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heyscuba

favorite golf line while playing,...

110 posts in this topic

I think we should list our favorite funny lines used on the course during play,...

If you add, copy and past the whole list with your at the end to make it easier to read.

1, I think you're standing to close to the ball,.......... after it's been hit.
(after someone nubs one off the tee)

2,
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My new favorite. I couldnt stop saying it this weekend on saturday and sunday when we played. (I stole this from someone here).

After a massive shot..we yelled "Pow!!" or "Bamm"

just like my idol Jack Hamm
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My fav is when you hit a ugly shot, but it turns out to be okay. "Well she was ugly but had big tats"

"If you hit a good shot, you should be okay"
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I thought a different guy started this thread. I think this gentleman must have set up a 2nd account. BUt anywho, back on topic.

I must say "One Time" 10 times a round when my playing partners are putting in hopes they 1 putt.
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I thought a different guy started this thread. I think this gentleman must have set up a 2nd account. BUt anywho, back on topic.

Most of what I say isn't pre-loaded funny, it's either random off-the-cuff-funny, or it's motitvational (same as what you do). I guess my most used phrase is "No problem, up and down, chip and a putt." I say that when someone is noticeably agitated after missing the green.

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Only when playing with my close friends ...

(After a duff)
"Wow, you really hit the sh*t outta that one"

(After a wicked slice way OB or two fairways over and an uncomfortable pause)
"You'll have a shot in from there"
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My brother has a good short game, all his putts seem to go in. So I like to say my favorite line from Happy Gilmore. "You will not make this putt....... Jackass!"
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My new favorite. I couldnt stop saying it this weekend on saturday and sunday when we played. (I stole this from someone here).

That is probably the best one, I use it all the time. If you really cant get enough jack Hamn jokes you guys should check out the "hammer" thread.

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My new favorite. I couldnt stop saying it this weekend on saturday and sunday when we played. (I stole this from someone here).

Those sound more like the old school Batman sound effect and visuals.
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Only when playing with my close friends ...

So cruel.....so dang funny, too.

I was told this the other day when I belted a drive that turned hard right....sailed over clear outa the hole into a snakey place that I wussed out and dared not enter.
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After the big double bogey or worse just say that was a Paris Hilton,when they ask what you are talking about say (man that was a expensive ho)
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I actually thought about starting a thread like this, because this guy said something pretty funny to me the other day ...

I crushed a drive long and straight (I think it measured out at 290 or so) and the middle-aged guy that I was playing with said, "Wow! That one will make the girls chase you!"
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I was playing in a tournament last year when I lipped out about as hard as you can on a putt, full 360 around the cup. When one of my competitors comments "Wow, that one came back around and kicked you in the nuts." I got a good laugh out of that one.
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When, after a few holes, your opponent is getting the better of you, ask him/her, "Do you inhale or exhale on your backswing?" Works most every time. If not, remark while he's on the tee, "Isn't it amazing how your shadow never seems to bother you?"
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When, after a few holes, your opponent is getting the better of you, ask him/her, "Do you inhale or exhale on your backswing?" Works most every time. If not, remark while he's on the tee, "Isn't it amazing how your shadow never seems to bother you?"

Mind games, I like it.

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