girlfriend is going to uni

[ted dibiase]

If you could emotionally seperate yourself but keep the physical contact that would be the best of both worlds. Tell her that you want to see her once a month during the school year and then in the summer time. In between times just bang lots of chicks.

[motograter7]

UNI= University of Northern Illinois? in Dekalb? And you're in Chicago? The only way it takes 4 hours to get there is if you go to Davenport, IA first.

everyone, thank you so much for your input i'd love to hear more. we are talking about all these things now.

knockglock, thank you so much i really appreciate it. chichiisme, i live in chicago, she is going to western illinois uni in macomb.

[sam004]

i live in chicago, she is going to western illinois uni in macomb.

Amtrak - Go vist her once in a while on the weekends.

She can come back to visit you. Once in a while. $20 each way at the right times, to Union station. http://www.amtrak.com/timetable/june09/W24.pdf

[clubchamp]

Actually I might be able to give you a little bit positive outlook. My high school girlfriend and I went to colleges about 3 hours apart. I was on the golf team so it was a little more difficult to see each other all the time but we made it work for the entire freshman year. Than we had been togther for 3 years and we talked a lot about the future. So she transferred to my college for us and the fact she hated her college. BOOM relationship over I couldn't deal with her and she couldn't deal with me. We had totally grown into different people she wanted good grades and I wanted to party. We parted ways after that first semester. Looking back if we never went to the same college we probably would have had a chance but thats life. Theres nothing saying you won't make just a lot is stacked against you. I'd say see what happens shes 18 so theres a good chance college will change her for better or worse. Whatever you do don't become that older bf who's nuts because thats just pouring salt on the wound.

[ted dibiase]

I think I need to see a pic of this girl before I can give any sound advice.

[motograter7]

I think I need to see a pic of this girl before I can give any sound advice.

hahaha why would that matter

[ted dibiase]

trust me, I'm a 5.4 handicap, it matters.

[Shindig]

hahaha why would that matter

I'm guessing that he's of the opinion that if she's a 10, he'll give advice that involves going out of your way to be with her. And if she's a 5, he'll say the opposite.

[Klew]

my complete honest opinion....

if I knew what I know now, then, I would have banged every girl in sight that I could.

life's too short and realistically, statistically, you're not going to marry her. if you do, print this page out to call me out on it later, I will give you $1000 as a wedding gift, and I'll need to be invited to the wedding.

good luck brutha, and wrap the monkey...

[Klew]

and...if she is a 10, you're 22, you'll find more 10's and you'll prolly post some of them on the internet in questionable compromised poses...jus sayin'

[Kingfisher]

my complete honest opinion....

+1 I agree

[TakeDeadAim]

..., I just don't want her to be "the one that got away"... I know it sounds stupid but I hate this feeling. She is (so far) the best thing that's ever happened to me, and I don't want to lose it...

I had to break a relationship with the woman I was SURE was "the one" for similar reasons. I had a tremendous job opportunity elsewhere and she couldn´t move away. I was 25 and she was 26. I was destroyed for a year after it.

Turns out that four years (and a few relationships) later I met the mother of my children and who I consider so far the closest thing to a soul mate that could exist. Looking back, I can honestly say that all relationships leading up to the one I am now have had a positive adding effect on me as a person. Moral of the story... Live life to the fullest and you will always find a fun-fulfilling companion to share the ride with... do not try to limit your ride to the person that you are with.

[sp33d]

It sucks but stats dont lie. If you guys were meant to be together you will be in the future.

UNI is a pretty nice college not a ton of craziness goes down there UofI is a different story god bless college girls and their ridiculous lack of clothing, but I stray from the subject.

It is a good time for both of you to grow, meet new people, do new things etc. Plus with her out of the way you can golf more :)

But in all seriousness, you are young. If I could go back to High school/college with what I know now. The carnage would be catastrophic I would be wrecking a different chick every night. But I was stupid, and always in a relationship, I made up for it past years. But as you grow older the booty is much more elusive, and exclusive.

I take a quote from the gospel ~40 year old virgin, "Tackle that gazelle, its in our instinct."

[Fraser]

Long distance relationships just don't work.

Funny that because mine did. 3700 miles and 8hrs on a plane apart. I lasted 2 1/2yrs going back and forth every six or eight weeks and we have now been married for almost 4yrs. I was at University too.

It sucks but stats dont lie.

If the guy and his girl both want to make it work, it will.

However, I get the impression he knows it is over already...

[zeg]

Fraser, it certainly *can* work. Glad it did for you. I spent about 3 years living in Boston while my fiancee was in LA before I managed to move to the same side of the continent. Just curious, how long had you been dating prior to the long distance situation?

Odds of a long distance relationship lasting are certainly low. On the other hand, the same can be said of ANY relationship...

[Shindig]

Funny that because mine did. 3700 miles and 8hrs on a plane apart. I lasted 2 1/2yrs going back and forth every six or eight weeks and we have now been married for almost 4yrs. I was at University too.

I heard a story on the news a year or two ago about a man who fell out a 10-story window and survived. Statistically, this is incredibly unlikely. But just because it worked for someone doesn't mean I'm about to suggest someone jump out a 10-story window, much less try it myself.

[Fraser]

Just curious, how long had you been dating prior to the long distance situation?

It actually started off long distance. We 'met' through an internet forum we both participated on and started talking on email/phone/messenger. She was living near a city I went to visit about 9months after we first 'met' and we chose to meet for dinner. At that dinner we both realised how much we really had in common, had some kind of feelings for eachother off the bat and it all kicked off from there. Utterly bizarre, I still can't believe it turned out the way it did.

I heard a story on the news a year or two ago about a man who fell out a 10-story window and survived. Statistically, this is incredibly unlikely. But just because it worked for someone doesn't mean I'm about to suggest someone jump out a 10-story window, much less try it myself.

Yes, but whether or not your survive a ten story office drop is outside of your control. A relationship is something you forge and affect all on your own doing. Sure the statistics are generally against you but as I said earlier if they both want it to work hard enough it can.

There is one thing I forgot to mention, if you really want a relationship that becomes long distance to work out you've got to create an exit strategy for the long distance aspect. In my case we decided after going back and forth across the Atlantic for a year that I was going to emigrate and so that was something we aimed towards. Without that light at the end of tunnel it'd never have worked for me.

[motograter7]

fraser, yeah i kinda know its already over. idk that she's willing to give up that "party life" and i dont want to be that guy that asks her to...

what do you mean by create and exit strategy?