I was amazed by this...

[CG031]

Okay, So today My dad, his friend, and me decide to go to this course in PA. I had never played there before, but my dad and his friend had.

We play the furthest back tees cuz my dad is a 5 handicap, and this course was only 6600 yards even from the "black" tees.

So, we're playing, enjoying our round, and on the 5th hole the group behind us meets us at the tee. They were very nice, and we simply explained to them that the people in front of us were in their mid 70's and weren't very good golfers, so the course was a little backed up because of them. So they said "okay" and we moved on.

Later on, at about the 14th hole, the 13th hole green, and the 14th hole tee run together. My dad cranked his drive out their about 310 and I hooked mine O.B. The guy who was on the green next to us says to me "You don't hit the ball far enough to be playing those tees! Your backing up the entire course!" Granted, I'm 5'6" 135 lbs. The ONLY reason this douchebag said this to me was because I am a kid at 15 years old. As I was getting into my cart, I was ready to pound the guy. The guy was like 5'8" and probably 65-70 years old and could barely walk, and he had a TERRIBLE swing.

So I get into my cart and I said "excuse me?" and he said it again. My dad stops the cart, I get out, I was like "Hey fagboy I am sorry I don't play the womens tees like you. What the **** is your handicap?"

The guy immediatley shut up.

My dad said I went overboard and told me to stop..but I think I have a right to defend myself. I am a 19 handicap, and I hit the ball consistently 235-250 off the tee.

So, who do you guys think was right or wrong here?

[jb1982]

You both were.

It was none of his business what tees you were playing from as long as you weren't slowing down play! He sounds like an ass to me. BUT.... I would agree you went over board with your response. "Fag Boy" is not a term that should be used anywhere, let alone when talking to a 65 year old. You should have just teed up your next ball and smoked it down the middle. That would have been the best way to shut the old man up.

[wigget]

distance is irrelevant. He had no business saying to you what he said; but you had no business calling him a fagboy and bringing up his handicap and/or choice of tees. Rounds of golf can be expensive. As such, you can play whatever tee you choose to, so long as you keep pace, and so can he. Who's right? Neither of you. You can't control what people might say to you, you can control your response. Not saying don't say something to him, just maybe not respond the way you did. it doesn't do any good for either of you...

[PensacolaWahoo]

If I was your dad I would kick your ass for being a stupid punk-ass kid. Yeah, you went overboard. The other guy was a jerk. Get over it. Grow up. Learn how to handle yourself and your emotions. You acted like an immature 12 year old.

[Dent]

Im the same age and i think its right to defend yourself, but i bet i woulda said something similiar to that,.... the best thing to say is "Here take my driver and I want to see you do better than that" usually he wont take the offer but if he does and cranks it down the middle your screwed.

[lamebums]

  CG031 said:

So, who do you guys think was right or wrong here?

I don't have this

particular problem, since I usually play the white tees, or close to its equivalent. Sometimes I'll hit from the blue tees if they are close to each other, and the blue tees are closer to the cart path/on top of a hill. However, you should never have to take shit from someone like that. I would have thought however, that your father would be more likely to stand up for you, as well. If someone tried that with me I would really lay into them, doubly so if he's 70+.

[CG031]

I see some of your guys point but some of you guys just dont get it. People look at you as a 15 year old and say "he cant hit the ball far" and that really bothers me. I bet I could hit it further then him...he had no right in saying what tees I was playing, and I was already frustrated by the fact I hit it O.B. and I was playing like shit...I don't know, I shouldnt have been cursing at him but like Dent said you have to defend yourself in a situation like that. It wasn't like the guy was trying to be nice by saying this to me or recommending that I play a different tee. He was completely getting in my face and yelling at me about it.

[jb1982]

I do still understand what it's like to be 15. I'm only 25 and I remember how some of the older people on the course treated me when I was your age. And I may have responded the same way you did (when I was 15). But as you get older, you realize that it really isn't worth it and by yelling back at him and cursing all you did was continue to give younger golfers a bad name. Now that 65 year old is going to be in the clubhouse talking about what a lack of respect the young golfers on that course have for their elders. By cursing at him (most of all calling him "fag boy") you just helped lower the respect that he will have for young golfers the next time he's on the course.

Sometimes you have to take the high road. I still have problems with that myself though!

