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Jason, Amanda Dufner Getting a Divorce


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Top Reasons for divorce in America. Young age Financial Premarital cohabitation Premarital childbearing and or pregnancy No religious affiliation Parents’ divorce Insecurity I don’t see “my spouse posted several revealing pictures on the net” as a reason.

See "insecurity".

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I'm angry because this thread is full of sexist garbage, and I find that disgusting. The conclusion he is deriving has no basis in actual, established fact, but in some sort of cultural insecurity and

I should make a card game called jump to conclusions. Moderator draws a card that has a scenario described on it, and your objective will be to come up with a technically sane, but baseless conclusion

I'm talking about adults, not kids. I am also extra grumpy because it's pouring rain on a Saturday morning and I should be at golf.

See "insecurity".

I'm not going to venture into the clinical definition of insecurity as it relates to an individual in a marriage. I will just say it is not applicable.

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I'm not going to venture into the clinical definition of insecurity as it relates to an individual in a marriage. I will just say it is not applicable.

So now you're a psychiatrist too? Good to know.

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It was probably hard for Jason to deal with Amanda's pics to the world as he knew she was out, way out of his league. He was the one probably floating the tab on those vacations with those "friends" and seeing her frolic with hard bodied guys may have gave him a little trouble. Especially with his belly hanging over his suit and dried tobacco spit on his chin.
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Top Reasons for divorce in America.

Young age

Financial

Premarital cohabitation

Premarital childbearing and or pregnancy

No religious affiliation

Parents’ divorce

Insecurity

I don’t see “my spouse posted several revealing pictures on the net” as a reason.

I don't see infidelity on that list either.  Those apparently are just the top reasons, not all the reasons.  There are as many reasons to get divorced as there are divorces.

To really take this thread into the gutter, that Kardashian skank divorced Bruce Jenner because she didn't want to be married to a woman.

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Top Reasons for divorce in America.

Young age

Financial

Premarital cohbitation

Premarital childbearing and or pregnancy

No religious affiliation

Parents’ divorce

Insecurity

I don’t see “my spouse posted several revealing pictures on the net” as a reason.

I'm struggling to see many of these as a reason for any divorce

They may be contributing factors in a complex scenario, but reasons? Really? How is "p remarital cohabitation" or "no religious affiliation" a reason for divorce? You may as well say "driveways" or "apples".

What is the source?

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Methinks you guys have been watching too many courtroom TV shows. These are published reasons. If you care to note, the list also excludes abuse (mental, physical or both). Think of these above-listed reasons as the "core" reasons. Remember, it's these "core" reasons that remain as underlying factors resulting in behavior such as infidelity and abuse. And believe it not, abuse and infidelity are often forgiven or overlooked for years by a spouse for the sake of children, or for the spouse's fear of splitting and being alone.
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A high divorce rate is a good thing.  It's a sign that we've advanced as a culture and shed the stigma of divorce.  The alternative is to turn back the clock fifty years, where people stayed miserable and married due to societal pressure.  Oftentimes to abusive partners.  And their children suffered far more growing up in a loveless environment than they would have with separate households.

I'd say half the couples I know are happily married.  Roughly 25% aren't, but are still hoping to salvage the relationship.  Best wishes to them.  Another 25% should get divorced yesterday.  So in my mind, the divorce rate needs to keep climbing.

I'm making this post only because it bothers me when somebody points out the divorce rate as if it's a bad thing.  Some kind of "deteriorating family values" bullshit.

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A high divorce rate is a good thing.  It's a sign that we've advanced as a culture and shed the stigma of divorce.  The alternative is to turn back the clock fifty years, where people stayed miserable and married due to societal pressure.  Oftentimes to abusive partners.  And their children suffered far more growing up in a loveless environment than they would have with separate households.   I'd say half the couples I know are happily married.  Roughly 25% aren't, but are still hoping to salvage the relationship.  Best wishes to them.  Another 25% should get divorced yesterday.  So in my mind, the divorce rate needs to keep climbing. I'm making this post only because it bothers me when somebody points out the divorce rate as if it's a bad thing.  Some kind of "deteriorating family values" bullshit.

I'm onboard with you here in theory, and agree on your numbers. I look at it this way. Maybe we should be looking at marriage BEFORE making the leap. There should be a universal questionnaire or survey that is offered to measure the compatibility of couples who decide that marriage is the next step. At least seeing some real numbers or results in black and white might affirm that the two are either really good or really bad for one another. The results would draw a line in the sand, per se. One caveat, the questionnaire should be designed and created by those who have been married 10, 20 and 30 years. This would provide a real "taste" of marriage for people thinking of hitching. Re: Jason The way he slapped her on the can after that victory was downright insulting to the viewing public and to women in general. It was totally out of place for Sunday afternoon Golf TV. Clearly, Jason’s concept of an ideal wife or lifelong partner was critically distorted, probably by his father, society or a combination of both. If he entered that marriage as a kneejerk reaction from the reptilian portion of the brain, using his fame and fortune to attract Amanda - then shame on him. If she bought into his BS - shame on her.

