Jump to content
IGNORED

The Internet Adjustment Formula

Slice of Life

By Slice of Life,
in Golf Talk

 Share
Note: This thread is 3885 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic. Thank you!

Recommended Posts

cipher Super Member

cipher

315.925 yds! Everyone should make sure they follow the correct order to solve the problem Solve all equations in parenthesis All multiplication/division left to right All addition/ subtraction left to right

I did not have any issues with the math myself...

Nate

:pxg:(10.5) :benhogan:(4W):titleist:U500(3UI) :benhogan: Icon(4-PW) :edel:(52/58)

:odyssey:Putter :snell: MTB Black  

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1
1

nick1998bunker Great Member

nick1998bunker

C[quote name="cipher" url="/t/69746/the-internet-adjustment-formula#post_892279"] I did not have any issues with the math myself...[/quote] congratulations! I was worried some folks may have forgotten as a lot of them probably haven't been in school for 60 years. Also what does the E in eps stand for?
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Pretzel Super Member

Pretzel

C congratulations! I was worried some folks may have forgotten as a lot of them probably haven't been in school for 60 years. Also what does the E in eps stand for?

It basically is a measure of how full of yourself you are on the Internet. Also, 60 years? That's exaggerating a wee bit, don't you think?

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1

  • Moderator
boogielicious Incredible Member

boogielicious

  • Moderator

OMFG I DIDN'T SEE THAT UNTIL NOW.

HAHAHAHA, literally just belly laughed by myself in my living room. I can't take credit for it, it's gotta be Erik's doing. And it's absolutely staying.

You've been forum "Punked"!

Scott

Titleist, Edel, Scotty Cameron Putter, Snell - AimPoint - Evolvr - MirrorVision

My Swing Thread

boogielicious - Adjective describing the perfect surf wave

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1
1

Slice of Life Great Member

Slice of Life

  • Author

C

congratulations! I was worried some folks may have forgotten as a lot of them probably haven't been in school for 60 years. Also what does the E in eps stand for?

EPS stands for Electronic Penis Size, which is also known as the DDL, Digital Dong Length. It refers to the length of one's internet peen.

Ryan M
 
The Internet Adjustment Formula:
IAD = ( [ADD] * .96 + [EPS] * [1/.12] ) / (1.15)
 
IAD = Internet Adjusted Distance (in yards)
ADD = Actual Driver Distance (in yards)
EPS = E-Penis Size (in inches)
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1

Slice of Life Great Member

Slice of Life

  • Author

How about a formula for claimed putts per round. Everyone shoots a respectable score, but couldn't putt to save their life!

Haven't thought about that one...

I don't think that's exaggerated enough to warrant a formula. I think people really do suck at putting...I see it first hand on a weekly basis.

God knows I've seen waaaaay more 4 putts than I have 350 yard drives.

Ryan M
 
The Internet Adjustment Formula:
IAD = ( [ADD] * .96 + [EPS] * [1/.12] ) / (1.15)
 
IAD = Internet Adjusted Distance (in yards)
ADD = Actual Driver Distance (in yards)
EPS = E-Penis Size (in inches)
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1

Slice of Life Great Member

Slice of Life

  • Author
Idk, tiger woods is perennially a top putter, and he frequently blames his score on "missed opportunities"

I mean, we could determine a formula for what your score would be if you putted well based on the EPS. The larger the EPS, the more likely you would be to blame putting...since you always drive it 330 straight down the middle.

I'm thinking something like this:

IAS = Internet Adjusted Score (What you would score if you could putt well)

AS = Actual Score

EPS = E-Penis Size

IAS = ( [ AS ] * .96 + [ 221.616 * ( 1 / EPS ) ] ) / (1.5)

So, let's say for with an actual score of 87, and an EPS of 12", your internet adjusted score would actually be rounded up to a 68. Not bad, you just broke par, and saved 19 strokes due to better putting!

But with an actual score of 87, and an EPS of 5.7", your internet adjusted score would go to an 82. Which means with better putting you could have saved 5 strokes.

I haven't checked all the math to make sure this is valid, but it's just a rough draft.

Ryan M
 
The Internet Adjustment Formula:
IAD = ( [ADD] * .96 + [EPS] * [1/.12] ) / (1.15)
 
IAD = Internet Adjusted Distance (in yards)
ADD = Actual Driver Distance (in yards)
EPS = E-Penis Size (in inches)
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1

Slice of Life Great Member

Slice of Life

  • Author

BTW, to make for easier calculations, I've simplified the algebra.

