Rant/Help needed:Father issues.

**Laxplayer201092** · July 4, 2008

Heres the lay out.. I have lately been taking the club outside on my takeaway, and my set up has been pretty haphazard..

So heres how it goes. Brian (thats me) Lines up shot, Dad steps in and corrects my line, setting up all of my shots for slices and such, WHich is pretty stupid to aim at the left side of the green, when i hit a draw. When i tell him i hit a draw, he says, "you need to work on hitting it straight. stop working on drawing"

AFter every shot.. EVERY i can hack one three feet, and he will always say, "good ball" if im 50 feet away on the green, i dont consider that a good shot.. Annoying..

Finally.. if i make a bad swing with the driver, "you were swinging so good a month ago, what did you do" or, "what happened?" Or some like ieteration of those two.

Now, over the course of 18 holes.. This gets me pissed. Like i physically cannot stand to be there anymore..

Unfortunatly, I do not have my liscence yet.. so as of now he is my ride to the course. I get free golf so he does not have to pay for me anymore.. but i still have no ride.

so should i,
A) completly quit golfing with him?
B)golf with my friends and not ask him for rides?
C) golf with him and try to put up with it?
D) golf, but ask him not to talk to me?

Is this problem kinda childish? yea.. but its driving me crazy..

End Rant.

**golf_junkie27** · July 4, 2008

I don't know how old you are. I'm going to guess late teens? Anyway, I'm a dad and my advice is to tell your dad how you feel. Your dad should not get upset. You're becoming more mature, you're obviously a good golfer and it seems as though you appreciate golfing with him but just don't need the play-by-play.

Tell him exactly how you feel. Just don't give him an attitude. Something like this should work:

Dad, I love golf. I love golfing with you. I just don't need the constant chatter. I know you mean well but I would feel better if I asked you for advice instead of you giving it to me. Is that cool with you?

Your dad will appreciate it. You might even enjoy golfing with him, more.

**QWKDTSN** · July 4, 2008

Sounds like your dad is supportive of your hobby and he has good intentions, but they may be misplaced. I know it can be hard to bring something like this up but the simplest thing to do is explain to your dad that you are trying to work on your mental game and you don't want any distractions. Tell him that you want to talk about how the round went after it is over.

That way he will be quiet and let you play, and when the round is over, and you are in good spirits after a round with no annoying talk from your pops, he can tell you what he thought. I bet you will start to play better and he will have much less bad to say about your round because of it so the issue will fix itself!

**michaeljames92** · July 4, 2008

hey if i said that he go, "oh thats too bad, looks like you're not playing golf anymore." any single thing that i say when i know he is wrong about some golf stuff(confirmed by what pro's and others say) he has a sad and then we don't for like a week. it is weird because everything i say he totally disagrees with. anyway thats my rant. i just wish he would be that understanding as golf junkie seems to be.
My bad, i hijacked your thread but if you're dad is like my dad(does the sort of stuff your dad does) then i would just not play with him or put up with it. confrontation is way off my list of options

**Harry Longshanks** · July 4, 2008

With regard to the swing advice, bring it up with him, but do it in manner that makes it seem like it's more funny than irritating. (e.g., while smiling and chuckling, say "Pop, you know I love ya', but you're killing me here.")

As for the questions, just answer them.

Him: What happened?
You: I came over the top on that one a little. I've been working on that.

Him: Good ball.
You: Thanks dad. I was hoping that it draw in a little closer to the pin, but it will play.

It sounds to me like your pop is trying to make a connection. Are you talking with him about other things during the round? I'm willing to bet that if you are having a fun conversation about baseball, football, women, cars, school, or last weekend's PGA tournament, he wouldn't be focusing on your swing.

In the grand scheme of things, this is nothing to worry about. Sounds like you've got a great dad there. Enjoy this time with him while you can. Before you know it, you will be looking back on these times as some of the best in your life. Trust me on this.

