The Slapper

Good job on the course. Wish I had your weather - here in Canada courses are closed until mid-April.

So that's where this Alice thing comes from.....REALLY? Good story I guess. I've played and watched golf all my life and this is the first I've ever heard of, "being an Alice."

Since I was a young man, there has been an unwritten rule that if you don't hit it beyond the ladies tees, which was no more than 20 yards ahead, you had to pull out your knob/dick/penis. Listen Patch, the full-on -embarrassing scrub shot is something I've come accustomed to during my entire 33 golf career. I call it the chunk shot, the worm burner, the full-on scrubber. Golf is weird in the sense that even a close to perfect golfer will recall such a shot as described here...

If you play long enough, all kinds of things can happen in Golf. Heck, eventually on your home course you end up eagling or birding every single hole. My record is 2 birdies in a row and the second was a fluke that slammed into the cup - it should have been 10 yards behind the back of the green. Never mind getting 3 consecutive birdies, apparently Mark Calcavecchia recorded 8 consecutive birdies during his 2009 Canadian Open round.

Not certain what an "Alice," is????

Well, thanks then. I feel better now that I know I'm not suffering from a real midlife crisis. Meanwhile, I'll hop into the sack and snuggle soundly with my brand new Ping G30 Irons, Taylormade Driver, 2-Scotty Cameron Putters, 4 pairs of new golf shoes, 3 new golf gloves, 8 dozen Titleist balls, and the knowledge that I'm getting $83 an hour lessons from a Pro.

Oakley Carbon 2 Golf Shoes. Good write up on them, but I can't find them in Canada. Need to ship them up from the States.

Lol, yeah that's some pretty ugly gold attire. Even Payne stewart looked better than this Nike stuff.

Too bad they didn't sell new golf swings. I did spend some money wisely and hooked up with a reputable Pro. Paid $480 Canadian for 6- one hour lessons. He has me focussing on a "high-to-low" swing that compresses the ball first as opposed to sweeping the ball like a slapper.

Thanks for the replies, guys. The answer to my question is right there when I scroll through the threads. Without getting in to details, financially I am quite secure with my home paid for and a decent retirement plan in place. I guess I'm not an extravagant spender and it strikes me as odd to feel the need to purchase a 3rd brand new golf glove or 8 dozen Tileist ProV's. To me that's seems like a mid-life crisis thing. I keep telling myself that surely my desire to keep making golf equipment purchases is coming to an end? Another interesting point made is that all this new equipment won't at all improve my game. This concerns me. Yikes.

Funny about Golf weather, I just spent the weekend in Huntsville, Ontario where on Saturday it was minus 31 Celcius, which I think for you Yanks, that's minus 20 or more. I'm shining my clubs here in Canada until the 2nd week of April.

I don't know if it's just that I'm at that stage in my life where I have lots of excess $$$$$, or if it's that I'm having a true mid-life crisis. Whatever it is, it's Golf related! Starting last fall I went on a Golf spending spree that looks to be finally coming to an end - even my wife is starting to ask what's up. My question to you fellow golfers is: Am I just rolling in the cash/money now, and don't know what to do with it - or is it that I'm having a true mid-life crisis? Since late last fall, here's the truthful facts of what I've bought: 1) TaylorMade R15 Driver and 3 Wood 2) Ping I25 5- Wood 3) Ping G 30 Irons UW to 4 Iron 4) Scotty Cameron 2014 Masters Notchback 2 Putter. And another Scotty Cameron Titleist Golo S5 5) Ping Tour Bag & a Super Light Weight "Ogio" Carry Bag 6) Couple of new gloves - a Titleist and a Footjoy Stasof - I feel like I need another back-up 7) 2 new pairs of Adidas Golf shoes, both Adipur - Brown and White. Another pair of black Oakley Carbon 2 8) A total of 9 dozen Titleist Pro V 's and pro v -x's

Changed everything in the bag: 1) TaylorMade R15 Driver and 3 Wood 2) Ping I25 5- Wood 3) Ping G 30 Irons UW-4 Iron 4) Scotty Cameron 2014 Masters Notchback 2 Putter 5) New Tour Bag 6) Couple of new gloves 7) 2 new pairs of Adidas Golf shoes 8) 3 dozen Titleist Pro V that should be lost by the end of May

This is great! I've already spent a half hour reading through the thread and will re-visit it again. Some very helpful practice techniques. Thanks.

Hello fellow golfers, Recently spent a stack of money on re-tooling all my golf equipment and then knew in my heart-of-hearts that I just could not buy a golf swing. So now my better judgement along with some urging from other golfers better than myself, I went ahead and took some lessons with a reputable Pro. I have confidence in this Pro. For 3, one hour lessons now we've been working on dropping the club down to complete a, " high to low swing." I had developed 30 plus years of sweeping the ball and now I am learning to compress the ball first with a swing that is concentrating on a finish that ends at my left pocket. Lately I've been practicing my new swing in an in-door driving range on those dreaded mats. I've been told to trust the swing with a finish on my left-front foot. What I have noticed is that when done right the ball blasts off the club head effortlessly. However, I have ALWAYS been prone to the full-on shank shot (you know, the embarassing chunk) and worry that with a swing that now descends on to the ball, this chunk shot of mine will become even more frequent. My question to you good golfers is: Could you plz describe ways to avoid the ground with the chunk shots and pick the ball clean. Thanks in advance for your thoughts, The Slapper....