Embarrassing moments...come clean here...

[rkim291968]

I think we have a winner!  

I love whiffing, best part of my long game.

I say whiff it. Whiff it good.  ... Now whiff it into shape.  Shape it up.  Get straight.  Go forward. .... To whiff it.  Well, whiff it good.

My another embarrassing moment?  Very common one that you all may have done it countless times.   On a par 5 hole, I lay up  my tee shot with 3H perfectly, hit an equally perfect 2nd shot, then hit it into a bunker for my 3rd.   The ball is sitting on a perfect lie and I am thinking this will be either a par or bogey at the worst.   I hit my bunker shot and it hits the lip (1 inch from clearing it) and the ball rolls down to the same place in the divot I've just made.  I hit it again, hits the same lip and rolls down to the similar area.   I hit it again, HITS THE SAME LIP for the 3rd time in a row.   I hit it again, and you guessed it.   I hit the same effing lip for the 4 the time.   I.e, I repeated the same bunker shot 4 straight times, hit the same lip (inch from clearing it) 4 straight times.   Meanwhile, the stranger I got paired up is looking down at me from the top of the bunker probably thinking why can't he just throw it out for the sake of the group?  

Yes, I got the d**n ball out on my 5th try but it sailed 30 yards across the green in deep rough. Sigh.

[Gator Hazard]

I say whiff it. Whiff it good.  ... Now whiff it into shape.  Shape it up.  Get straight.  Go forward. .... To whiff it.  Well, whiff it good.

My another embarrassing moment?  Very common one that you all may have done it countless times.   On a par 5 hole, I lay up  my tee shot with 3H perfectly, hit an equally perfect 2nd shot, then hit it into a bunker for my 3rd.   The ball is sitting on a perfect lie and I am thinking this will be either a par or bogey at the worst.   I hit my bunker shot and it hits the lip (1 inch from clearing it) and the ball rolls down to the same place in the divot I've just made.  I hit it again, hits the same lip and rolls down to the similar area.   I hit it again, HITS THE SAME LIP for the 3rd time in a row.   I hit it again, and you guessed it.   I hit the same effing lip for the 4 the time.   I.e, I repeated the same bunker shot 4 straight times, hit the same lip (inch from clearing it) 4 straight times.   Meanwhile, the stranger I got paired up is looking down at me from the top of the bunker probably thinking why can't he just throw it out for the sake of the group?  

Yes, I got the d**n ball out on my 5th try but it sailed 30 yards across the green in deep rough. Sigh.

Yup, done that.  I actually don't mind playing out of traps unless the sand is really hard or is really dry it suits my cruddy golf swing I guess(out here in Florida they use that really soft, fluffy beach sand that just sprays everywhere).  When it is really dry it can take me a few whacks and then typically I do that too.  More often mine looks like this:  failed attempt at getting ball out of sand trap take one, take two.  Still nowhere, angry take three (you WILL get out of the sandtrap this time ball!!!  Aaaaarrgh!!!!), send ball into bunker on other side of the green, repeat.........

Edited October 23, 2015 by Gator Hazard

[Pretzel]

Would it be appropriate to post an embarrassing moment that wasn't my own here? I have a pretty good one from when I was working at a golf course when a bachelor's party came to the course...

[Gator Hazard]

Would it be appropriate to post an embarrassing moment that wasn't my own here? I have a pretty good one from when I was working at a golf course when a bachelor's party came to the course...

You have my support! Let the creative juices flow....

Edited October 23, 2015 by Gator Hazard

[Valleygolfer]

Would it be appropriate to post an embarrassing moment that wasn't my own here? I have a pretty good one from when I was working at a golf course when a bachelor's party came to the course...

I think it is imperative.

[Psyber]

Would it be appropriate to post an embarrassing moment that wasn't my own here? I have a pretty good one from when I was working at a golf course when a bachelor's party came to the course...

[Pretzel]

Alright, I'll post it and if a moderator comes later and finds it to be inappropriate I'm okay with it being deleted.

I was working outside services, cleaning and lining up carts mostly, when a party bus pulls up and about 20 people all pile out into the clubhouse. My course is one of the ones with a "footgolf" course (kicking soccer balls into oversized holes along the side of the regular course), and they came out each holding a soccer ball and I helped them get carts. Being that it was a Tuesday afternoon, it was pretty slow so I talked with the bus driver for a couple minutes to find out that the group was a bachelor's party. I went out to pick the range (I try to clean-pick it when it's slow to make it easier when they have to really clean pick it for mowing) and I was out there for maybe an hour when it started to get weird.

