idiot rant

[Jay-Bird]

rant about on-course idiots you encounter...

I played alone the other day, but I was playing a serious round. The 4th hole is a par 5, dog leg left. The course is designed so the right side of the 4th runs parallel to the right side of the 2nd. Anyway, I hit a huge-long drive but pushed it right. It flew the rough and mounds between the two fairways and landed in rough in front of the start of the 2nd fairway.

There was a group on #2 tee. It took me a while to walk to my ball - which landed about 295 yards from my tee, but about 170 from #2 tee. As I'm walking to my ball I see the guys from hole 2 drive their carts in the direction of my ball.

One guy drives over the the EXACT point that I watched mine down, he gets out, walks to my ball, bends down and picks it up and quickly puts it in his pocket.

The whole time I'm waving my arms over my head and yelling "MINE - - That's mine. Hey, that's MY BALL!!!"

He ignores me. He scurries over to his ball, hacks it back into his fairway and starts back toward his cart. By this time, I'm at the scene of the crime.

I yell to him - "Hey did you see my ball?"
him: "NO."
me: "A Callaway Tour ix seven, with a black line around it."
him: "Oh, I did pick up a Callaway, man you hit that a long way."
me: "Didn't you see my waving my arms?"
him: "Yeah, I didn't know what you were saying"
me: "Wasn't it obvious!? Please don't ever pick up a ball that's in play without being certain it's a lost bal l."
end of rant.

[wedge player]

man i know wat mean i hate people pickin up my ball and completely gone when i get there

[pweenie]

Valid rant. Was it a muni course?

[CG031]

I know exactly what you are talking about. My friends always say "oh just pocket it" but I generally ALWAYS leave the ball there if I see ANYONE around with the POSSIBILITY of it being their ball.

What a tool that guy was.

[Msokol13]

If its not mine I dont touch it. That sucks man...you should have kicked him in his balls.

[apex53]

I laughed when I read this, not because it happened to you, just the fact that people can be incredibly stupid... this has happened to me before too, just amazing that people don't have a clue... you have to wonder what in the hell these people are thinking and how they have made it this far without someone kicking the shit out of them

[Orange]

Today I was playing a hole and my shot was far right, sharing the rough of another hole going the opposite direction. A group about 50 yards past this one ball was stopped and one of their players was hitting their ball there. I saw a ball by me (still 50 yards from them), and I picked it up. Then right after that one person hit they came back looking for a ball. I asked what kind of ball they were looking for and the guy said "I dunno what it was." I said, "Was it a Nike?" -- "Yeah, yeah, that was it."

I told him I was sorry that I picked up his ball, he said don't worry about it. It was no more than 100 yards from their tee box so I figured they would have seen it and not passed it in the first place...

[shades9323]

Today I was playing a hole and my shot was far right, sharing the rough of another hole going the opposite direction. A group about 50 yards past this one ball was stopped and one of their players was hitting their ball there. I saw a ball by me (still 50 yards from them), and I picked it up. Then right after that one person hit they came back looking for a ball. I asked what kind of ball they were looking for and the guy said "I dunno what it was." I said, "Was it a Nike?" -- "Yeah, yeah, that was it."

Who doesn't know what ball they are playing?

[lordhamster]

I mark my balls with a huge red sharpie X on both sides. Essentially 1/4 of the surface of my ball is covered in red ink. Yet somehow morons are constantly picking up my ball. They must be thinking they hit the ball so hard they whacked a new mark onto it.

[lumpuckeroo]

I really don't like when that happens, nothing frustrates me more.

[Golfing Dad]

My son and I were playing yesterday and we caught up to the group ahead of us. It was a foursome and they had carts. My son and I were walking. It was obvious they were new to the game (newer than my son and I), as we watched them finishing up the par three hole, BOTH GROUPS DROVE THEIR GOLF CARTS ONTO THE GREEN to be close to their balls. One player hopped out, hit is four or five puts then the next one thing the same thing and so on.

The next hole they were parked just off the back of the green, one cart was behind the other. The group in the cart in the back hopped into their cart when they were done and drove onto the green to pass the other cart.

I pulled out my cell phone and called the clubhouse and told them what I was witnessing and to send the marshall.

The next hole, two of the guys hit their balls OB into the desert. These morons drove their carts past the "KEEP CARTS OUT OF DESERT" sign to look for their ball. The marshall came up and told the groups it was time to turn their carts in and they left.

I had figured these guys were new to golf and didn't know the rules about carts. When I got back to the clubhouse the marshall told me that he has seen that group before.

[ugottabjoshinme]

I am playing a round as a single and am joined by another single. The hole we are playing has a hole running parallel in the opposite direction. The other hole is shorter, with the green say half way between our tee box and the point we would be hitting our second shot.

We are walking past the green and there are a couple of guys looking for a ball.

Guy says to me: I can't find my Maxfli, did you guys see a Maxfli anywhere?
Me: No, I did not see anything.

We get up to our second shot and my playing partner looks at me and says: That guy can't find his Maxfli because its in my pocket.

There are some people out there that I will just never understand.