To find your Internet Adjusted Distance (IAD), you can use the formula: 

 IAD = ( 0.834783 * ADD ) + ( 7.24638 * EPS )

And to find your Internet Adjusted Score (IAS), you can use the formula: 

 IAS = ( 0.64 * AS ) + ( 147.744 / EPS )
Ryan M
 
The Internet Adjustment Formula:
IAD = ( [ADD] * .96 + [EPS] * [1/.12] ) / (1.15)
 
IAD = Internet Adjusted Distance (in yards)
ADD = Actual Driver Distance (in yards)
EPS = E-Penis Size (in inches)
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1

butt3r3dt0ast Well Established Member

butt3r3dt0ast

BTW, to make for easier calculations, I've simplified the algebra.

To find your Internet Adjusted Distance (IAD), you can use the formula:

IAD = ( 0.834783 * ADD ) + ( 7.24638 * EPS )

And to find your Internet Adjusted Score (IAS), you can use the formula:

IAS = ( 0.64 * AS ) + ( 147.744 / EPS )

This is outrageous, haha! What would your boss say if he knew what you were up to :whistle: (Assuming you have one..)

In the Bag:
:titleist: 913 D3 - 9.5* - Diamana Stiff 62g
:mizuno: MP 64s 3-PW - DGS300
:cleveland: CG12 52* & 56*
:tmade: Rosa

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Slice of Life Great Member

Slice of Life

  • Author

This is outrageous, haha! What would your boss say if he knew what you were up to  (Assuming you have one..)

I'm an engineer...it's what I do.

They don't care as long as I get my work done. Haha.

Ryan M
 
The Internet Adjustment Formula:
IAD = ( [ADD] * .96 + [EPS] * [1/.12] ) / (1.15)
 
IAD = Internet Adjusted Distance (in yards)
ADD = Actual Driver Distance (in yards)
EPS = E-Penis Size (in inches)
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1

rkim291968 Super Member

rkim291968

I'm an engineer...it's what I do.

They don't care as long as I get my work done. Haha.

The formula was a dead giveaway, Slice.   (I am in Sillycon [sic]  Valley, managing - can you guess - a team of engineers. ;-) )

RiCK

(Play it again, Sam)

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1

Slice of Life Great Member

Slice of Life

  • Author

The formula was a dead giveaway, Slice.   (I am in Sillycon [sic]  Valley, managing - can you guess - a team of engineers. )

To take it even further, using advanced mathematics, we can estimate the largest ratio of IAD to ADD that one may find acceptable to use. I call this the MPEV Theorem (Max Penal Exaggeration Value).

We take the double integral of the IAD formula (both from 0 to 1, 1 being as full of shit as one can possibly be) with respect to ADD and EPS. Doing this gives us a value of approximately 1.92.

Thus, the maximum IAD value would be equal to 1.92 * ADD. So for someone who drives the ball 215 yards, their maximum IAD would be about 413 yards. Monster internet drive. Any larger than that, and the e-penis becomes unstable.

Ryan M
 
The Internet Adjustment Formula:
IAD = ( [ADD] * .96 + [EPS] * [1/.12] ) / (1.15)
 
IAD = Internet Adjusted Distance (in yards)
ADD = Actual Driver Distance (in yards)
EPS = E-Penis Size (in inches)
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1
1

Lihu Incredible Member

Lihu

Surprised there no differential equations or laplacians involved. :-) :-) :-)

:ping:  :tmade:  :callaway:   :gamegolf:  :titleist:

TM White Smoke Big Fontana; Pro-V1
TM Rac 60 TT WS, MD2 56
Ping i20 irons U-4, CFS300
Callaway XR16 9 degree Fujikura Speeder 565 S
Callaway XR16 3W 15 degree Fujikura Speeder 565 S, X2Hot Pro 20 degrees S

"I'm hitting the woods just great, but I'm having a terrible time getting out of them." ~Harry Toscano

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1

rkim291968 Super Member

rkim291968

Surprised there no differential equations or laplacians involved.

Don't encourage SOL.   He may completely lose us with differential equations and I hate to get my Calculus book out from attic.

RiCK

(Play it again, Sam)

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Awards, Achievements, and Accolades
1
1
1
1

Note: This thread is 3885 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic. Thank you!

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share
Go to topic listing


  • Want to join this community?

    We'd love to have you!

