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imsys0042

Country Club culture

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  1. 1. What's the culture at your private/semi-private/regular course?

    • Nice
      26
    • Stuffy
      2
    • Neither here nor there
      10
    • Rude
      2
    • Awful
      0


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No starter.   Check in at the pro shop.    Oddly enough I did technically cut in front, but it was an understandable mistake.   They had the first time, I had the second.   I got to the first tee and saw people playing in front of me, so I assumed it was my turn.

What had happened is that a third person was supposed to play with them and joined their tee time.   He decided to cut them off and go to the first tee early.   So that third person was in front of me.   Now based on what they knew at the time, they had a right to be mad because they should have been first, and I was stuck waiting in the fairway and had a slow hole.   However they started getting angry with me from the first time I was near them, and they never asked for any explanation or stated "We had the first time, we don't think you as in the right position" (or anything like that).

So I didn't think I was cutting anyone off and thought I was in the right place.   When they told me that they had the first time and were not the third group I said "I didn't mean to cut you off.   Even if I was first off, I had a couple of slow holes so I'd let you thru".   Their response, priceless, was "That's what I told you I was doing, and that's what we are doing".

Let me say this, coming from much country club experience, the early morning players at every club I have ever been a member at have traditionally been grouchy.  Why, no idea...just the way it is.  An honest mistake was made and the club should address the situation with those members.  But, if they do, if you already feel uncomfortable...you may feel even more so afterwards.  If it were me, I would seek those guys at at my earliest convenience and make an attempt to explain to them (in a mild mannered tone) what happened.  Basically, hey guys, sorry about the situation the other day but this is what happened.... If they are a$$es this time, simply tell them there is no need to be rude...again in a mild mannered tone.

I still contend, I would not let anyone run me out of a club...never have, never will.  I am a Type A personality but I have managed thru the years to rein it in.  But, it also makes me not shy away from confrontation but to move it to a reasonable conclusion.

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Let me say this, coming from much country club experience, the early morning players at every club I have ever been a member at have traditionally been grouchy.  Why, no idea...just the way it is.  An honest mistake was made and the club should address the situation with those members.  But, if they do, if you already feel uncomfortable...you may feel even more so afterwards.  If it were me, I would seek those guys at at my earliest convenience and make an attempt to explain to them (in a mild mannered tone) what happened.  Basically, hey guys, sorry about the situation the other day but this is what happened.... If they are a$$es this time, simply tell them there is no need to be rude...again in a mild mannered tone.   I still contend, I would not let anyone run me out of a club...never have, never will.  I am a Type A personality but I have managed thru the years to rein it in.  But, it also makes me not shy away from confrontation but to move it to a reasonable conclusion.

The whole crux of the matter seems to be that they thought I was pulling a fast one on them. They thought I joined onto their tee time (we have an online system), then I teed off without them and was holding them up. Which if it were true, it would be a jerk move. The pro shop explained to them that someone else had pulled the fast one and that I just happened to get to the tee before them. Our confrontation on the course gave us the chance to mostly explain what we thought and then the pro shop connected the dots for them. I'm very happy with how the club stepped in. I certainly have some level of discomfort with the attitude and behavior of some of the members. I work out of my house, have 2 small children and no one to really help with the kids so going to play golf is my thing to do and relax. Working through how I feel about the club is something I need to work on so I can enjoy the nicer people there. Everything except yelling, swearing and calling me names can be explained away to something that shouldn't have gotten that big, but hey, we're all human. However that is the one thing that they did not own up to or apologize for. I had the rotten luck to go in for lunch after the round and they came in. At the clubs request they did apologize but seemed more centered on the fact that they accused me of doing something that I wasn't instead of yelling vile words to me. I said ok, thank you for the apology and left it at that.

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The whole crux of the matter seems to be that they thought I was pulling a fast one on them. They thought I joined onto their tee time (we have an online system), then I teed off without them and was holding them up. Which if it were true, it would be a jerk move. The pro shop explained to them that someone else had pulled the fast one and that I just happened to get to the tee before them. Our confrontation on the course gave us the chance to mostly explain what we thought and then the pro shop connected the dots for them. I'm very happy with how the club stepped in.

I certainly have some level of discomfort with the attitude and behavior of some of the members. I work out of my house, have 2 small children and no one to really help with the kids so going to play golf is my thing to do and relax. Working through how I feel about the club is something I need to work on so I can enjoy the nicer people there.

Everything except yelling, swearing and calling me names can be explained away to something that shouldn't have gotten that big, but hey, we're all human. However that is the one thing that they did not own up to or apologize for. I had the rotten luck to go in for lunch after the round and they came in. At the clubs request they did apologize but seemed more centered on the fact that they accused me of doing something that I wasn't instead of yelling vile words to me.

I said ok, thank you for the apology and left it at that.

Ok...good to know that y'all faced each other afterwards.  An situation that happened to me not on the golf course but elsewhere...a guy and I got into a yelling contest with each other over something actual trivial and was a simple misunderstanding.  He thought I was wrong, I thought he was wrong.  A month or so later we became friends and remained so until he passed away.  If someone and I have words, I will go out of my way to say hello to them every single time I see them.  One of those "Hey, how are you? How's your game?"

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Ok...good to know that y'all faced each other afterwards.  An situation that happened to me not on the golf course but elsewhere...a guy and I got into a yelling contest with each other over something actual trivial and was a simple misunderstanding.  He thought I was wrong, I thought he was wrong.  A month or so later we became friends and remained so until he passed away.  If someone and I have words, I will go out of my way to say hello to them every single time I see them.  One of those "Hey, how are you? How's your game?"

All three of us are there on many Wednesday mornings. I'd not met them in person before today. I'm glad that he misunderstanding was cleared up and it doesn't have to be too awkward. I have forever removed them from my Valentine's Day card list however.

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Let me say this, coming from much country club experience, the early morning players at every club I have ever been a member at have traditionally been grouchy.

I think many of them play early b/c they hate slow pace golf.  They want to beat the crowd.

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Note: This thread is 1998 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic. Thank you!

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