**Laxplayer201092** · July 4, 2008

Ah, I am 16 years old.
I went with the whole, i liek golfing, but your not exactly helping me thing..No joy. It ended up with him yelling alot and pretty much telling me that we werent gonna golf together for a while.

qwkdtsn- i like the idea, you were only a bout a minute off..maybe that would of saved me..haha

Argh. This is incredibly annoying.

Harry-TAhnks for the reply. Generally when we golf, its me, him, and two of his friends. The older guys generally talk, i walk along, but nothing is really said to me, and most of the conversations i have NO right being in..He might be trying to make a connection, as i dont really talk to him all that much, as when we do talk, its not for long portions.. hmm

**Harry Longshanks** · July 4, 2008

Ah, I am 16 years old.

Dude, you only waited 7 minutes between asking the question, and confronting your dad?

Bwa-hahaha

Might I humbly suggest a tad more patience in your life and in golf.

Don't sweat it, he'll get over it soon enough. Maybe wait a couple of days, let him cool off, and then tell him you are sorry and ask him if he wants to go play golf with you. Good luck!

**Laxplayer201092** · July 4, 2008

HAHA. It went like this.

Me: 'enters topic'
Enter dad.
Arguement insued.

I do belive the best route is time. I will give it a week or two. and then it will be try out time, so there wont be to many issues i dont think.

THanks for the help guys.

Brian.

**Ben** · July 4, 2008

He's right, stop playing a draw! A fade is better for you.

In all seriousness, I think junkie put it right. But it looks like your dad wasn't having that. Sorry.

**Laxplayer201092** · July 4, 2008

your right ben...draws are the devil!

THanks for your help everyone, i really appreciate it.

**Saks** · July 4, 2008

your right ben...draws are the devil!

Why are draws the devil? I used to play a fade, but it very easily turned into a slice. My draw does vary from a push to almost a hook, but has proved way more reliable than the old flight...

**michaeljames92** · July 4, 2008

HAHA. It went like this.

sounds exactly like my dad

**dave s** · July 4, 2008

It's likely that your dad sees a lot of potential in your game. He may also be seeing MORE than is possible for you at this time.

Golf is like any other recreational event--it's supposed to be FUN! If playing with your dad isn't fun, play with your friends. Chances aren't real good that your dad is going to retire on your PGA Tour earnings. Reality.

When I play with my 15-year-old, we're out there to have fun, laugh, joke around and have some light-hearted time together. He doesn't LIKE shooting a 58, but we still have fun.

Son rolls approach shot after a rare good drive.

Me: "Blake, are you having fun?!!!"

Son: "How about you shut up?!"

We have a good laugh and get about our game, which never seems to last long enough.

dave

**Laxplayer201092** · July 4, 2008

saks- I like my draw too, i was joking however.

Michael- Sounds like were much in the same boat here..haha.

Dave- I think he sees the potential in me, but he really doesnt do well with the whole coaching aspect, i guess is how id put it. He takes all of his shots very seriously, if he htis a bad shot, hes mad..but if i hit a bad shot, i should just be happy, and not worry. I love going out with friends, when we all shoot like 100 because were all joking and laughing so much that we forget about the game. But its nto like that with my dad, and i guess i just have to get over that part of my life, that maybe i just cant golf with him.

Thanks guys.

**Dent** · July 4, 2008

I'm suprised you don't get along with your dad on the golf course. I find my dad is my favorite playing partner. He knows I know what I'm doing, and somehow knows when to comment, hes not scratch by any means, but in his prime he used to be good, and knows what he's talking about.

For us, no matter what happens off the course (we could get in an argument the same day) we get to the course, and its like nothing happened.

I suggest you take a break from him, and when your ready to finally explain how you feel, go for it, and hopefully he can understand. Your in a tough situation bud, I'd have no idea what to do, maybe draw the conversation away from what your doing on the course, and direct it to other things, maybe it will take his mind off your game.

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Rant/Help needed:Father issues.

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