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Top Reasons for divorce in America.

Young age

Financial

Premarital cohabitation

Premarital childbearing and or pregnancy

No religious affiliation

Parents’ divorce

Insecurity

I don’t see “my spouse posted several revealing pictures on the net” as a reason.

These are published reasons. If you care to note, the list also excludes abuse (mental, physical or both). Think of these above-listed reasons as the "core" reasons. Remember, it's these "core" reasons that remain as underlying factors resulting in behavior such as infidelity and abuse.

Well, it simply doesn't make sense.  Getting married too young (i.e. the person changes and grows in a different direction from their spouse) is valid.  Financial stress is valid.  The next three on your list don't seem like "core" reasons why two people who have decided to get married would later get divorced.  "My wife drinks too much, goes out all the time, and hooks up with other guys.  I should have known this would happen when we decided to live together before marriage..."

I'm guessing the "published" reasons are the result of a study (or publication) sponsored by some religious entity.

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Well, it simply doesn't make sense.  Getting married too young (i.e. the person changes and grows in a different direction from their spouse) is valid.  Financial stress is valid.  The next three on your list don't seem like "core" reasons why two people who have decided to get married would later get divorced.  "My wife drinks too much, goes out all the time, and hooks up with other guys.  I should have known this would happen when we decided to live together before marriage..." I'm guessing the "published" reasons are the result of a study (or publication) sponsored by some religious entity.

They are published reasons, just passing along the data. Re: These three Premarital cohabitation Premarital childbearing and or pregnancy No religious affiliation I interpret the above-listed reasons as follows: Those who do not cohabitate prior, those who mutually decide to procreate and those who share religion tend to have longer and more successful marriages. As far as " My wife drinks too much, goes out all the time, and hooks up with other guys", I would label that as a behavioral response issue, usually tied to a core reason.

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I have a hard time believing that premarital cohabitation is detrimental to a marriage's longevity. That sounds like church sponsored claptrap to me.
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I interpret the above-listed reasons as follows:

Those who do not cohabitate prior, those who mutually decide to procreate and those who share religion tend to have longer and more successful marriages.

Well, in the layman's view, that is a pre-judged diagnosis that overstates the importance of traditional religious views.  Your "interpretation" gives it away, as it contains the conclusion that no people who have a child outside of marriage have made a "mutual decision" to procreate.  You could just as easily state that those who are good communicators, understand their spouse's love language, and are clean/tidy people tend to have longer and more successful marriages (and none of those factors presuppose that you must have traditional views on religion/marriage to have a successful marriage).

I call those factors biased.

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Top Reasons for divorce in America.

Young age

Financial

Premarital cohabitation

Premarital childbearing and or pregnancy

No religious affiliation

Parents’ divorce

Insecurity

I don’t see “my spouse posted several revealing pictures on the net” as a reason.

From actual studies, here are some of the top reasons for a divorce. From Austin-Institute for the Study of Family and Culture

Reasons for women to divorce,

Emotional Abuse, Spouse unresponsive to needs, Spouse Immaturity, Infidelity, alcohol or drug problems, tired of making the marriage work

Reasons for men to divorce,

Tired of making the marriage work, Infidelity, Spouse unresponsive to needs, spouse immaturity, married too young, Different financial priorities/spending patterns.

They are published reasons, just passing along the data.

Published doesn't mean correct. Anyone can take a poll and publish it.

I have a hard time believing that premarital cohabitation is detrimental to a marriage's longevity. That sounds like church sponsored claptrap to me.

I agree. Those all look highly conservative and religious biases reasons.

Though I could agree that those who tend to be highly religious might stay together more because of stigma of being divorced and being religious. Guilt and peer pressure are highly influencing factors when it comes for a person to decide of they should divorce or not if they are very religious in a religion that highly frowns upon divorce. Basically they rather suffer through a bad marriage then have the guilt and shame of going throw a divorce.

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I have a hard time believing that premarital cohabitation is detrimental to a marriage's longevity. That sounds like church sponsored claptrap to me.

Totally agree.  I've been married 29 years this summer an lived with my wife for a year before marriage.

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Totally agree.  I've been married 29 years this summer an lived with my wife for a year before marriage.

Congratulations!!

Though, for the purposes of this discussion, anecdote isn't really important.  But seriously, thumbs up for a long, happy, and healthy marriage!

Published doesn't mean correct. Anyone can take a poll and publish it.

Though I could agree that those who tend to be highly religious might stay together more because of stigma of being divorced and being religious. Guilt and peer pressure are highly influencing factors when it comes for a person to decide of they should divorce or not if they are very religious in a religion that highly frowns upon divorce. Basically they rather suffer through a bad marriage then have the guilt and shame of going throw a divorce.

Which begs another point:  success of a marriage cannot be measured solely in years.  My parents stayed married for nearly 40 years.  They hated each other for the last 20.  They are actually still married, but decided to separate because they didn't want to die miserable.

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