Playing Partners Who Tell You What You Did Wrong

[dag2000]

I walked on as a single and was paired with another single and a twosome. The other single was a nice enough guy, late 50s, decent player, but three times he told me I lifted my head or pulled up or something similar after I had just hit an utterly crap shot. He was about 25 yards away from me when, after saying it the third time, I glared, held up my hand like a traffic cop, and stalked off. What I wanted to do was say "If you tell me what I did wrong one more time, I'm burying my sand wedge in your head."

It didn't ruin the round for me, not even close. But it did bother me.

[hkmp5]

Good for you I would have done the same thing , The next shot that he took I would have made a comment about the loop in his back swing and ask him why he did that.

[ks8829]

I would say, Thank you for your comments, however I would perfer that you don't comment on my golf game. thank you very much.


I have a friend that plays with us and he sometime stands behind me or starts walking on my down swing on my shots, I need to talk to him.

[MiniMoe]

I never offer any advice or mention swing flaws unless I am asked. Even then I hesitate. When you are playing golf, the worst thing in the world is to think about swing mechanics. There is one guy I play with that is always tinkers when he misses a short putt or had a bad swing. So when I miss one, he offers his .02 with statements like your hands did not roll over, or your eyes moved on that putt. I have told him a hundred times I don't care. I never think about mechanics... ever. I think he does it to try to get into my head so I play bad trying to fix my swing or putting stroke. I don't tinker while I play. He drives me nuts.... but he pays well, so I guess I have the last laugh.

[alf174]

Most of the people I golf with keep their thoughts to themselves (so do I) but where I see the problem is between married couples I know. They can really grind on each others nerves when they are critiquing each other which can sometimes ruin the round for anyone else in their group. I jokingly threaten that on the next outing I setup, I will split them up (I plan on following through with it). Or I'll say "You're not good enough to be mad".

[flopdarock]

i think some ppl just dont have a clue that their gesture of kindness is a breach in ettiquette... like they want to help you get better cuz they believe they know whats wrong... they just dont know that giving swing advice in the middle of the round in itself is wrong...
some of the nicest ppl ive played with have given me unsolicited advice the funny thing is... they were terrible players themselves...
teh one that pissed me off the most was playing in a 4some consisting of a husband and a wife... another single(single digit guy who was pretty good)... and myself... the single digit guy takes it upon himself to give lessons to the couple using me as the "bad" example... the couple was very appreciative with the free lesson and if i said anything it woulda made me look like a dick... i pretty much just clammed up and tried not to let it get to me and played my round feeling like a 3rd wheel

[CG031]

I never offer any advice or mention swing flaws unless I am asked. Even then I hesitate. When you are playing golf, the worst thing in the world is to think about swing mechanics. There is one guy I play with that is always tinkers when he misses a short putt or had a bad swing. So when I miss one, he offers his .02 with statements like your hands did not roll over, or your eyes moved on that putt. I have told him a hundred times I don't care. I never think about mechanics... ever. I think he does it to try to get into my head so I play bad trying to fix my swing or putting stroke. I don't tinker while I play. He drives me nuts.... but he pays well, so I guess I have the last laugh.

Well said, I agree. If someone asks me something like, "What do you think I did wrong there?" Or "Did I move my head?" I'll offer my advice to the best of my ability, but I won't go out of my way to say what they did wrong on a swing or putt or chip or whatever.

I've had people ask me for lessons while I was on the chipping green (short game is by far the best part of my game) and then I will help them out, but I wouldn't go up to them and say "Wow, you're technique is off, let me show you..."

[Shindig]

I find the following phrase useful:

"I know what I'm doing wrong. I'm playing with you!"

[Chas]

LOL, I wish that I had the nerve to say that.

Actually it's rare for me to have this problem, most golfers seem to know this golden rule. The rare exceptions usually don't realize that it's a big no-no and think they're doing you a favor.

I'd probably say something like, "I make changes to my game on the driving range only. On the course I just play with what I've got, so no advice please."

[JGulkCG]

see the one time i think it is okay to do this....I play golf a lot with a kid, and we both get lessons from the same Pro. Well when we play together, were well enough off to figure out what were both doing if something goes wrong. Then its okay to say something about the swing.

[Orange]

This year, I mentioned to a playing partner that I hate hitting out of the sand because I really don't know how to correctly. He then showed me how you're supposed to while we were waiting to tee off at the next hole and mentioned to me that I should invest in a sand wedge (I currently use my 60* most of the time... and now I know that's not the right club to use, haha). Anyways, he was very helpful and I appreciated his tips during the round. He didn't really give advice unless I had a question or mentioned something about my game.

I wouldn't normally do this to anyone I play with, but the guy is a regular at the course I work at and he recognized me as an employee. He was very easy to talk to during the round. Next time I saw him at work he asked if I had played since then and I hadn't, though I told him I went to Golfsmith to look at sand wedges. I told him I still needed to save some money, then he said "I could probably just give you one of mine." Haha, he hasn't done that yet, but he said that he has around eight at home. I would feel bad letting him give me one of his clubs though.

And the next round I played, I only hit in (and out of) the sand once. It was also my best round ever. ;)

[mfreeman73]

I can't stand when people give me advice on the course. Yeah, I know I suck. But, usually I know what the problem is. See, I KNOW how a swing is supposed to look and what my body is supposed to do, but I can't quite get my body to go along with it.

So, when I top the ball, like I'm prone to do, it has nothing to do with ignorance and more to do with not getting my body to do what I know it's supposed to do. So, it's annoying when someone else says, "you're pulling your head up," or something like that. I usually just say politely, "yeah, I know."

I think what some people don't understand is when they offer unsolicited advice, it doesn't usually help. In fact, it just makes things more tense and makes it harder to relax and play well.

[Sir Ryan]

I shine them on with a thanks, and if they ask me to try it, I'll do my same exact swing and they'll say, yeah like that!

But, if i'm playing with someone very very good, i give a good listen. though a good player knows not to bother someone's swing unless asked for.

[iWALK18]

I don't even like positive comments about my swing. If someone starts talking about how good my tempo is or something like that I start thinking about it.

[Sir Ryan]

I don't even like positive comments about my swing. If someone starts talking about how good my tempo is or something like that I start thinking about it.

With you on that one.

[bucklateral]

It seems that those who give the most advice are those who need it themselves, but don't know it.

I love playing with really good golfers. They never say anything negative, always positive, and if I ask they always help.

It is those who are okay golfers but think they can compete with Tiger that can't keep their advice to themselves. I just ask them more and more questions. Everything from how 1 foot puts might break to the height of my ball on the tee. Their game gets worse and worse as they focus more on my game and less on theirs. Twice I have been able to beat their own score with this strategy.

[Drennen13]

I never tell anyone what they did wrong just because its not my problem. I do notice everything they do wrong and in turn if it continues they usually ask me and i quickly answer lol

[Sir Ryan]

It seems that those who give the most advice are those who need it themselves, but don't know it.

Is it just me or do you get that feeling you play much more solid when playing with someone very good?