TST SoCal Spring 2014 Outing - May 4, 2014 @ Black Gold Golf Club (Yorba Linda, CA)

[iacas]

Sorry that I was not aware that it was a topic of conversation, and did not realize that it was supposed to have been a "guy's get-together".

I think there were posts about it in the last thread. I could easily be mis-remembering. I know it was discussed.

And like I said, if the four of you are content to always be a foursome and never play with anyone else, that's okay.

We can also create a "kids allowed TST outing" too? This might possibly encourage others with kids to join in on some more TST outings?

If you'd like to, sure. I don't know how many participants you'd get, but it's a great idea if someone wants to spearhead it.

Also, what if the kid's join the forum? Would they qualify as "one of the guys"?

No… not really.

[hacker101]

I'll broach a somewhat serious topic a bit here, and I fully realize I'm not in Southern California, but I know some others might not bring this up to be polite, so I'm fine mentioning it and you can get mad at me if you want.

Wasn't the last one the final one at which y'all were bringing your kids? It's a "guy's gathering" and when someone brings a kid, it quickly loses the feel of a "guy's get-together."

Now, if the two of you (@Lihu and @hacker101) wouldn't even come without your kids, and you're content to always play as the "hacker+Lihu and kids foursome," then nothing has to change.

So there I said it, and sorry, but I know it's been a topic of conversation. Not a big one, but it's there, and I'm a fan of airing things and reaching an understanding. I hate it when things aren't said.

You or any one can say what ever to me polite or not I am a big boy.

I don't recall this conversation other then parents need to play with there kids, could be wrong?

What I recall was that we were no longer inviting a guest that was not part of the TST, this came up because of my father in law. Now if that is true then anyone inviting a person that person should be a part of the TST correct?

So yes I decide if I will join the outing if my son is not invited, I just need to know one way or the other.

Or if it comes down to myself, Lihu and the boys again and everyone is okay with this then cool I am also.

So my question is to all are you guy okay with it?

[jefkve]

Having played with Lihu and Kaili, I'm fine with you guys bringing your kids. I understand where Erik is coming from, but personally, I don't care as long as no one cares about me dropping the occasional F bomb, etc. (and to be honest, with Lihu and his son off in their own cart, I'm pretty sure they missed all my swearing....)

There were a couple of discussions with last month's outing: the children issue, guests, and asking for particular partners. I remember the kids one, and the 'asking for particular partners' one...guests I don't recall...

[Golfingdad]

The general idea is that we are all out there just to have fun and meet new people.  Or get to know better some people we "kinda" know. ;)  Last time we had a small discussion about mixing up the groups, which is why the idea of bringing the kids sort of muddles things ... you guys won't be able to play with anybody else as long as you keep bringing the kids.  Its fine by me if you want to do that, but it just means that you guys miss out on playing with new people.  The same goes for those who really want to play with the same people each time.  My group was guilty of that last outing.  (Beach is a house-husband at this point, practically, and doesn't ever get to play golf anymore ;))

Bottom line is that there are no rules to this thing.  It's laid back and fun.  Bring the kids, and you guys play as a group.  We will just have to get to know you on the range beforehand or in the grill afterwards.

[Lihu]

Having played with Lihu and Kaili, I'm fine with you guys bringing your kids. I understand where Erik is coming from, but personally, I don't care as long as no one cares about me dropping the occasional F bomb, etc. (and to be honest, with Lihu and his son off in their own cart, I'm pretty sure they missed all my swearing....)

There were a couple of discussions with last month's outing: the children issue, guests, and asking for particular partners. I remember the kids one, and the 'asking for particular partners' one...guests I don't recall...

Thanks for the vote of confidence, we really enjoyed playing with you and Roman that time. Kaili understands that we adults have our moments.

Mix and matching of partners is no problem either. I think it's a great way for the kids to grow a bit and understand the game better from the adults' perspectives. There are some times when his golf team "loops" for the adults, but this is more of a fun thing where he can play as well.

