Your favorite -- or least favorite -- golf clichés

[iacas]

I still like "90% of all putts left short don't go in," but the trick is to use it sparingly.

[MGP]

I still like "90% of all putts left short don't go in," but the trick is to use it sparingly.

I have a friend who always says "whoa, scared the hole with that one" when he misses a putt. That always annoys me.

One of these times I'm going to say "No, I'm pretty sure I saw the hole flip off your ball as it slid bye".

[FIJIGolf23]

I always like to use, "Whoa, dude I heard your thong snap all the way over here" whenever someone I'm playing with leaves a putt short.

I HATE when I hit a bad shot to hear someone say "Uh-oh."

[erniebanks]

#1
Every shot hit on TV has some A** screaming "Get in the hole". Even on tee shot on a 600 yard par5.
Please, please, someone deck some of them so they will STFU.
#2
Going to the tee after an eagle 3 on a par 5 "Anyone have a 2 ?"
#3
After short putt "Does your sister(husband) play?"
or even " you shouda hit with your purse"
#4
"good, good? ( and he's 20 feet away and you're 18 inches)
#5
over 99% of all short putts don't go in.

I'm sure there more that grate at me but space is limited.

[oneil003]

One time a while ago I pulled a ball left, and went up onto a street. The course was backed up, so the group behind us was at the same tee box, and he cupped his ear, listening for something. He then said, "Where's the sound of the ball hitting the winshield, because that was a horrible shot." All of his friends started laughing, but I wanted to go over and start beating him with a wedge.

[oneil003]

Oh sorry, one other thing... When somebody says "kick left/right" when it is obvious it isn't going to kick they way they want

[FIJIGolf23]

One time a while ago I pulled a ball left, and went up onto a street. The course was backed up, so the group behind us was at the same tee box, and he cupped his ear, listening for something. He then said, "Where's the sound of the ball hitting the winshield, because that was a horrible shot." All of his friends started laughing, but I wanted to go over and start beating him with a wedge.

Wow, that is extremely disrespectful if you do not know the guy, which it seems you didn't since he was in the group behind you. I would have told him where he could stick his buddies shaft for a comment like that.

[Shindig]

I have mixed feelings about "hit it Alice." This is known as Nancy or Sally elsewhere, apparently. I once told people I was going to change my name to Alice so I could say it to myself after missing a putt way too short. Seeing as how Alice is also a boy's name, I'm fine with it. But my rule for myself is to never say anything to myself during the round that a good caddy wouldn't say to me.

I love when I have trouble reading a green and I ask a playing partner to call the psychic friends hotline for me.

Chili Dips are a "Hormel Shot"

Finally, I still chuckle at Gary McCord's Bikini-Wax comment, but when the greens are getting fast, I'd suggest calling in the zamboni.

[BritBoy]

I got put with a couple of older gents last night that were hilarious. Its not so much a cliché but had me rolling. 1 of the guys was at the 150 marker, pulled a club, turned to his buddy and said "Do you think I can get there with an 8 iron?", the other guy replied, "Absolutely........ how many times are you going to hit it?"

[niblick]

I got put with a couple of older gents last night that were hilarious. Its not so much a cliché but had me rolling. 1 of the guys was at the 150 marker, pulled a club, turned to his buddy and said "Do you think I can get there with an 8 iron?", the other guy replied, "Absolutely........ how many times are you going to hit it?"

That's a St. Andrew's caddy classic. "Can I get there with a 5 iron?" "Eventually."

[Q.Q.Quillume]

I have mixed feelings about "hit it Alice." This is known as Nancy or Sally elsewhere, apparently.

Clipped & pasted from:

http://www.cybergolf.com/writerscorn...sp?newsID=4728 3. After saying the tired clich�: "Hit it, Alice!" after leaving yet another putt short of the cup, the offending golfer shall have to write a 1,000-word essay on the fact that the actual phrase is: "Hit it, Aliss!" and refers to Peter Aliss leaving a putt short in a crucial Ryder Cup match.

[Striper]

Least favorite is when I hit a poor shot and my partner mutters "ouch" under his breath while he winces.

Favorite was when my buddy topped his drive, as it trickled out to the fairway he yelled "get in the HOLE". Great use of the most annoying line in pro golf.

I agree, you have to be able to laugh at yourself if you are going to enjoy this game.

[Q.Q.Quillume]

Favorite was when my buddy topped his drive, as it trickled out to the fairway he yelled "get in the HOLE". Great use of the most annoying line in pro golf.

Maybe there should be a poll as to whether "get in the hole" or "you da man" is more annoying. Or if something else can challenge these two.

[MGP]

Maybe there should be a poll as to whether "get in the hole" or "you da man" is more annoying. Or if something else can challenge these two.

I actually think "Get in the hole" has it's appropriate moment on the course, say when a guy hits an approach shot or tee shot on a par 3 on the green and the ball is tracking dead on the line to the hole at about the right speed. Off the tee on a par 5 or long par 4 ain't it though.

"You da man" is pretty universally retarded sounding whenever it's yelled by a drunken moron in the gallery, IMO.

[ettsn]

Maybe I'm just a nice guy, but I like all those good advice tip kinda things, like:

A 300y drive and a 2in putt look the same on a scorecard.
It's better to be 200y in the fairway than 300y in the woods.
Until someone shoots a round at 18 strokes, we all have something to work on.
(although bordering on trite, I still like it) Drive for show, putt for dough.
That's why (RT Jones, Nicklaus, Faso, etc) gave us (3/4/5) strokes to play this one.
The best golfers have a long drive and a short memory.

And I hate the obvious gallery idiots with "you da man" and "get in the hole".

[laconic517]

most annoying has got to be "one" when the ball falls off the tee.

I hate how people snicker like they were so clever and the first person to say it.

A fun one is in the group I play skins with, when someone comes up short we say "Get some stick" On everything, then of course on the drives it was always hit off oft he heel.

[jmurdock]

I hate when your putting and the ball is 4 feet from going in and your partner says, "Nice birdie". The ball always seems to take a turn at the last moment and miss. Just wait till it goes in and then say, "Nice birdie".

Favorite- After a birdie hole, the player hits a horrible tee shot on the next hole or bogies the hole and they say, "Nice P.B.F.U." (Post Biridie F@#k Up)

[jowlar]

I still like "90% of all putts left short don't go in," but the trick is to use it sparingly.

I hear this one alot with one variation. Here in alabama it is "they did a study at Auburn that said 90% of all putts left short don't go in".

I don't hit the ball very long so I rely on hitting fairways and greens to score, so I always hear from my bomb and gouge buddies that I play condom golf, "it doesnt feel quite as good, but it won't get you in any trouble".