Places have a dress code. Who is "asking" versus "telling"?
If someone is rude in "telling" instead of "asking" that's not the "fault" of the dress code. That's a customer service issue, or a personality issue, or something like that.
So what are you talking about, exactly?
The 3 wood is a club I hit well. Actually might be the club I hit the best. For me it feels like the perfect length and weight balance to fit my swing and setup.
If you find yourself topping the ball, pulling/hooking when hitting off the deck I can tell you what I do.
1. I find it especially important to keep your width throughout the swing so there is a sweeping motion. I think big arc, lead arm stays relatively straight, at least don't let it break down, collapse so to speak during transition or the downswing.
2. I actually feel my head moving downwards during transition. Or think of that squat move that lowers your body slightly. Might feel as if you are going to hit it fat but it is the move I find that keeps from topping the ball because after all, you tee up the driver and the woods off the tee block the most, so you obviously have to have a different feel when hitting off the deck.
3. No need to try and swing out of your shoes. The 3 wood is a long club and keeping a big arc will provide the swing speed. If it's not enough, know your distance and lay up the best you can.
Note: I wouldn't recommend looking for an alternative club. I sucked at the 3 wood before I spent the time at the range to figure it out and put in enough reps to get comfortable with it.