I see a cart tearing towards me in the middle of the driving range, so I stop and get out to see what the guy wants. He's pretty clearly drunk, not even capable of driving a golf cart in a straight line, but he gets to me and reaches in his pocket to grab something. He stumbles over to me and tells me, "We only have the bus rented for another hour and a half, and we need to get to Denver." (We were about an hour from Denver) "I need you to help me round everyone up to leave." As he says this he stuffs what he took out of his pocket into my hand, which turns out to be a wad of about 20 $1 bills. I jump into the cart and get the information of where his group is on the course, and we go tearing off. He pulls out more money from his pocket and tells me he will give me more for each group we gather.

As we get to the first group I realize that the ladies with the party were obviously not regular acquaintances of the men. I say this because they were, at best, half dressed by the time we went to collect the party to leave. The guy in the cart with me yells at the group to head in to the clubhouse, then turns to me and starts yelling, "Drive over there! I want to slap her @$$!" Since he's shoving money into my pocket as he says it, I acquiesce to his request and he does as he promised, before yelling at me to do the same. Slightly uncomfortable with where the situation is going, I refuse and we drive on to the next group while the guy ribs on me for not doing it. We get to the second group and the guy yells at the group to go in. As we pass, he yells for the girls to flash us, which they do, and we move on to collect the final group as the girl pulls out more money and hands it to me.

This is where it gets even weirder. As we pull up to the third group, I notice that two of the men are completely naked and one of them is urinating in the rough. The leader in my cart yells at them to move in, but tells me to stop and jumps out of the cart when he sees the two guys. The two naked guys are now in the cart driving towards the clubhouse, and the leader of the group makes a flying superman leap to land across their laps as they start to do donuts around my cart. After a lap or two the leader jumps off and back into my cart, yelling for the others to race us. He turns to me and says, "If we beat the others back to the bus, I'll give you the rest of the cash in my hand." We go tearing across the course, and I take the little used maintenance path that provides a more direct shortcut to the clubhouse and parking lot. The other carts follow and start bumping my cart to try and jostle me off the path into the weeds. I end up beating them when they swerve to hit me again and spin out on the loose dirt path, and the guy in the cart with me hands me a wad of money before running onto the bus followed by the rest of the people.

The bus leaves, and I'm left with 6 carts scattered across the parking lot where the group left them. In cleaning out the carts I find four pairs of pants, two pairs of briefs (from the naked guys), two sets of car keys, three bras, five shirts, and a pair of panties along with many, many bottles of liquor. The person in the clubhouse had come out to help me clean up after the people, and we ended up laughing pretty hard the whole time we were emptying the carts. All told I ended up with about $40-50 cash from the guy and an interesting story to tell.

[Calvin]

The first hole on the course I play regularly now is a dogleg right, around a tree that obscures second part of the hole. The starter always holds up groups on the tee to make sure the coast is clear. One time when I first started playing the course, I did not see the starter, but waited for the group in front (father and son) to get around the dogleg to the point I could not see them, then hit my drive. Instantly after striking my ball, the two re-appeared in view as they walked back slightly to pick up clubs. Naturally, my drive sliced to the dogleg instead of left fairway, as they walked back into it. Calling "fore" seemed so pathetic.  Profuse apologies, but years later I'm not sure they have really forgotten. Lesson learned - always wait for the starter to clear before hitting.  

Edited October 23, 2015 by Calvin

[ncarlsongolf]

In a junior tournament a kid hit a ball that came and landed next to us on the next tee box,  he had been hitting into us all day.  So i simply teed it up and sent it back at him.  Buzzed his tower pretty good, but looking back on it now it wasn't my finest moment.

 

 

[Gator Hazard]

Alright, I'll post it and if a moderator comes later and finds it to be inappropriate I'm okay with it being deleted.

I was working outside services, cleaning and lining up carts mostly, when a party bus pulls up and about 20 people all pile out into the clubhouse. My course is one of the ones with a "footgolf" course (kicking soccer balls into oversized holes along the side of the regular course), and they came out each holding a soccer ball and I helped them get carts. Being that it was a Tuesday afternoon, it was pretty slow so I talked with the bus driver for a couple minutes to find out that the group was a bachelor's party. I went out to pick the range (I try to clean-pick it when it's slow to make it easier when they have to really clean pick it for mowing) and I was out there for maybe an hour when it started to get weird.

