Staying Patient

[albatross]

How do you guys calm yourself down after a bad round and tell yourself you're going to get better? I've taken 4 lessons in the last several weeks, totally redone my swing, hit a ton of range balls and I'm just not making any progress on the course.

I went out this morning and played 9 and shot 49. I hit a bunch of shanks and a lot of 3 woods low and to the left. I just can't make what's happening on the range, happen on the golf course. My pro had my shanks all figured out last week. I was actually standing too far from the ball. It was fixed last week and totally back yesterday and today. How does this happen?

This is a process that will take some REAL time right? I know the answer to this but I need to hear it from other players. I just feel like I've really been putting in the time and it's not paying off yet. I hit some shots today that made it look like I've never played this game before.

My buddy who is playing in just his second season, beat me by 1 today! I'm starting to doubt whether or not I should have started lessons and messed with my swing. I just wanted to build solid fundamentals and a repeating golf swing.

How do you stay patient? This game can truly drive you nuts

[JaY_B]

Swing changes take a lot of time to get used to, especially as you get older as its harder to get out of bad habits.

I can't stress enough (from my own experiance) to stay as far away from technical thoughts as you can on the course, limit your self to maybe one key thought so that you can focus on the task at hand. You will never play well on the course if your trying to achieve ten different things in one swing.

[iacas]

I don't know... How do I stay patient? By being patient...

That's not to dismiss your question, but just to say "huh?" a little. It's not like you can do a drill to stay patient.

About the only other thing I can say is this: Focus on the process, not the results.

I've hit some HORRIBLE shots lately in working on my swing change with my instructor, but:
a) I know a bit more about why I'm hitting those shots, and
b) they're less and less frequent

[CarlSpackler]

I think it boils down to confidence IMHO. You need visualize a good shot on the course and then commit to it. If you think of all the bad stuff that can happen and doubt your abilities because of the changes, you will most likely hit a bad shot. I think the key to improvements in my game lately are related forgiving myself for hitting a bad shot and then focusing on the next.

After a round or practice session, I will ponder what I can work on to improve my score, but then focus on the good shots and commit those to memory. When a similar situation comes up, I will focus on the best shot that I ever hit from similar situation.

[M2R]

If by "how do you stay patient?" you mean how do you keep the faith to see the process of change through the rough times to a successful completion you might find some insight into the process of change in Scott Peck's book "The Road Less Traveled".

It's not specifically about golf but it doesn't seem much of a stretch to extend it to golf. He also talks about the pitfalls in the process of change/growth and how and why people generally go wrong and give up on the process. That line below could easily read:

Peck’s book begins with the profound truth that "golf is difficult" (Peck, 1978/1992[1], p13). We must attest to the fact that golf was never meant to be easy, and that it is nothing but a battlefield of problems. We can either moan about them or solve them. It is here that the vital role of discipline assumes significance.

Peck talks of the importance of discipline. He described four aspects of discipline: * Delaying gratification: Sacrificing present comfort for future gains. * Acceptance of responsibility: Accepting responsibility for one's own decisions. * Dedication to truth: Honesty, both in word and deed. * Balancing: Handling conflicting requirements. Peck talks of an important skill to prioritize between different requirements -- bracketing. Peck’s book begins with the profound truth that "Life is difficult" (Peck, 1978/1992[1], p13). We must attest to the fact that life was never meant to be easy, and that it is nothing but a battlefield of problems. We can either moan about them or solve them. It is here that the vital role of discipline assumes significance. Peck defines discipline as the basic set of tools we require to solve life’s problems. These tools are delaying gratification, assuming responsibility, dedication to the truth, and balancing. These are techniques of suffering, means by which we experience the pain of problems in such a way as to work through them and solve them successfully, learning and growing in the process. Most of us do not want to wrestle with our problems because of the pain involved. Yet, it is only in grappling with our problems that life has its meaning.

[BallStriker]

It seems we are all driven to get better at this game, and one of the hardest things to understand is that tension is a killer -- I think a lot of tension comes from trying too hard.....the fact is, I play my best when I keep everything in perspective....My personal rules are as follows:


1. I am not good enough to get mad at how I play.

2. I have to swing with commitment and without fear of where it is going.

3. Analyze the round after you play, and just play shot to shot during.

4. Enjoy the fact that you are outside playing golf....remember that you could live a war-torn part of the world, where you wake up every day hoping to not get killed or not have someone you love get killed...we have a LOT to be thankful for, and our ability to golf is an extension of that concept.

5. If you ever get upset over a poor shot, recall rule 1.

[RC]

Good advice provided by several... May I add a thought?

Swing changes and "after new lessons" golf is almost always going to be frustrating. Your mental approach to new things is critical. When a shot goes badly, that shot is over... it is done and gone. Go to the ball and think, ah, another chance to hit a good shot and try the things you've learned. This is a lot more valuable advice than worrying about the bad shot. In other words, shift attention immediately to the new situation and get serious about hitting whatever shot is presented.

I have played a long time, and I can promise you, I've hit shots worse than most people. When I learned to think about the opportunity of the next shot rather than dwell on the last bad shot is when the game became a lot more fun. Even if all you have is a pitch out to the fairway, you have an opportunity to hit a recovery -- a good shot, so do that and feel excited about doing it. If you shank one, hey, it happened. Now go hit the next shot and focus on hitting a good one.

[sp33d]

I punch kittens.

I had a round a week ago that almost made me quit forever, i shot like a 60. I was SO pissed at my self, it was horrible. I went home and just sat on my porch and literately starred at the ground for an hour. After I realized I was getting sun burnt I went inside. I thought about the hole game, 1-9 holes. I laughed at my self. Went to the range and hit balls, with no real focus other than to reassure my self that I dont suck at golf.

After I cranked 10-15 balls into the apartments at the end of the driving range I realized that... That was a stupid place to build apartments, and I was so tense after the first hole of my round that there was no way I was going to play good. I didn't realized how tense I was until way after the fact.

I de-stress by thinking of happy thoughts, (yeah happy gilmore) but it works. I think about my future wife, our son, my family, strippers with clear heals. what ever it is that day, just be greatful you are able to spend time doing what you love. Ive lost matches to my friends that have a 20+ handicap I'm usually happier for them than I am pissed at my self.

[CarlSpackler]

I punch kittens.

When you say "into the apartments" do you mean... Wow!

I just finished Rotella's book, Play to Play Great and I have started reading Zen Golf . I've stopped beating myself up when playing poorly and therefore enjoying that game again. I shot 50 last night and still enjoyed it. I am focusing on the tap in birdie that I had and scratching the rest of the round from memory. As far as staying patient, I would say that taking lessons is like planting seeds. If you put them in good soil and water them (be sure not to over water), they WILL grow.

[albatross]

I punch kittens.

Awesome post man. Very funny stuff.

[Leftygolfer]

With changing your golf swing you should EXPECT to get worse. That is the bottom line. Any pro that tells you different is lying. When you make real change it will feel wierd, different. Don't expect much during this period of changing your swing.

I am also going through a similar situation. I used to not be wild, I used to not almost miss the ball, but now I do. But I went through a huge grip change that make it feel like I am doing something I never done. I am getting rewarded at times, but I don't expect my index to go down right now. It has went up 2.2 points in 2 months and it is frustrating. 90s??? That just sucks for me. But I do know that it is for the better. I will be better and I will be in the high 70's by August. It is hard because I know what it feels like to have control on my misses, now I do not.

I also need to work on not getting frustrated. I need to learn how to let the bad shot go. It is hard for me.

There has been some very positive and nice post in this thread.