Confessions of a hacker

[B-Con]

I knew that because HI of 99.9 doesn't exist if I am correct

Technically, yes. The USGA says that the

HI is supposed to stop at 36.4 for men. If you took an average of 10 hits per hole you'd be roughly a 100 HI. Maybe a first-time player with no practice who kept honest score would post something like that.

[Ruckus]

Last night was a culmination of 3 straight weeks of frustration. I came home from the range and said I was done with golf, not just in a dejected way, but in a "I'm going to put my clubs on Craigslist for $28, first one takes it" kinda way. Watch for my new updated handicap in the coming weeks, it's not gonna be pretty.

P.S. I was mini-gunning balls last night... 120 in 30 minutes. I hate this game.

[JetFan1983]

Haha Zeph you just got major brownie points from me for this thread. Well done.

It's going to be a rude awakening when I play golf for the first time in a year. Albeit, playing golf again is going to be an extremely happy day for me, no matter what the results.

My hacker confession: When you weren't looking, I improved my lie.

[WUTiger]

I can't play golf Every third hole I can; popular scramble partner
I hit 90% of my shots fat 40% fat or thin
I hit the ground with my driver when swinging If I really miss one
I hit my PW 110 yards about right
I can hit my driver 240 yards, but usually 190 and sky-high Misses vary
I hit my 7i 150 yards Try 140
I finish on my toes and fall forward No, I chase ball slightly to left
I chunk when chipping Blade 1 of 10; rest pretty good
I shoot in the 90s Lately yes; pre-2005 broke 90 half the time
I have fun when playing, but want to quit after most rounds or practices Let's not go there!
I swing too long, too hard, too fast I hit overswing streaks about twice a round
I've once broken 90 Actually broke 80 twice - when I was younger
I think I know more about the swing than I really do Really quite knowledgeable; I just can't repeat it consistently
I've gotten rid of my slice, only to exchange it for a hook Can miss either way
I lack most swing fundamentals Pretty good on static parts; gets exciting during swing - timing is biggest problem
I try to hit the ball I get several excellent shots a round; the misses are... just that
I lose balls all the time Varies week by week
I'm not a good short game player, or putter, it just seems so because my long game stinks Most days pretty good; I need those one-putt bogies!

[O.B. Right]

Im so bad that I pick up the ball and quit on at least 12 holes a round. My score card usually looks like this:
X, 7, 7, X, X, 8, X, 5 . . .where X means "too many strokes so I quit or just tossed the ball onto the green and putted"

[SSJLaletas]

Im so bad that I pick up the ball and quit on at least 12 holes a round. My score card usually looks like this:

Those rounds just suck, they really do, I feel for you man.

[Bullitt5339]

I can't play golf But I always look like I can
I hit 90% of my shots fat Thin here
I hit the ground with my driver when swinging Rarely
I hit my PW 110 yards Exactly
I can hit my driver 240 yards, but usually 190 and sky-high I knock satellites out of orbit
I hit my 7i 150 yards Exactly
I finish on my toes and fall forward heels for me
I chunk when chipping I'm 50/50 chunk or thin over the green
I shoot in the 90s most of the time
I have fun when playing, but want to quit after most rounds or practices never thought about quitting, I'm stubborn and swear next time will be better
I swing too long, too hard, too fast working on that problem seriously right now
I've once broken 90 a few times, but not enough
I think I know more about the swing than I really do I have no clue
I've gotten rid of my slice, only to exchange it for a hook but not enough to work on fixing it
I lack most swing fundamentals I'm sure I do also
I try to hit the ball I succeed most of the time
I lose balls all the time even when I see exactly where they went
I'm not a good short game player, or putter, it just seems so because my long game stinks exactly opposite here, short game is the worst

[Meddle]

Great list, I totally relate!

I can't play golf Yep. At least not when I'm <100 from the green
I hit 90% of my shots fat Totally. Not really fat, but the kind that takes 10 yards off your irons
I hit the ground with my driver when swinging Actually don't do that. But I miss the sweet spot all the time
I hit my PW 110 yards More like 125, but it's lofted 45*
I can hit my driver 240 yards Embarrassingly, I hit it 275 and still suck at this game
I hit my 7i 150 yards 165 but my seven is lofted low too. Hitting it far is the only thing I can do.
I finish on my toes and fall forward It does happen.
I chunk when chipping Yep.
I shoot in the 90s Average about 95 a round.
I have fun when playing, but want to quit after most rounds or practices I guess I enjoy pain because I keep coming back for more.
I swing too long, too hard, too fast If I had to describe my swing in one sentence it would be this
I've once broken 90 A few times, shot 81 once when I was really hot
I think I know more about the swing than I really do Haha I try not to be that guy but deep down am
I've gotten rid of my slice, only to exchange it for a hook I relate to this more than anything, totally
I lack most swing fundamentals I go past parallel, move my head, sway my hips some. Hogan would disapprove.
I try to hit the ball One of my swing thoughts
I lose balls all the time Every now and then I hit a 50 yard slice into the driving range
I'm not a good short game player, or putter, it just seems so because my long game stinks Other way around for me. Descent long game, at least compared to my short game.