I see a cart tearing towards me in the middle of the driving range, so I stop and get out to see what the guy wants. He's pretty clearly drunk, not even capable of driving a golf cart in a straight line, but he gets to me and reaches in his pocket to grab something. He stumbles over to me and tells me, "We only have the bus rented for another hour and a half, and we need to get to Denver." (We were about an hour from Denver) "I need you to help me round everyone up to leave." As he says this he stuffs what he took out of his pocket into my hand, which turns out to be a wad of about 20 $1 bills. I jump into the cart and get the information of where his group is on the course, and we go tearing off. He pulls out more money from his pocket and tells me he will give me more for each group we gather.

As we get to the first group I realize that the ladies with the party were obviously not regular acquaintances of the men. I say this because they were, at best, half dressed by the time we went to collect the party to leave. The guy in the cart with me yells at the group to head in to the clubhouse, then turns to me and starts yelling, "Drive over there! I want to slap her @$$!" Since he's shoving money into my pocket as he says it, I acquiesce to his request and he does as he promised, before yelling at me to do the same. Slightly uncomfortable with where the situation is going, I refuse and we drive on to the next group while the guy ribs on me for not doing it. We get to the second group and the guy yells at the group to go in. As we pass, he yells for the girls to flash us, which they do, and we move on to collect the final group as the girl pulls out more money and hands it to me.

This is where it gets even weirder. As we pull up to the third group, I notice that two of the men are completely naked and one of them is urinating in the rough. The leader in my cart yells at them to move in, but tells me to stop and jumps out of the cart when he sees the two guys. The two naked guys are now in the cart driving towards the clubhouse, and the leader of the group makes a flying superman leap to land across their laps as they start to do donuts around my cart. After a lap or two the leader jumps off and back into my cart, yelling for the others to race us. He turns to me and says, "If we beat the others back to the bus, I'll give you the rest of the cash in my hand." We go tearing across the course, and I take the little used maintenance path that provides a more direct shortcut to the clubhouse and parking lot. The other carts follow and start bumping my cart to try and jostle me off the path into the weeds. I end up beating them when they swerve to hit me again and spin out on the loose dirt path, and the guy in the cart with me hands me a wad of money before running onto the bus followed by the rest of the people.

The bus leaves, and I'm left with 6 carts scattered across the parking lot where the group left them. In cleaning out the carts I find four pairs of pants, two pairs of briefs (from the naked guys), two sets of car keys, three bras, five shirts, and a pair of panties along with many, many bottles of liquor. The person in the clubhouse had come out to help me clean up after the people, and we ended up laughing pretty hard the whole time we were emptying the carts. All told I ended up with about $40-50 cash from the guy and an interesting story to tell.

You know its going to be worth a read when it starts off with "Im okay with it being deleted".  Now THATS a golf story! Thank you for sharing.

 

[Gatsby1923]

On a par three I landed in a green side bunker on a postage stamp sized green. I never get to practice bunker shots so I was rusty... Well I had a great hit and contact and sent the ball up into the air... and into the bunker on the other side of the green... Then in that bunker I didn't get it up and bounced it off a wooden retaining wall in into my head...  The groundskeeper was watching me and couldn't stop laughing.

[WillM]

Alright, I'll post it and if a moderator comes later and finds it to be inappropriate I'm okay with it being deleted.

I was working outside services, cleaning and lining up carts mostly, when a party bus pulls up and about 20 people all pile out into the clubhouse. My course is one of the ones with a "footgolf" course (kicking soccer balls into oversized holes along the side of the regular course), and they came out each holding a soccer ball and I helped them get carts. Being that it was a Tuesday afternoon, it was pretty slow so I talked with the bus driver for a couple minutes to find out that the group was a bachelor's party. I went out to pick the range (I try to clean-pick it when it's slow to make it easier when they have to really clean pick it for mowing) and I was out there for maybe an hour when it started to get weird.

I see a cart tearing towards me in the middle of the driving range, so I stop and get out to see what the guy wants. He's pretty clearly drunk, not even capable of driving a golf cart in a straight line, but he gets to me and reaches in his pocket to grab something. He stumbles over to me and tells me, "We only have the bus rented for another hour and a half, and we need to get to Denver." (We were about an hour from Denver) "I need you to help me round everyone up to leave." As he says this he stuffs what he took out of his pocket into my hand, which turns out to be a wad of about 20 $1 bills. I jump into the cart and get the information of where his group is on the course, and we go tearing off. He pulls out more money from his pocket and tells me he will give me more for each group we gather.