As for the tees that we use, I think both Kaili and I are ready for the "tips". We had a blast playing many of them yesterday.

We should really plan to go at the same time again, so we can spend some time on the range together. This would be a great "forum" for the exchange of comments and ideas. It was pretty good last time at Goose Creek.

[iacas]

Bottom line is that there are no rules to this thing.  It's laid back and fun.  Bring the kids, and you guys play as a group.  We will just have to get to know you on the range beforehand or in the grill afterwards.

That's the main point. Y'all can do what you want, but basically, if you want to bring the kids, it's fairest to either always bring the kids and to have that be your set foursome, or if one can't make it, perhaps to leave the kid at home so you can join a full "adult" foursome.

Mix and matching of partners is no problem either. I think it's a great way for the kids to grow a bit and understand the game better from the adults' perspectives. There are some times when his golf team "loops" for the adults, but this is more of a fun thing where he can play as well.

Let me ask you this… If I invited you over for a guy's night playing poker and pool, would you bring Kaili? Would you even ask?

I have a kid. There are clearly times when she's invited, and other times when she's not. Even at the Super Bowl party we attend, the kids are sequestered in a separate room so the adults can be adults (and the kids can be kids!).

A guy invited us to his house after a soccer game a few months ago. We brought some wine, had some wings, etc. and played some ping pong and shot the breeze. And the whole time, it was awkward because his 7th-grade daughter and 15-year-old son were there. Adults couldn't behave like adults. It was awkward and unfair. The "party" ended up lasting only about 90 minutes, and everyone had left by 10pm (on a Friday night). Everyone was polite… but it was awkward, and people talked about it afterwards.

Even now, when my kiddo comes to the game, if some team members go get some wings and some beer afterwards, we just head home. It's not fair to the others to feel put upon to provide a "growing opportunity" for my kid.

Again, if you want to bring your kid, I think you and @hacker101 can basically always play together as a foursome. That doesn't seem like it has much of a point to me, but if you enjoy it, cool. And by all means, spearhead a "dads and kids" event. Could be great!

P.S. This was talked about last time. I didn't think I was mis-remembering that…

[Golfingdad]

And by all means, spearhead a "dads and kids" event. Could be great!

Just wait about 7 or 8 years so I can come to.

Oh wait, your kids won't be kids anymore then, will they?

OK, nevermind.

[hacker101]

I understand the sprit of the outing so put us as tentative until this is settled. I get what iacas is saying. Also since Lihu may not make it will have to wait and be sure he can go so we have a set 4 some any how. Again not a big deal.

[bplewis24]

I have a kid. There are clearly times when she's invited, and other times when she's not.

This might be the best option.  Maybe have one of these outings where it truly is just the grown ups.  The other 2-3 times each season, anything goes (including guests, etc).

I really don't care either way, but I see the appeal of an "adult" outing.  As long as I don't have to treat anybody with kiddie gloves, I'm fine :-)

[tristanhilton85]

The general idea is that we are all out there just to have fun and meet new people.  Or get to know better some people we "kinda" know. ;)  Last time we had a small discussion about mixing up the groups, which is why the idea of bringing the kids sort of muddles things ... you guys won't be able to play with anybody else as long as you keep bringing the kids.  Its fine by me if you want to do that, but it just means that you guys miss out on playing with new people.  The same goes for those who really want to play with the same people each time.  My group was guilty of that last outing.  (Beach is a house-husband at this point, practically, and doesn't ever get to play golf anymore ;))

Bottom line is that there are no rules to this thing.  It's laid back and fun.  Bring the kids, and you guys play as a group.  We will just have to get to know you on the range beforehand or in the grill afterwards.

Exactly this.

