Curious about this situation/incident opinions needed.

[GoIrish]

Originally Posted by rustyredcab

I have no intention of hijacking this thread. This will be my last post of the subject. Most people reading this thread agree that the intended issue in the thread is the 3-some looked slow after their tee shots. I agree that a slow group in front creates issues. I agree that any good starter should assume that the guests are telling the truth and not questioned OP after the played the back nine. And most everyone would agree with MackJL06's comment:

My point is that when the descriptor is not relevant to the issue (like "three slow geezers"), it can be viewed as simply adding information. But when the descriptor is of an oft oppressed group (think "black men" or "mexicans" or "women" when referring to golf), it smacks of a general negative bias peaking through. And it adds to the negative stereotype. And when we internalize the bias to the point of not even noticing when we do it, it can seem nit picky for someone like me to point it out. Even when one means no malice, being sensitive to oft oppressed groups is good form.

Perhaps I am too sensitive. Perhaps years of hearing people denigrate women golfers has made me hear insults when none were contemplated. Perhaps men-only dining rooms and clubs that do not allow women on the property, and growing up with a mother and three sisters all have made me feel that an open forum comment that adds to the negative stereotype of women golfers, intentionally or otherwise, needs a rebuttal. Substitute another oft oppressed group for the word "women" and see if you find it to be a slur.

That's all the lecturing I have for today.

do you get upset when people use the term" womens tees" as well?

[carpediem4300]

I think it also depends on the course, although getting to know the staff by name is a great help, instead of saying the "Dude in the shop" you could be saying "Mikey said it was fine to start on the back 9 and then try to slot in on the front when its free"

sounds like your in the fold and have respect then,....

My course is much like this, i play as a single and i just turn up whenever, slot in wherever, join up with groups, rarely play through, and if its a really chocca day i'll just play the tees that are free

The main thing to remember is if your not able to play the full 18 int he order you want because of seriously slow people, be prepared to put yourself out by taking longer with the round, starting at different holes, and when reaching another group bear in mind they paid to play in order so you wait for them and slot in when its free

having that mindset beforehand can help immensely

[rustyredcab]

I do not get upset by the term "women's tees." I just don't find it helpful or accurate so I do not use the term myself.

When my son was a young boy, I started calling them "the forward tees" or "the red tees." I got that advise from a friend who was teaching his two sons and one daughter. There seemed no reason to rub a 10-year old boy's nose in the fact that he was playing "ladies" tees.

I see lots of high school kids on the range who play for one of the local schools. They are both boys and girls. I'm sure the best boys hit it farther than the best girls by that age. But plenty of girls make the team. The ball does not know anything about your gender. I predict that in twenty years, as a generation of players find themselves competing on mixed gender teams, the "ladies tees" will give way to the "forward tees" and player will choose tees based on ability and not gender.

By then, I'll be playing whatever they call "the senior tees."

Quote:

do you get upset when people use the term" womens tees" as well?

[lonewolf]

Originally Posted by rustyredcab

I have no intention of hijacking this thread. This will be my last post of the subject. Most people reading this thread agree that the intended issue in the thread is the 3-some looked slow after their tee shots. I agree that a slow group in front creates issues. I agree that any good starter should assume that the guests are telling the truth and not questioned OP after the played the back nine. And most everyone would agree with MackJL06's comment:

My point is that when the descriptor is not relevant to the issue (like "three slow geezers"), it can be viewed as simply adding information. But when the descriptor is of an oft oppressed group (think "black men" or "mexicans" or "women" when referring to golf), it smacks of a general negative bias peaking through. And it adds to the negative stereotype. And when we internalize the bias to the point of not even noticing when we do it, it can seem nit picky for someone like me to point it out. Even when one means no malice, being sensitive to oft oppressed groups is good form.

Perhaps I am too sensitive. Perhaps years of hearing people denigrate women golfers has made me hear insults when none were contemplated. Perhaps men-only dining rooms and clubs that do not allow women on the property, and growing up with a mother and three sisters all have made me feel that an open forum comment that adds to the negative stereotype of women golfers, intentionally or otherwise, needs a rebuttal. Substitute another oft oppressed group for the word "women" and see if you find it to be a slur.

That's all the lecturing I have for today.

You are correct.  You are being too sensitive.