Anyone else struggle when playing with friends?

[Cut68]

So my buddy and I play together often, and have 2 or three different wager's going on, be it for the round or for the year. I don't think it's how I respond to pressure, as when I play league or anyone else I'm fine, but I am playing absolutely terrible when I'm playing against him. Case in point, Thursday I shot a 96 when I had a match with him (for nothing more than a logo ball, mind you) . Today, playing with some strangers ( I was a single) a friendly Nassau popped up, for a bit more than a logo ball. I shot a 77. I don't know what's going on, but I have to get past it, because the guy's a close friend and my regular playing partner, but the rounds I play with him are leaving me frustrated and angry with myself, because I show myself on a regular basis that I can play better.

Anyone else experience anything like this?

[Topper]

I have the same problem.  Ball striking on the driving range is better than ball striking when playing alone which is better than ball striking when playing golf with friends.

Because of this, I scheduled a lesson yesterday.  I really wanted my instructor to look at my swing before my next scheduled golf outing with friends.  I told him about frequent topped and thin shots with my long game and that I took 18 strokes due to 9 mulligans off the tee the previous week when golfing with my neighbors.  And I'm not counting at least a dozen thin or topped shots on the fairway.  And wouldn't you know it, I was generally flushing the ball during the lesson with my 7i through hybrids and was OK with the driver.

He made a few adjustments but (in his words) nothing was dramatic.  However, the nature of his adjustments confirmed (in my mind) that when playing with friends, I most likely experience an increase in tension (especially grip pressure) due to my competitive nature along with a rushed swing tempo.  If one or both of these faults puts me off by a half or quarter inch, it's a thin or topped shot.  Maybe we're in the same boat.

Golf is not a game of inches.  It's a game of millimeters.  Anyway, sorry for the ramble but I do have the same problem.

[Keyser]

I have the same problem. I used to okay every 2 weeks with my brother and I would do fine ( mid to low 90's and would break into the 80's every once in a while). I then play with my old boss and some guys from work and I shoot 101 107 111. I don't know if it's psychological or what. So I took a year off golf and just started up again. Have played 2 rounds, a 94 and a 89. Now my old boss and the guys from work ant to play again. I guess we'll see if I can overcome this.

[canadiansbronco]

ME !!!!!!!!!!!

I turn horrible  when i play with my friends

[boogielicious]

Only when I play with my oldest friend from high school.  I have a good time, but I tend to rush my shots and he alway beats me.

Canadiansbronco, clever Avatar!  Habs were one goal away but Bruins got them this time for a change.

[Doctorfro]

I'm not sure I have that all the time but I do find it embarrassing when you tell your friends about your great rounds and then you post a stinker when you play with them. I shot 73 yesterday and next time I play with my friends I'll probably shoot my normal 80-82.

[bplewis24]

For those that struggle when playing with close friends, are you guys talking a lot during the round?  Whenever I spend time socializing (even if it's only between shots) I tend to play poorly.  When I play with co-workers this often happens.  But when I play with my brother I tend to play better, and it's because we're pretty competitive with each other so there's not a lot of talking going on.

Brandon

[TigerWoodsBeard]

same here

[Mizuno Guy]

Yes, when I play with my dad. He is terrible and the whole round its non stop why did I do this why did I do that, where's my ball. I thought you were good how come you hit it in the trees. After a while I cant stand it anymore.

[X-Factor611]

i used to be that way too until recently.

id go out for a round with my friend (we play at least once a week). and shoot mid to upper 80's (usually bogey golf).

I'd tell him about times i went out after work and shot 37 and 39 on nine a couple times.

Well yesterday we went and played 18 at our local course.  Front nine i was awful shooting a 47 (looked at my scorecard and saw a lot of Doubles!).  Play on the front was extremely slow too which may have been why i wasnt playing well.

but when we made the turn i was playing a lot better!  shot a 39 on the back with birdies on 10 & 16 (never had 2 birdies in a round before).

i think rather than trying to beat your friend, if you push them to do better and they do the same it makes for a better playing atmosphere.

[Callahan14]

Perhaps it isnt the "playing with friends"that hinders your game, IMO it is the caliber of player(s) you are playing with.

I play a usual $1 hole $1 birdie game with a good friend of mine on Wednesdays, we are both shooting around the same score (high 70's to low 80"s)each match and we exchange a few dollars each week. Some weeks I pay him and other weeks he pays me.

When I go play 18 holes with some younger college friends of mine that shoot in the low 70's to high 60's I usually shoot mid to low 70's. IMO the better players you play with the better you will play.

[jamo]

I probably play even better with friends. That's most likely because my friends suck though. :-P

[skates]

I use to be the same with with my good friends dad. I always thought he was really good prob around a 10 or so handicap but then I started playing golf seriously and became a better golfer than he was. But for whatever reason whenever I played with him I would go out and blow up into a 95 or something like that. Then when i would tell him I shot a 75 in a tournament he would be like ya ok. So that just added more pressure when I would play with him. But finally I was just like its just another round, I know my game and I am just going to play it and not let the bad shots effect the whole round. Just find your happy place during the round or get a catchy song stuck in your head that usually helps me get through the bad ones.

[GolfBear]

A lot of times when you play with friends you tend to relax and focus less on your game.   A combination of banter, trash talking and just having fun can pull you off your game.    You tend to focus less on the important parts of each shot and just go into a sort of autopilot "play golf" mode.

This might be one of those instances where really focusing on your pre-shot routine can help pull you back into the the scoring zone.

[mirv]

i have trouble playing with my dad a lot of the time.  not because i'm trying to impress him or am intimidated or anything, but mostly because he's a talker.  don't get me wrong, i like to keep it conversational, but my dad's entire side of the family seems to think that silence is deadly, so he will talk and talk and talk and 90% of the time it will be about absolutely nothing.  just senseless, aimless jabbering.  i'm kind of a quiet type, so when i'm with someone who just simply will not be quiet for even one minute, i get irritated/aggravated, and then my game inevitably suffers.  i've tried to gently imply like "i'd rather not talk right now, thanks," but it doesn't take, and i can't quite bring myself to say "dad, please stop talking."

[bplewis24]

Originally Posted by Mizuno Guy

Yes, when I play with my dad. He is terrible and the whole round its non stop why did I do this why did I do that, where's my ball. I thought you were good how come you hit it in the trees. After a while I cant stand it anymore.

I don't know why, but that part made me burst out laughing.  I guess I could picture somebody's dad saying that.

Brandon

[bplewis24]

Originally Posted by GolfBear

A lot of times when you play with friends you tend to relax and focus less on your game.   A combination of banter, trash talking and just having fun can pull you off your game.    You tend to focus less on the important parts of each shot and just go into a sort of autopilot "play golf" mode.

This might be one of those instances where really focusing on your pre-shot routine can help pull you back into the the scoring zone.

Yeah, this is what I was getting at with my post.  And when you're like me and don't have a pre-shot routine, it's even worse.

Brandon

[paulg]

I could only play well when playing with someone with a lower handicap than me.