As we get to the first group I realize that the ladies with the party were obviously not regular acquaintances of the men. I say this because they were, at best, half dressed by the time we went to collect the party to leave. The guy in the cart with me yells at the group to head in to the clubhouse, then turns to me and starts yelling, "Drive over there! I want to slap her @$$!" Since he's shoving money into my pocket as he says it, I acquiesce to his request and he does as he promised, before yelling at me to do the same. Slightly uncomfortable with where the situation is going, I refuse and we drive on to the next group while the guy ribs on me for not doing it. We get to the second group and the guy yells at the group to go in. As we pass, he yells for the girls to flash us, which they do, and we move on to collect the final group as the girl pulls out more money and hands it to me.

This is where it gets even weirder. As we pull up to the third group, I notice that two of the men are completely naked and one of them is urinating in the rough. The leader in my cart yells at them to move in, but tells me to stop and jumps out of the cart when he sees the two guys. The two naked guys are now in the cart driving towards the clubhouse, and the leader of the group makes a flying superman leap to land across their laps as they start to do donuts around my cart. After a lap or two the leader jumps off and back into my cart, yelling for the others to race us. He turns to me and says, "If we beat the others back to the bus, I'll give you the rest of the cash in my hand." We go tearing across the course, and I take the little used maintenance path that provides a more direct shortcut to the clubhouse and parking lot. The other carts follow and start bumping my cart to try and jostle me off the path into the weeds. I end up beating them when they swerve to hit me again and spin out on the loose dirt path, and the guy in the cart with me hands me a wad of money before running onto the bus followed by the rest of the people.

The bus leaves, and I'm left with 6 carts scattered across the parking lot where the group left them. In cleaning out the carts I find four pairs of pants, two pairs of briefs (from the naked guys), two sets of car keys, three bras, five shirts, and a pair of panties along with many, many bottles of liquor. The person in the clubhouse had come out to help me clean up after the people, and we ended up laughing pretty hard the whole time we were emptying the carts. All told I ended up with about $40-50 cash from the guy and an interesting story to tell.

This was one of the greater things I have read on this site! I'm dying laughing

[rkim291968]

This was one of the greater things I have read on this site! I'm dying laughing

The "Number Cruncher" sold his soul for $40!     ....

[Valleygolfer]

Alright, I'll post it and if a moderator comes later and finds it to be inappropriate I'm okay with it being deleted.

I was working outside services, cleaning and lining up carts mostly, when a party bus pulls up.......

Thanks for setting the bar so high....geez.  This sounds fun, not embarrassing.

[Lihu]

The "Number Cruncher" sold his soul for $40!     ....

Nah, $50, and all don't forget about all the underwear, car keys and shirts!

[Gator Hazard]

Nah, $50, and all don't forget about all the underwear, car keys and shirts!

Working at a Golf Course:  $8/hr

Driving depraved drunken imbicile around to gather bachelor party crew: $50

Relating a story about playing golf cart bumper car with drunken people partying naked on a golf course slappin asses and getting paid for it:  PRICELESS!!

Edited October 23, 2015 by Gator Hazard

[inthehole]

Was on a business trip a couple years ago in OK City & had some free time on fly in day.    Rented clubs at a nice local course.    Teamed up with a cool local business man, and I was playing surprisingly well (ball REALLY carries out there - just smoking the ball perfect every time with that Nike Covert rental driver).    So about halfway through the round, we start catching this foursome of walkers ahead of us.   Next hole we bump into a guy who was waiting for us ... it was the OSU ladies golf coach.    He said his girls just tee'd off, but he'll hold them up & let us tee off & then jump ahead.  He said he's got two all Americans there, so just don't hit it past them - and winked (knowing they were long hitters).

Problem is that when I got to the tee box, I saw four of the most attractive young ladies I've ever seen, the fact that they were super talented golfers put the already pegged attractive meter past 10.

So, my partner stripes one right down the pipe and gets a clap from the girls.    Now, the pressure's on ... feeling it.   I step up, address the ball, and manage to hit the most brutal snap hook I've ever seen - it must have gone a hundred yards straight & 200 yards left into a pond, which was so far out of play, neither of us even knew there was water there.   I was apparently trying to hit it farther than the girls and made a complete mockery of it - it was an atrocity of a golf shot.    Totally immasculated, I managed to lob one out there next, about 30 yards behind the girls tee shots.    After we eventually left the tee box, my partner was laughing his ass off ... I remember exactly what he said ... "put a few pretty girls on the tee box and you fold like a circus tent" - it was pretty hilarious.

[rkim291968]

Nah, $50, and all don't forget about all the underwear, car keys and shirts! 

Fringe benefits!