"You'll never hit a good ball like that sonny"

[powerfader]

So i played the front nine with my buddy and his brother this afternoon, I'm five over after nine (considering I much prefer the back nine this is a pretty good figure for me). So I decide that I'll finish the round solo as they had to go home for supper.

I cross the road to other half of the course and walk up to the tee, out of the corner of my eye I see this old boy driving a cart who's obviously decided to call it a day and I say hello as he passes me. As I tee my ball up and pull out my 5-wood I notice he's stopped and is staring at me.

I make a fairly nervy swing (revert to the pull slice I've been trying to banish) and the ball goes down the left side of the fairway into a position that makes the next shot almost impossible (the holes a dog-leg to the left). I say something like "oh blast" (trying to curb my golfing Tourettes) and go to pick up my bag. Here's the play by play of the conversation we had.

You'll never hit a good ball like that sonny [In the thickest Wallace and Gromitesque Yorkshire accent]
Sorry?
Your left side collapsed, your grip is too srong, your footwork is all wrong; you're swaying all over the place, try and keep your head still.
Oh, I suppose, it wasn't my best swing of the day. [I try and escape]
You know in my day I was a 2 handicap, come over here and I'll show you how its done.

At which point we go through an awkward inpromptu (and totally unwanted) lesson, in which he shouts instructions to me as I endeavour to comply in the hope he'll eventually leave me alone.
It's not just the unsolicitated advice that riles me, nor the completely patronising way in which he talked to me, its the fact he totally destroyed my round. For the next nine holes, everytime I was about to make impact with the ball "You'll never hit a good ball like that sonny" rang in my ears and I proceeded to post an 86!
I'm never listening to golfing advice from anyone ever again. It never helps, alright my swing isn't perfect but its comfortable and I've posted 74's before using it, why change? Any adjustments take ages to bed-in and in the meantime you're playing unenjoyable golf. Perhaps he was just trying to be helpful and if I was at the driving range it would be just about tolerable, but halfway through a round is SO unhelpful. Am I just a stubborn, grumpy tosser?

[ctw262]

So i played the front nine with my buddy and his brother this afternoon, I'm five over after nine (considering I much prefer the back nine this is a pretty good figure for me). So I decide that I'll finish the round solo as they had to go home for supper.

After hearing that, I would have just said "nah, I'm alright." and walked away. I hate when people give advice when I don't ask for it.

[RocketSauce]

LOL!!! sounds like the old guy just wanted someone to talk to, lol

[powerfader]

After hearing that, I would have just said "nah, I'm alright." and walked away. I hate when people give advice when I don't ask for it.

I'm only 23 (and look about 18) so I can't really say that to a senior member. Plus I didn't want to hurt his feelings, he probably did have good intentions. But it totally ruined what felt like a potential single-figure round, golf's all about confidence and I went from George Clooney to George Costanza in the space of one hole.

[ctw262]

I'm only 23 (and look about 18) so I can't really say that to a senior member. Plus I didn't want to hurt his feelings, he probably did have good intentions. But it totally ruined what felt like a potential single-figure round, golf's all about confidence and I went from George Clooney to George Costanza in the space of one hole.

Im 23 as well and I probably would have said, "I'm alright", and walked away. Not trying to be disrespectful, but not wanting advice either

[Shindig]

Im 23 as well and I probably would have said, "I'm alright", and walked away. Not trying to be disrespectful, but not wanting advice either

I'll be 26 on Sunday, I look a little more than half that, and I wouldn't have any problem saying "thanks, but maybe after the round."

(Of course, with no intention of actually listening to the advice after the round)

[powerfader]

I'll be 26 on Sunday, I look a little more than half that, and I wouldn't have any problem saying "thanks, but maybe after the round."

In retrospect that's probably the way I should've gone. But in my defence I was caught slightly off-guard he was giving me the lesson and having me perform practice swings before I knew what hit me. In general I try and avoid confrontation (physical or verbal). If I'd been dismissive he'd have been off to the clubhouse moaning about me, not to mention it's likely I'd come across him on the course again leading to more awkward moments.

