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1) If part of your follow-through involves reaching into your pocket for another ball, it's time to head back to the range.

2) If the GPS app on your smart phone has been giving you yardages, and at some point the screen says, "Really son; does it matter?" ; it's time to head home.

3) Golf has been called a four-hour vacation. But if you're not any good, it's a five-hour vacation!

4) A golf lesson is like a couple of stiff drinks; you have momentary euphoria, followed by confusion and a headache.

5) Anger on the course should be reserved for those who are good enough to get mad.


Golf, like the measles, should be caught young, for, if postponed to riper years, the results may be serious.  ~P.G. Wodehouse, A Mixed Threesome, 1922

Callaway AI Smoke TD Max 10.5* | Cobra Rad Tour 16.5* | Dark Speed 21* | Titleist U500 4i | T100 5-P | Vokey 50/8* F, 54/10* S,  58/10* S | Scotty Cameron Squareback 1


A lady is playing golf with Ben Hogan. On the first tee, she says to him, "Mr. Hogan, I bet my husband $100 that I can get five words out of you."

Hogan replies, "Sorry lady, you lose."


These are great! I love the one about the reason people always call me to play. It's so stinking' true.

Note: This thread is 4760 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic. Thank you!

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