them.

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You are a non golfer if you use your putter from the tee box or anywhere save the green complex. Even if you can drive the par 3's with it. This guy could get it up over pine trees.
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YOU.....yes YOU!!   I am calling you out as a non-golfer if you get to your cart after completing a hole, and YOU proceed to sit in your cart or dilly dally with your bag for longer than 10 seconds before driving the hell away!!     We'll call it the buckeyenut 10 second rule!!  LOL

Dropped food gets a 5 second rule......I give you a count to 10 to "move on" after finishing a golf hole!!


This happened to me on #18 Saturday.

The fart-knockers knew I was there. No. 18 is relatively short par-4 with a big elevated tee. In other words, I can possibly drive the green. They saunter off the green. One of them screws around with his bag.  Then they sit in the cart 10 yards from the green to add up their scorecard. I'm standing on top of the hill with my driver across my shoulder. One of em looks back and up the hill ... and ... nothing.

Five minutes go by and they must have finally added it all up and they move off. I slice my drive and am fuming, but hit a terrific wedge to 1 foot and got my birdie anyway.

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  • 4 months later...

I might call you out as a non-golfer if you tell everybody online that you shot a "XX" (the score itself is not relevant) without also sharing the CR from the tees you played!!

Next.....

LOL

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Quote:

Originally Posted by BuckeyeNut

YOU.....yes YOU!!   I am calling you out as a non-golfer if you get to your cart after completing a hole, and YOU proceed to sit in your cart or dilly dally with your bag for longer than 10 seconds before driving the hell away!!     We'll call it the buckeyenut 10 second rule!!  LOL

Dropped food gets a 5 second rule......I give you a count to 10 to "move on" after finishing a golf hole!!

Wow, I've been behind the "cart/bag fumbler" before too. It's like waiting for tumbleweed to pass by while sitting on a rocking chair.

You aren't a real golfer if you are the guy who parks his trolley in front or on the wrong side of the green and makes you wait for him to saunter over, put away his putter, sometimes mark his score, then finally stroll across in front of you toward the next tee.... AND HE DOES IT ON EVERY FREAKING HOLE!!!!  That makes me as crazy as the cart dawdlers.

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You aren't a real golfer if you are the guy who parks his trolley in front or on the wrong side of the green and makes you wait for him to saunter over, put away his putter, sometimes mark his score, then finally stroll across in front of you toward the next tee.... AND HE DOES IT ON EVERY FREAKING HOLE!!!!  That makes me as crazy as the cart dawdlers.

You have to wonder if they are really that unaware of what's going on around them, or if they just get off on pissing other people off. All they have to do is get to the next tee box before entering their score. It's really not that hard.

I wonder if these are the same folks who pull up to an ATM with a line of cars behind them and then (and only then) decide to take their card out, fiddle-fart around doing who knows what in their car, and after finishing up their 5 minute transaction, spend another minute to put their crap away before slowwwwwly putting their vehicles in gear and driving off
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So then what's the difference in being a "non-golfer" and just a novice golfer? Because if being a novice and not perfectly conforming to every single niggling bit of etiquette is all it takes to make you an a-hole, that's a little problematic for those new to the sport.

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So then what's the difference in being a "non-golfer" and just a novice golfer? Because if being a novice and not perfectly conforming to every single niggling bit of etiquette is all it takes to make you an a-hole, that's a little problematic for those new to the sport.


I think we all make etiquette mistakes while learning the game and I think folks who have played a long time have quite a bit of tolerance towards us. The a-hole label has more to do with the over-the-top inconsideration other's show when they've been playing long enough to know better.

As far as the rest of the thread, a lot of this is tongue-in-cheek joking about our own golfing habits. If you read further back in the thread you'll find a few references to a ball retrieval tool, for example. We joke that you're not a real golfer if you have one of these, yet many of us do.

I think most of us never intended for any of this to be insulting.

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So then what's the difference in being a "non-golfer" and just a novice golfer? Because if being a novice and not perfectly conforming to every single niggling bit of etiquette is all it takes to make you an a-hole, that's a little problematic for those new to the sport.

Moxie,

This thread is a fun rant.............nothing more.  Please take it with a grain of salt.

My regular group has the first tee time every Sat & Sun during prime season so we control our own destiny.  My 4-some plays 18 holes in about 3hrs flat....3hrs 15mins.   Pace of play never an issue unless we play 27 or 36.   I play a lot more than just weekend golf.   I also play at least 2 weekday evenings and I pair up when I do this.  I honestly enjoy playing with all golfers whether novice or accomplished.   The only real killer is playing with that person that causes my group to fall off the pace......and not keeping up with the group we follow.    If we are keeping up, I can forgive the vast majority of things discussed in this thread.    Just sayin'.....

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Oh, I didn't take it as an insult. Just really wondered if there is a perception on the course when you see someone doing something "wrong" if there is a difference in how you feel toward someone who is a clear novice, and you answered that.

I had a lot of misconceptions about golf which this forum has done a great job of blowing out of the water, most notably my firm belief that golf is too expensive for the average person. Also that golf is a game for snobs. I guess that's the redneck in me. This forum has blown that one out of the water too.

I find that my worst mistake on the golf course the first time was being in people's way. In their "line" or casting shadows and whatnot. It takes time to learn to be aware of yourself in relation to others and the sun and whatnot. I'm sure it becomes instinctive in time.

I'm just so jazzed to get to play again next month. Forum member @zipazoid is my best pal and he's taking me to play the PGA Short Course at Port St. Lucie, so my meager collection of sticks is all I need for that and no rentals required. We're gonna play all day long and I know I will learn a lot about etiquette and pace and all that. But still I worry about being able to have a good time but also not offending the more experienced people.

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I'm just so jazzed to get to play again next month. Forum member @zipazoid is my best pal and he's taking me to play the PGA Short Course at Port St. Lucie, so my meager collection of sticks is all I need for that and no rentals required. We're gonna play all day long and I know I will learn a lot about etiquette and pace and all that. But still I worry about being able to have a good time but also not offending the more experienced people.

Ya Better guard your clubs closely!  If you leave one lay on the ground, he believes in finders keepers!!  LOL

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Ya Better guard your clubs closely!  If you leave one lay on the ground, he believes in finders keepers!!  LOL

I know that, and I think I stuck up for him on that. Keep up with your crap!

Besides, he can't pilfer my clubs. He's a lefty.

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@Moxie Dawn You'll be fine. I'll give you 6 months before you'll be posting examples in this thread.

But you have given another idea...

You're not a real golfer if you wear anything "camo" on the course (which I do on a regular basis, this is Northern Michigan after all).

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You're not a real golfer if you wear anything "camo" on the course (which I do on a regular basis, this is Northern Michigan after all).

You reminded me of BOO!!!   He wore a long sleeve cammo Under Armor under his golf shirt, and people wondered if he had arm-sleeve TATS. LOL   Cammo...no less!!  Hahaha

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Ya Better guard your clubs closely!  If you leave one lay on the ground, he believes in finders keepers!!  LOL

Man, some things just never die. :-P

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