[Shindig]

In retrospect that's probably the way I should've gone. But in my defence I was caught slightly off-guard he was giving me the lesson and having me perform practice swings before I knew what hit me. In general I try and avoid confrontation (physical or verbal). If I'd been dismissive he'd have been off to the clubhouse moaning about me, not to mention it's likely I'd come across him on the course again leading to more awkward moments.

I guess I'm used to it, and I play municipal courses, so I don't have to worry about the "membership." I also find the "maybe later, at the range, I can't integrate advice on the course" comment to be sufficiently non-dismissive that people don't seem to be offended.

What type of course is this?

[wannabe]

that was a funny story. thanks for sharing. hopefully next time you run into him you'll be able to politely avoid his advice.

btw, I think you did the right thing stopping, if nothing else out of respect for your elders. next time just be ready with a response to get you out of the lesson, or get better at shaking that kind of advice off.

[powerfader]

I guess I'm used to it, and I play municipal courses, so I don't have to worry about the "membership." I also find the "maybe later, at the range, I can't integrate advice on the course" comment to be sufficiently non-dismissive that people don't seem to be offended.

Its a private members club, not overly snooty but everyone seems to know everyone and word gets around if someone acts inappropriately.

[McGolf-Doggie]

I also find the "maybe later, at the range, I can't integrate advice on the course" comment to be sufficiently non-dismissive that people don't seem to be offended.

Shindig, that's a great idea.

Powerfader, don't feel bad, it's our Brit nature to be as polite as possible and to try to not to offend by inconsiderate comments. Been in the US 25+ years and the UK 22+ years so I offer this translation. Also, I can never come up with the right words at the right time. Your mind is so on the game that it's not easy to have the gift of the gab going to. "Thanks mate, I appreciate having a 2nd pair of eyes. It's pretty rare to get a seasoned eye to look at your swing without paying for it, but I gotta tell ya, I'm totally hopeless at integrating advice on the course. My philosophy is to go with the swing that got me here, and not to ever think during my swing. But I'll tell you what, I'm certainly going to try that at the range later. Thanks again." or the non-confrontational alter ego silent thought: "Sod off mush, unless you want me show you why I always thought I'd make a good dentist, with my 5 iron!...nah, just kidding, really. Let me buy you a pint at the clubhouse and you can tell me that again so I can give it a go at the range."

........................................
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[CarlSpackler]

Just smile and wave.

Oddly enough, I am usually able to to rip one down the middle if I have a gallery.

[powerfader]

Shindig, that's a great idea.

Small world, I'm at Exeter Uni now but I know loads of people at the college. The course is Honiton GC maybe you know of it?

[jamo]

I went from George Clooney to George Costanza in the space of one hole.

Thats a good one. lol

[Mr3Putt]

If I'd been dismissive he'd have been off to the clubhouse moaning about me, not to mention it's likely I'd come across him on the course again leading to more awkward moments.

Yeah, so now you will fast become his favorite student. That won't be awkward at all....

[Fat Slice]

Do NOT tell that story around the clubhouse or else they will *all* have your number come match play time.

"Well, looks like I'm gonna get you old timer...I'm up 4 with 5 holes to go!"

("You'll never hit a good ball like that sonny")

choke choke choke choke choke

"Good match..." Cries.

[Trav]

Its a private members club, not overly snooty but everyone seems to know everyone and word gets around if someone acts inappropriately.

Don't worry, if he's like the rest of us at an advanced age, he forgot that he met you by the time he got back to the clubhouse. Of course that means he may try to offer you advice again.

Another approach - tell him you appreciate his interest, but you have a limited time window to get in your round today so you'll have to take a rain check on the lesson. Or - suggest one of your friends as really needing the lesson.

[OnePutt]

1. Could have given him a "no thanks" and walked away, at least ignored him.

2. As mental approach gets stronger, scores will improve.

Just saying, not that I'm a great golfer (decent for 6 weeks of playing though) but I think mentally I can get it done.