American football's OK. Of course, it would be improved by getting rid of all that padding and the forward passing, and making every player play the entire match instead of going off for a rest every five minutes, and changing its name to rugby, but still, it's OK, especially if you record it and skip through the adverts and intervals and changeovers and wotnot.
Basketball: well, I'm sure it's fun to play, but... Well, I watched a couple of NBA games recently and they were really boring : the jokes were rubbish, not like the Harlem Globetrotters I used to watch as a lad. The trouble with basketball is there are too many points -- Team A scores, then Team B scores, then Team A scores, then... Occasionally, there's a variation and Team A scores twice on the run, but still, there's not nearly enough variety in the sport for me to watch.
Baseball's not too bad -- who could really object to watching grown men playing rounders in their pyjamas?
Of course, all three are vasty preferable to football.
So, to sum up: you'll all be a lot happier if you dropped all US-grown sports (and football) and started watching rugby and cricket instead. You know it makes sense.
;-)