What your favorite brain teaser or joke?

[ks8829]

do you ask the man how a liar would answer the question. the liar would lie and the honest man and give you the wrong direction and the honest man will tell you the truth what a liar would answer and you would go the other direction to the answer.

[ElTigre]

One day jesus moses and a mystery man were playing golf in a threesome.

Jesus hit first and hit his ball into a shallow part in the water, so he walked on the water to his ball and hit on the green in regulation.

Next Moses hit his ball in the water, but it sunk deep into the lake. So Moses parted the water and hit his ball onto the green in regulation.

Now it was the mystery mans turn. He took his swing and the ball rocketed into the air, where it was suddenly grabbed by a hawk, the hawk was then struck down by lightning, where the ball fell out of the air and hit the back of a turtle and got a huge kick onto the green, rolling all the way to the edge of the cup. Jesus and moses looked pissed, and the mystery man disappointed, however as he approached the hole a massive earthquake hit and the ball was shaken into the cup.

Thats when jesus snapped and yelled "DAD IF YOU DONT STOP F*#$@*$ AROUND WE ARE GOING TO KICK YOU OUT OF THE GROUP!"

[Fat Slice]

do you ask the man how a liar would answer the question. the liar would lie and the honest man and give you the wrong direction and the honest man will tell you the truth what a liar would answer and you would go the other direction to the answer.

OK, try this:

"Hello. I am trying to go to Augusta, and one of these two roads will get me there. If I decide to ask you which road, what would you say?" You don't ask him directly, you ask him what he WOULD say. So the truth teller will, of course, tell you the right way. Now, the liar...if you just asked him, he would lie and tell you the wrong way. BUT...you asked him what he *would* say (which, of course, would be the wrong way), but he is a LIAR...so he would not tell you what he *would* say, he will lie about it and tell you the opposite. So by adding another layer, you get him to lie about his lie and you end up with the truth.

[Jay-Bird]

I always carry an extra pair of socks in my bag, incase I get a hole in one.

[iacas]

do you ask the man how a liar would answer the question. the liar would lie and the honest man and give you the wrong direction and the honest man will tell you the truth what a liar would answer and you would go the other direction to the answer.

No, the liar will lie about what a liar would say.

Assuming the correct road is to the right, the honest man would tell you to go to the left (because that's what a liar would say). A liar, knowing a liar would say to go to the left, would tell you to go to the right.

[SubPar]

In the land called Georgia there are two types of people, those who always lie and those who always tell the truth. These people all look alike so you never know which you are talking to, the liars or the truth tellers. Also, in the land called Georgia you are only allowed to ask one question of any person you meet.

You ask: "If I were to ask you which way leads to Augusta, what would you tell me?"

You won't know if the person was a liar or a truth-teller but the answer you get will be the correct one. SubPar

[jonanthans]

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road?

JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what "they" call it: the "other side." Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side." That chicken should not be free to cross the road. It's as plain and simple as that.

KEN STARR:
I intend to prove that the chicken crossed the road at the behest of the President of the United States of America in an effort to distract law enforcement officials and the American public from the criminal wrongdoing our highest elected official has been trying to cover up. As a result, the chicken is just another pawn in the president's ongoing and elaborate scheme to obstruct justice and undermine the rule of law. For that reason, my staff intends to offer the chicken unconditional immunity provided he co-operates fully with our investigation. Furthermore, the chicken will not be permitted to reach the other side of the road until our investigation and any Congressional follow-up investigations have been completed. (We also are investigating whether Sid Blumenthal has leaked information to the Rev. Jerry Falwell, alleging the chicken to be homosexual in an effort to discredit any useful testimony the bird may have to offer, or at least to ruffle his feathers.)

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

DR. SEUSS:
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes!
The chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed,
I've not been told!

ERNEST HEMINGWAY:
To die. In the rain.

MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

GRANDPA:
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

ARISTOTLE:
It is in the nature of chickens to cross the road.

KARL MARX:
It was a historical inevitability.

SADDAM HUSSEIN:
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

RONALD REAGAN:
What chicken?