[srjorion]

  CG031 said:

People look at you as a 15 year old and say "he cant hit the ball far" and that really bothers me.

People are going to say a lot of things about you throughout your entire life. You have to learn not to care about what people say or think about you.

I'm all about standing up for myself, but one of the best ways to get back at someone who fires a round your way is to just smile and say "Have a nice day mister." You come across as having class, and they come across as looking like a jerk. How was your round after this incident by the way? I've seen similar situations and when someone let things get to them they usually took a few holes to get back in the game. Just curious if you were able to stay focused or if the next few holes didn't go as well.

[CG031]

  srjorion said:

People are going to say a lot of things about you

No, I def. lost a lot of my focus. It was on like the last few holes so I ended up going like +2 through those 3 or 4 holes.

[Clubswinger21]

I just think it sounds dumb to call a 70 yearold man "fag boy".. anyways I would of just said something like "at least I dont play from the ladies tees grandpa". Maybe I would of thrown in a "hey *******" or "douche bag". Either way buddy is probably just mad at your youth cuz he's going to die in 5 years. You probably shouldnt have said "fagboy" though.

[P3R3]

Congrats you acted like a 15 year old, if you want to be treated as an adult you need to learn to act right. When you encounter crokedy grumpy old men on the golf course just smile and move on, that's what I do. Who gives a #$%# what that guy had to say? Cuss him out in your head, don't say anything aloud.

[Q.Q.Quillume]

  CG031 said:

My dad said I went overboard and told me to stop..but I think I have a right to defend myself. I am a 19 handicap, and I hit the ball consistently 235-250 off the tee.

Well, it's for sure you were wrong since your dad said you went overboard and told you to stop.

I'd have to hear "fagman's" side of the story before deciding whether he was wrong, too. There are always two sides to every story and your side doesn't sound very good.

[lamebums]

As one of the younger guys on the course, I receive my share of shit from old people simply...being younger, I suppose. By all means, lay into the guy.

[dayll]

I'm with Pennsacola Wahoo here - while the old guy was out of line I'm never comfortable with young guys getting in the face of older guys. I was raised to ALWAYS give way and respect to age - maybe I was raised wrong but I think you failed to handle the situation with grace. d.

[ActionJackson]

The only thing worse than being a 15 year old is being a 21 year old who looks like a 15 year old and works in law-enforcement, which is me. I understand your frustration and the elderly gentlemen from your side of the story does sound quite rude. However your reaction is something I would personally be embarassed about if I was your father, not only was it disrespectful to an elder but it also used a homphobic slur which is innapropriate in any situation. The best come back would have been to ignore him not give him the satifaction of a reaction, tee it up again and get him back through your actions not your words. Trust me at work I deal with drunks and just plain "scum" on a daily basis, there are plenty of times I would rather go off but as I have maturred I have found that emotional discipline is much more rewarding and it's much more entertaining to let them go off and look stupid all by themselves than to join in and create a two man show.

-Adam J.

[WhiplashSmile]

Sounds like a no class move on both sides of the fence to me. I really can't stand to see people lose their cool on the golf course. I have a very stressful job and I play this game to get my head together and relax.

The guy that made the comment was definitely in the wrong. But, your father is correct. You went way across the line. The thing is that I'll bet you , while being angry for being insulted, knew that you probably crossed the line. Otherwise, you wouldn't have asked. Trust your head.

My other big hobby is expensive firearms. I am always carrying something, yes even on the course. If either of these comments would have been made to me my reaction would have been..."you're absolutely right. Thanks so much" Then I would have turned around and made every effort to forget about the a$$hole I just encountered. Not one time would any kind of confrontation came to mine. What could it possibly profit me to get into an altercation with some idiot on a golf course?

[CG031]

Ok i went a little overboard..but i just asked me dad what i said because i kind of lost it and I actually never said "fag boy " lol..I just said "What the F--- is your handicap?" and a bunch of other stuff like "Why does it matter what tees I play?"

i thought i siad fagboy but i actually didn't. glad i didnt too.

you guys are no doubtly right in that i was totally wrong to blow up on the dude...BUT, i think most of you at my age would have done the exact same thing, whether you'd regret it or not idk, but i know for a fact most people here would not do as what they are saying. (believe me its very hard not too after you've had a rough day scoring wise and the guy is DEMANDING you play a different tee)