[imtomtomim]

I hate that. I had this jerk pick up my ball twice in a row. Both great shots. Once after I drove right around 300 but missed the green to the right like 15 yards. He picks up the shot and another ball he found. (mind you this is a rich ass doctor that my partner has met before). I was pissed because I told him what my ball looked like and he said, hmm, no I didn't see it and then scuttled off real quick. Anyways, I drop a ball where he picked it up and just played on from there. Then, next tee box, I hit a great shot to the left side of the fairway, around 280 ish, hits something funny in the fairway and takes a hard kick left pretty close to the 9th tee box. Anyways, I yell at him, don't touch that, whistle really loud, scream. SOB picks it up again. By this time, I told him exactly how I mark my ball and such and my partner says I'd hurry over to him if I were you. So, I double time it over there and I say, have you seen my ball, green line down the side. By this time, he's probably realized i know I saw him bend over and take it and he pulls it out of his pocket and drops it on the floor. Yeah, it's right there. then scuttles off with a brisk pace. What a jerk.

[mirv]

about six weeks ago, i was playing in the evening by myself and having one of my best rounds in memory. for the first nine, i had been behind two guys in a cart (i was also in a cart), but they were playing fast and keeping good pace in front of me so there never was more than a minute or two of waiting, and that only a couple of times.

however at the turn, they left the cart and decided to walk the back nine. well, i still had my cart, and so i'm waiting for several minutes on number ten to hit. i smash it right up the fairway, drive out... wait so i can make my approach, and i'm thinking "surely they'll let me go through on 11."

they didn't.

"surely they'll let me go through on 12."

they didn't.

"SURELY they'll let me go through on 13."

they didn't. and on 13, i pulled up to the tee when they were all of 10 or 15 paces away from it. and on every hole since number ten, they had, at some point or other, turned around, looked at me, and continued walking. same thing here - 10 paces away, turn around, look at me, continue walking. by this point i was spending a good ten minutes on every shot just waiting. it was starting to get dark fast, and i was bound and determined to finish my round. so i think, okay. if they don't let me through on 14, i'm GOING through.

sure enough, 14 is the same story as 13 - they're 10 paces away from the tee as i pull up. they look at me, keep walking. now as i said, i was playing one of my best rounds in memory, despite the ridiculous waiting. these guys were following the cart path up the left side, and evidently one of them had hooked off into the trees maybe 100 yards out. i strode onto the box, simultaneously pissed off and totally confident, and smashed a drive straight up the fairway about 280 yards. drove past, gave them a glare, got my par really quick before they could fire at me, and moved on to 15.

i totally realize i should have just gone to 15 in the first place and came back to 14, but i wanted these jerkoffs to know who they were holding up - a guy who was a LOT better than they were. i wanted them to know i could walk up and just crush a ball right up the middle and play right through them. i'd been watching them hit their shots left and right and i'd had enough. the fact that they'd turn around and look at me on EVERY HOLE was infuriating. like, "yeah, i see you. you can wait, buddy. you're not going through us." in hindsight, i'd say that now i feel more guilty than proud about how i handled that, and i'd probably do it differently if i could do it again.

anyway, end of the day, i wound up 5 over par for the round, which tied for my second best round ever.

[DavidFehertysBike]

What i find the most funny with ranting about douchebags on the golf course is that the stories always revolve around guys in carts... If more people walked, then im certain all douchebaggery could be averted.

[Fat Slice]

What i find the most funny with ranting about douchebags on the golf course is that the stories always revolve around guys in carts...

I think you have stumbled onto something.

[mirv]

another fun story - more in keeping with the "people picking up my golf ball," the number 2 par 3 at my regular course, the green is pretty close to the 8th tee box. i saw a couple of guys on the 8th box, waited for them to hit, and then i teed up and hit my shot. i land right on the green, stopping maybe 10 feet from the pin. i'm walking over to my bag, putting the club away, and here comes one of the guys from the 8th box onto number 2's green. he runs up to my ball, and without hesitation, picks it up! i yell, "hey, whoa, WHOA! that's MY BALL!!!"

"huh?"

"MY BALL!" *point at self, then point at him*

"oh." and he casually tosses it over his shoulder, where it rolls off the edge of the green several feet. no effort at all to put it back even remotely close to where it had landed. i met them as i was walking towards the green, and the guy said "sorry, i hit a drive about 500 yards straight up in the air, i thought that might've been it!"

yeah. you hit your drives a full minute before my ball ever landed on the green. that ball had some serious hangtime, didn't it? not only that, it actually traveled *backwards* since the green is slightly behind number 8's tee. idiots.

[pusher]

I have a feeling this stems form the mantra "bringing more people into the game". But I ask you: what kind of people? None of us wants these type of people playing anywhere near us. Is no one teaching the game? Not just how to swing, but the game itself- the everyday kind of stuff, like we're talking about here? Things like courtesy, etiquette and simple common sense- like not picking up a ball that isn't theirs, letting a single play through, keeping up with the group infront, not driving your cart onto the green (I can't believe that one!), fixing your ball mark, raking the bunker, not stepping in your playing partner's line, or casting your shadow between him and the hole, not moving around or digging into your bag or talking while others are hitting, etc. This is probably more of a problem at public courses where anyone can get on. I don't know what the answer is, but I know how you guys feel. Someone needs to teach the newbies these things without sounding preachy. How do we do it?