And on the note of guests, I really don't care if they come or not. I've brought them to all but one of the outings, although at this point he's become a member of the forum ( @Bechambo ) and is likely to play in a group other than mine. I obviously want the site to grow so if you bring a guest and that gets them to join the site and become a member of our community, then by all means go for it. But if you bring along two or three buddies with you and have your own little group, it kind of defeats the point of the outing again. Think about it, if you bring two friends your group is going to be your little threesome and some guy who is going to feel just a bit awkward because he doesn't really know any of you guys while you all know each other. It's a bit better when everybody spends the entire 18 getting to know each other and doesn't feel like an outsider.

So, all that said, here's an updated list. If you haven't chimed in since I last posted the list to either confirm that you'll be there or to bail out, please do so. Especially if you've only posted once or something a month ago to say you'll come; I just want to make sure that everybody will be there who says that they will. Players with a * have said recently that they will be there, if you don't have a * next to your username, let me know either way as soon as you can.

*1. @tristanhilton85

*2. @mvmac

*3. @Golfingdad

*4. @Bechambo

5. @Beachcomber

*6. @jefkve

7. @bmartin461

8. @Big C

*9. @Shindig

*10. @swampertwo

11. @rpan

12. @Pakoh

Also, I haven't heard anything from @GolfSwine , so if Sean or Drew could try to find out for me if he doesn't check in here, that'd be great.

@hacker101 , are you coming? I wasn't sure after your last post. It's good with me either way, I just want to know so I get a good head count.

[Lihu]

Exactly this. And on the note of guests, I really don't care if they come or not. I've brought them to all but one of the outings, although at this point he's become a member of the forum ( @Bechambo ) and is likely to play in a group other than mine. I obviously want the site to grow so if you bring a guest and that gets them to join the site and become a member of our community, then by all means go for it. But if you bring along two or three buddies with you and have your own little group, it kind of defeats the point of the outing again. Think about it, if you bring two friends your group is going to be your little threesome and some guy who is going to feel just a bit awkward because he doesn't really know any of you guys while you all know each other. It's a bit better when everybody spends the entire 18 getting to know each other and doesn't feel like an outsider. So, all that said, here's an updated list. If you haven't chimed in since I last posted the list to either confirm that you'll be there or to bail out, please do so. Especially if you've only posted once or something a month ago to say you'll come; I just want to make sure that everybody will be there who says that they will. Players with a * have said recently that they will be there, if you don't have a * next to your username, let me know either way as soon as you can. *1. @tristanhilton85 *2. @mvmac *3. @Golfingdad *4. @Bechambo 5. @Beachcomber *6. @jefkve 7. @bmartin461 8. @Big C *9. @Shindig *10. @swampertwo 11. @rpan 12. @Pakoh Also, I haven't heard anything from @GolfSwine , so if Sean or Drew could try to find out for me if he doesn't check in here, that'd be great. @hacker101 , are you coming? I wasn't sure after your last post. It's good with me either way, I just want to know so I get a good head count.

I'll know by next Monday if I can make it. Put me down for two, 75% probable.

[Pakoh]

Tristan- i can play most likely.  will just be getting back from a trip so if anything changes i will let you know.

Hacker and Lihu-  bring your kids if you want!  i dont care... Kali is a good golfer!

[hacker101]

Exactly this.

And on the note of guests, I really don't care if they come or not. I've brought them to all but one of the outings, although at this point he's become a member of the forum (@Bechambo) and is likely to play in a group other than mine. I obviously want the site to grow so if you bring a guest and that gets them to join the site and become a member of our community, then by all means go for it. But if you bring along two or three buddies with you and have your own little group, it kind of defeats the point of the outing again. Think about it, if you bring two friends your group is going to be your little threesome and some guy who is going to feel just a bit awkward because he doesn't really know any of you guys while you all know each other. It's a bit better when everybody spends the entire 18 getting to know each other and doesn't feel like an outsider.

