Those are good questions. I deal with them every day as I teach. My perspective comes back to teaching golf as a series of skills. Swinging the club is at times difficult because our instnct is telling us to muscle the ball. To learn the skill of swinging the club take a look at
my video golf lesson
"Is Your Golf Swing a 'Swing'?".
When you talk about hinging happening on its own on the backswing and the unhinging happening naturally on the downswing, we get a little confused in golf because good players do articles and tell you what they "feel". Hinging and unhinging is certainly second nature to them, but it got that way through practice. For well timed unhinging on the downswing, there are very things better than hitting delofted low punch shots. To have the club delofted and hit it low the wrists remain hinged longer into the downswing. This is the skill of striking the ball solid which I talk about the
video golf lesson
I call Golf's Most Important Lesson.
I hope this helps. I wish there was a way to completely avoid thinking while you swing, but it is a necessary evil as you are building your skills. Good luck.