Your favorite -- or least favorite -- golf clichés

[bsettle]

I routinely get paired up with people that think they can the ball further than they really can because they hit it long ONCE in there life and I get this STUPID cliche when they ball is clearly twenty or thirty yards short:

"Get UP!" Like it is hitting the front of the green and they JUST need it to release and not bounce off THREE straight cart paths to get there!

HOW ABOUT HITTING ONE MORE CLUB after missing 17 straight greens short!

[mtsalmela80]

When someone skulls a chip and the ball rockets past the green bouncing a couple times and someone is yelling "sit..sit!!"

[rwfastrax]

it SO gets on my nerves when I hear "uh oh" when I hit a shot that could potentially be in trouble. I knew the shot was in trouble before you did.

[Golden]

When I know my putt is gonna be way too long, I sometime say... Hit a tree.

[HytrewQasdfg]

Least favorite: Get in the hole.

Favorite: Sir, you are being ejected for yelling "get in the hole".

[sean_miller]

Short putts - "Skate!!", "Get legs", "Your slip is showing"

Long putts - "hit a house"

[PrairieParson]

"Never up, never in" Really. I didn't know that. No one should say that to someone holding a weapon who just missed a putt that would have gone in save half a turn of the ball.

[jdub]

the phrase topped it, chunked it... I hate people saying FORE.. if not need

I hate people saying watch this... they usualy on display FAIL

I hate people talking while I hit, or using me as an example of what not to do

I hate people thinking only doctors golf... although I saw one playing the back 9 in scrubs...wtf

[PEZGolf]

Best one---to say on the first tee when a short hitter like me is playing in a foursome with a Big Boomer: "I like this course. The woods are full of the balls of the long hitters."

[Smiffy]

I used to play with a guy who came out with some brilliant lines.

Like you hit a horror shot off the tee. You come down about an inch or two behind the ball and fat it up in the air about 30 feet. He'd say "well you did have a bloody awful lie"

Or you do an air shot and he'd say "you can see why this is stroke index one"

One day he did an air shot on the first and turned round and said "my home course is higher than this"

[Lefty-Golfer]

A few years ago I was on a par 5. Had a side hill lie, in the rough, over water some 200 yards of carry...or I could throw a 7 iron out to the right and hit another short iron to the green. I stand of the shot considering the options, I grab a 7 from my bag and as I pull it out my buddy says "the Lord hates a coward"...so I pull out the 5 wood and dunk it into the water. That was 5 or 6 years ago and at least once a round he his quoted on that...

[FHopper]

"the number one thing to remember" head down, grip, address, swing speed, etc.
It seems like every time someone gives me advise it starts with that phrase.

[O.B. Right]

I don't like people who talk to thier ball after they hit it. "Bite!" "Sit!" "Be good" . .etc, etc. It's one thing to do it every once in a while when a shot is particulary close but it quickly gets annoying - especially when the shot has no chance.

Recently I got paired up with a guy who talked to his ball after every shot. Sometimes reprimanding it . sometimes pleading with it, etc, etc. Another guy in the group chimed in with what is now one of my favorites - "It's tough to find the one ball in the dozen with ears"

I often find myself making comments like "hit that one fat" or "got all of that one". Or, recently, after holing out with an X for the hole (too many strokes - pick up) I say something like "It might take me 6 or 7 to get up but I always get in in 5" . .and then wink.

[DJYoshi]

how bout when you get a bad bounce off of a green..or a bad roll and someone says: "That's golf"
just like someone saying: "that's poker"

[Trav]

I started to do a quick list, then as it grew I realized that most cliches bug me, because they are - cliches . Two that really annoy me are referring to clubs as "weapons" and "hitting the big ball before the little one."

[just hit it]

Question I ask after I hit a particularly bad drive- You know what I like about that drive? answer- Gonna make my par look great! Then I usually bogey the hole.

[just hit it]

Also- I use "Alice" all the time, and after someone duffs a drive 50' in front of them, yell "I got it"

[shankapotamus]

It always makes me laugh when I play with Grant at my home course. Once when hitting his pitch on a short par 4 he flew the second tier and went off the back of the green. He was like "Go! Go...go,go. Nice now stay there" Or if he comes up short he says "Whoa! easy!" One time he hit a wedge shot over the green it skipped and started going up a hill behind the green he said "Go! Get up that hill!"

What about an iron that lands pin high then back spins off the green into a bunker?