CAPTAIN JAMES T. KIRK:
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

FOX MULDER:
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens have to cross before you believe it?

FREUD:
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

BILL GATES:
I have just released eChicken 98, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook-and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken please?

LOUIS FARRAKHAN:
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed the "black man" in order to trample him and keep him down.

THE BIBLE:
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.

COLONEL SANDERS:
I missed one?

[SubPar]

the question you ask is "which way would a dis-honest Georgian tell me leads to Augusta. And you take the road they point at

Nope.

If you ask this direct question (above) you will get two different answers, depending on the nature of the person you are asking. If you ask an honset person "which way would a dis-honest Georgian tell me leads to Augusta.", he'll give you the correct answer which would be the wrong direction. If you ask that question and the person is a liar, he will lie and give you the opposite answer, actually the right direction, but you have no way of knowing that. It has to be an proposition and you cannot actually ask directly about the direction, but rather ask how they would answer. "If I were to ask you which road leads to Augusta, what would you (then) answer (or tell me)?" The honest man will point the correct direction to Augusta, as will the dishonest man. No matter which person you are asking, you will get the same answer which is the answer you seek. SubPar (If John Daly is playing, just follow the trail of beer cans!)

[jonanthans]

well, what I was thinking was if you asked "what road would the dishonest man tell you was the way to Augusta" the honest guy would point towards the wrong road, lets say the left. A dishonest man would lie about what a dishonest man would tell you, making it a double lie, and pointing to the left road as well. you then take the right road. makes sense to me, maybe im wrong...my head hurts now....

edit: I see your point as well, I guess I tried to over-think it. I still think mine would work as well, but I so confused myself trying to work it out I am likely wrong..!!!

[SubPar]

A dishonest man would lie about what a dishonest man would tell you, making it a double lie, and pointing to the left road as well. you then take the right road. makes sense to me, maybe im wrong...my head hurts now....

This is where your reasoning breaks down. He would lie about what the dishonest man would say and point in the correct direction. You zigged when you should have zagged.

SubPar

[PEZGolf]

1. If God is all powerful and the Creator, can He create a rock so large that he cannot move it?

2. If God is all knowing and the Creator, can He create a riddle that He cannot solve?

And I am NO atheist, but a True Believer so do not think that these indicate any lack of faith on my part. Nonetheless, they are interesting to think about.

[zeg]

1. If God is all powerful and the Creator, can He create a rock so large that he cannot move it?

For those who are either sufficiently atheist or sufficiently religious to be bothered by involving god in these questions, you can consider more neutral forms of similar philosophical questions.

In Mathematics: Consider the set of ALL sets that do not contain themselves. Does this set contain itself? In Computer Science: Can you write a program which, given any program as input, determines whether this program will complete in a finite amount of time? In Biology: Which came first, the chicken or the egg? (ok, ok, this one is a little different, and I think the geneticists have pretty well wrapped this one up in favor of the egg...) These are the sorts of questions that led to Goedel's Incompleteness Theorem, one of the better known bits of mathematical philosophy. Essentially, it says that any system of logic has statements that are either unprovable (i.e., are neither true nor false) or inconsistent (i.e., are both true and false).

[erniebanks]

Did you hear about the plastic surgeon who hung himself?

[PEZGolf]

These are the sorts of questions that led to Goedel's Incompleteness Theorem, one of the better known bits of mathematical philosophy. Essentially, it says that any system of logic has statements that are either unprovable (i.e., are neither true nor false) or inconsistent (i.e., are both true and false).

PEZ SEZ: I think that theorem applies to me. Because the saga of my life is what it is, the question as to whether my life is worthwhile to mankind (and womankind) is unprovable, and not yet complete. I hope it does NOT get completed today. Every day, I ask St. Peter "Is today THE day?", and today he gave me the same answer, "HE and WE are NOT ready FOR YOU---------------YET. Today is NOT the day."

[SubPar]

1. If God is all powerful and the Creator, can He create a rock so large that he cannot move it?

A long-standing debate:

The Paradox of the Stone