    Sign Up

  • TST Partners

    TourStriker PlaneMate
    Golfer's Journal
    ShotScope
    The Stack System
    FlightScope Mevo
    Direct: Mevo, Mevo+, and Pro Package.

    Coupon Codes (save 10-15%): "IACAS" for Mevo/Stack, "IACASPLUS" for Mevo+/Pro Package, and "THESANDTRAP" for ShotScope.

  • Posts

    • Darkfrog
      "5 Minutes Daily" Practice Challenge

      By Darkfrog ·

      Day 12: Same as last couple days, but focus was on recentering aspect of flow. When I recenter earlier I make decent contact most swings but if I recenter late or not at all it’s a roll of the dice. 
    • pganapathy
      A Novice Journey to Building a Bag. (Help Appreciated)

      By pganapathy ·

      A couple of things.  Some of the clubs in your bag should be dropped immediately.  A 2-iron for example with what obviously seems to be a lower swing speed or possibly not great swing yet is a definite no-no.  To be hitting that 120-140 yards, which I assume includes run, is a sign that you are not getting the ball airborne at the correct angle to maximise distance.  The reason your 3 and 5 hybrid are going the same distance is that your launch angle is better with the 5.  Loft is your friend. Ideally I would suggest going to a golf or sporting store where you can hit golf balls on a simulator without being disturbed to understand your club carry distances and hopefully swing speed.  With that information we can definitely guide you better.
    • pganapathy
      Is This Club Blatantly Sandbagging?

      By pganapathy ·

      Let us be clear, unless you have proof of cheating, you just sound like a case of sour grapes.  In our club we have a guy who won club titles for many years.  Yes, he was a low single digit handicapper, but there have been quite a few others who played at his level.  Yet his mental strength and experience helped him win in many years when he shouldn't have.  Did he sandbag.  DEFINITELY NOT.  Did he just minimize his mistakes and pull out shots as and when needed.  Definitely.
    • DaHolla
      "5 Minutes Daily" Practice Challenge

      By DaHolla ·

      Day 111 - Worked on my grip and higher hands in the backswing. Full swings with the PRGR. 
    • retoid
      A Novice Journey to Building a Bag. (Help Appreciated)

      By retoid ·

      First off please forgive me if this is not a proper post or not in the proper location, still learning the ropes around here. Second, it's important that I mention I am very new to the game with only about 10 rounds of golf under my belt, most being 9 holes. Only this year have I started playing 18. That being said, I am hooked, love the game and am very eager to learn and improve. To give you an idea of my skill, the last 2 18 rounds I played were 110 and 105. Not great at all, however I am slowly improving as I learn. Had been having bad slicing issues with the driver and hybrids but after playing some more and hitting the range, I've been able to improve on that quite a bit and have been hitting more straight on average. Irons have always come easier to me as far as hitting straight for some reason. Wedges have needed a lot of improvement, but I practice chipping about 20-30 mins about 3-5 times a week and that's helped a lot. Today I went to the range and started to note down some distance data, mind you I am averaging the distances based off my best guess compared to the distance markers on the range. I do not currently own a range finder or tracker. From reading some similar posts I do understand that filling gaps is ideal, but I am having a some issues figuring out those gaps and understanding which clubs to keep and remove as some gaps are minimal between clubs. Below is an image of the chart I put together showing the clubs and average distances I've been hitting and power applied. For some reason I am hitting my hybrids around the same distances and I am not sure why. Wondering if one of them should be removed. I didn't notice a huge loft difference either. The irons I have are hand me downs from my grandfather and after playing with them a bit, I feel like they're just not giving me what could potentially be there. The feel is a bit hard/harsh and underwhelming if that makes sense and I can't seem to get decent distances from them. Wondering if I should be looking to invest in some more updated irons and if those should be muscle backs or cavity backs? My knowledge here is minimal. I have never played with modern fairway woods, only the classic clubs that are actually wood and much smaller than modern clubs. I recently removed the 4 and 5 woods from my bag as I was never using them and I don't hit them very well or very far. Wondering if I should look into some more modern fairway wood options? I appreciate any feedback or advice anyone is willing to give, please forgive my lack of knowledge. I am eager to learn! Thank you.  
×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

Welcome to TST! Signing up is free, and you'll see fewer ads and can talk with fellow golf enthusiasts! By using TST, you agree to our Terms of Use, our Privacy Policy, and our Guidelines.

  I accept
The popup will be closed in 10 seconds...