[B-Con]

I have to add:

• The only club in my bag that I actually don't fear pulling out is my 9i. Anything longer and I might lose control, anything shorter and I fear skulling the ball.

[Gareth]

When people ask my handicap i say: "The clubs". (ooold joke)

However, The range will normally have mats. The mats are very forgiving compared to whatever lie you deal with on the course. Try to practice on the course if you can. This involves mid-week golf! Replace all divots etc. You all know this. :)

[Travtex]

Heh!

I can't play golf (More frustratingly, I CAN play golf... about once or twice a round.)
I hit 90% of my shots fat (More prone to thin.)
I hit the ground with my driver when swinging (I do this with practice swings more than real swings, oddly.)
I hit my PW 110 yards (120-ish, 48*)
I can hit my driver 240 yards, but usually 190 and sky-high (In the same round, I've hit a 310 and a 40yd pop-up. Sickeningly inconsistent.)
I hit my 7i 150 yards (Round the 160 range)
I finish on my toes and fall forward (Lose my balance back more often than forward.)
I chunk when chipping (Gawd, yes. And blade it right over the green.)
I shoot in the 90s (Not yet.)
I have fun when playing, but want to quit after most rounds or practices (I usually get mad mid-round and finish just strong enough to keep me coming back, hah.)
I swing too long, too hard, too fast (Been getting this under control, lately.)
I've once broken 90 (Not yet.)
I think I know more about the swing than I really do (I think I know exactly jack about my swing, hah.)
I've gotten rid of my slice, only to exchange it for a hook (Vice-versa. Started with a hook, developed a slice, got my hook back.)
I lack most swing fundamentals (Actually, every lesson I've taken has garnered me swing compliments. Yet I still suck.)
I try to hit the ball (Like it owes me money.)
I lose balls all the time (I think I give up too soon. Yay cheap balls. "Nah, that one's gone.")
I'm not a good short game player, or putter, it just seems so because my long game stinks (I've three-putted for par.)

[ET-Taylor]

I have to add:

Ive hooked 3 consecutive irons OB from the fairway and the green isn't a difficult green to get to straight in front no danger yet I duck hooked the ball three times coming down the last

[Travtex]

Ive hooked 3 consecutive irons OB from the fairway and the green isn't a difficult green to get to straight in front no danger yet I duck hooked the ball three times coming down the last

Augh. I did a similar with my 3 wood. Playing 9 at my soon-to-be-former home course, on the second shot at the Par 5 9th I hit a lovely arcing 3w shot directly push-left into the duck pond. Was a lateral hazard, but I wanted to see if I could work the shot out since I wasn't keeping score anyway (One of those early newb rounds where you say 'Screw it' by about hole four.). Popped an identical shot directly into the same duck pond. Giving up on my 3w, I went back to my bag and pulled my usually reliable 22* 5-iron... right into the same duck pond. Wasn't even a BIG duck pond, I think the green was actually a bigger target.

Maddening thing about it, is on the SAME DAY I'd skulled three consecutive shots about ten feet into a creek right in front of me. By the time of the Duck Pond Incident I was pretty sure I was doing it on purpose.

[Chief Broom]

If you took an average of 10 hits per hole you'd be roughly a 100 HI. Maybe a first-time player with no practice who kept honest score would post something like that.

I play regularly with a couple of caddies from the Augusta National. The story out there is that one time an Englishman came in and had never played golf before and shot the course record of 245. I can't imagine having the patience to see something like that through. At least the caddie got paid for it...

[Range King]

I am royally enjoying this thread

[luckyluke699]

Technically, yes. The USGA says that the

28.0 for men in the UK!

Personally I think the max should be 36 for men and women to allow under the UK CONGU system as well (for up to 2 extra shots on all holes)... but then again I also think the USGA system is much better than the CONGU handicapping system in general.

[pxc]

If you took an average of 10 hits per hole you'd be roughly a 100 HI. Maybe a first-time player with no practice who kept honest score would post something like that.

Haha, luckily I'm not quite that bad.

[B-Con]

I can't imagine having the patience to see something like that through. At least the caddie got paid for it...

Wow. I can't believe either of them had the patience to finish.