So, all that said, here's an updated list. If you haven't chimed in since I last posted the list to either confirm that you'll be there or to bail out, please do so. Especially if you've only posted once or something a month ago to say you'll come; I just want to make sure that everybody will be there who says that they will. Players with a * have said recently that they will be there, if you don't have a * next to your username, let me know either way as soon as you can.

*1. @tristanhilton85

*2. @mvmac

*3. @Golfingdad

*4. @Bechambo

5. @Beachcomber

*6. @jefkve

7. @bmartin461

8. @Big C

*9. @Shindig

*10. @swampertwo

11. @rpan

12. @Pakoh

Also, I haven't heard anything from @GolfSwine, so if Sean or Drew could try to find out for me if he doesn't check in here, that'd be great.

@hacker101, are you coming? I wasn't sure after your last post. It's good with me either way, I just want to know so I get a good head count.

T,

I guess since Lihu is our partner due to the kids we will be there is he is able to make it. Or if he can not I am more then happy to just play with my son so we can see you guys again and keep in touch with you all.

Just let me know how you want to handle it.

[Lihu]

Tristan- i can play most likely.  will just be getting back from a trip so if anything changes i will let you know.

Hacker and Lihu-  bring your kids if you want!  i dont care... Kali is a good golfer!

Thanks, I'll tell him you said Hi.

[swampertwo]

I don't have any problems playing with kids--and we need them to help grow the game!  I might have a +1 from outside TST, and wouldn't necessarily expect to play with him--we get a lot of playing time together here at Mission Lakes.

T  I'll let you know pretty shortly if he can make it.

Jeff

[iacas]

I don't mind playing with kids either - I play with my kiddo every chance I get - but if I'm driving an hour and meeting up with guys from the site, I'd much rather play with a group of guys. Others feel the same way.

So, because this stuff is organized by Mike, or Tristan, or others as a volunteer type thing, and because they have better things to do than to check with people (who then feel slightly to moderately put upon) if they don't mind playing with kids, the rule is going to be simple:

Kids (under 18) are only allowed at TST events if they play with their parents in complete parent-child foursomes (i.e. Lihu+child/hacker+child or parent+brother+child+child or parent+3 children or whatever).

[hacker101]

Exactly this.

And on the note of guests, I really don't care if they come or not. I've brought them to all but one of the outings, although at this point he's become a member of the forum (@Bechambo) and is likely to play in a group other than mine. I obviously want the site to grow so if you bring a guest and that gets them to join the site and become a member of our community, then by all means go for it. But if you bring along two or three buddies with you and have your own little group, it kind of defeats the point of the outing again. Think about it, if you bring two friends your group is going to be your little threesome and some guy who is going to feel just a bit awkward because he doesn't really know any of you guys while you all know each other. It's a bit better when everybody spends the entire 18 getting to know each other and doesn't feel like an outsider.

So, all that said, here's an updated list. If you haven't chimed in since I last posted the list to either confirm that you'll be there or to bail out, please do so. Especially if you've only posted once or something a month ago to say you'll come; I just want to make sure that everybody will be there who says that they will. Players with a * have said recently that they will be there, if you don't have a * next to your username, let me know either way as soon as you can.

*1. @tristanhilton85

*2. @mvmac

*3. @Golfingdad

*4. @Bechambo

5. @Beachcomber

*6. @jefkve

7. @bmartin461

8. @Big C

*9. @Shindig

*10. @swampertwo

11. @rpan

12. @Pakoh

Also, I haven't heard anything from @GolfSwine, so if Sean or Drew could try to find out for me if he doesn't check in here, that'd be great.

@hacker101, are you coming? I wasn't sure after your last post. It's good with me either way, I just want to know so I get a good head count.

Hey Tristan,

I wanted to let you know that we will not be making this outing.

Thank you and mvmac as always for your hard work.

Hope you and the rest of the TST group have a great day of golf.

Hope to see you all soon, Mike

[rpan]

Do we know the estimated cost and format? I could potentially have a guest, but he wanted to make sure he wasn't getting fleeced.