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Worrying Pandemic :F*ckarounditis

post #1 of 8
Thread Starter 

F*ckarounditis is a behavioural disorder characterized by a mediocre golf game and complete lack of progress, despite significant amounts of time spent at the range and on the course.

F*ckarounditis most commonly manifests itself as an intense preoccupation with swingsetters, YouTube videos, tartan strides, plane finders, The Golf Channel, TPI programs, foam noodles and Johnny Miller. Fear of short game practice and tracking stats is another distinguishing trait. Physical ability is either completely lacking or misapplied (towards questionable or unproductive training practices). 

Despite an alarming increase of f*ckarounditis in recent years, prevelance may vary greatly depending on location. However, in most private and municipal courses, it has been estimated that 90-100% of individuals are afflicted to varying degrees. 

Environment and social networks are crucial factors for triggering the disease. It has been proposed that the roots of the disease stems from misinformation and counter-productive training advice found in popular media ("golf magazines") and information hubs on the Internet.  

Human nature and the so-called "laziness", "magic bullet" and "complacency" genes plays a permissive role for allowing the disease to take hold.

The disease spreads rapidly, as carriers of the disease communicate with other individuals in locker rooms, social media outlets and other arenas of interaction and information exchange in real life or otherwise.   

The onset of symptoms typically occurs in young adulthood and may go undiagnosed for a lifetime. Diagnosis is set by a professional and based on observed behaviours and swing progress.  

Symptoms, preventative measures and intervention strategies are reviewed and discussed. 


The statistics all point towards the same conclusion: we have a global outbreak of f*ckarounditis.

 

Be on your guard gentlemen. Be careful who you listen to, work diligently on the specific information given to you that affects your golf game and your golf swing. Tune everything else out. Work on what needs working on until it is fixed. This is usually a long time. Be diligent.Stop hopping around chasing hope. Your golf game will thank you.

 

 

LLT

post #2 of 8
Thanks.. I'll be on the look out as this sounds serious.. Now that you mention it I think I might have had that for a while.. Although I wonder info still do... Where can I get checked out again, I'd hate to leave this untreated as it might stick for ever!
post #3 of 8

"F*ckarounditis" is why I take two 500, mg aspirins every morning. It is also why I drink beer in massive quantities sometimes. I get a check up every six months as a preventive measure, at the local "Hooters" . Those folks know what to look for..............Wait, maybe that should be the other way around? What ever, I know I don't have it..........yet.

 

 

EDIT !!!  Can one catch it just by reading this thread? 

post #4 of 8
Outstanding post! I am going to form f*ckarounditis anonymous for which I am not only a member but I am the president.
post #5 of 8

But will insurance pay for its treatment?

 

:-)

 

If so, that would give you and your therapist a free excuse to spend your hour talking about f@ckarounditis.

post #6 of 8

Is it contagious? If so I'm getting the hell out of here.

post #7 of 8
I stopped reading the advice in golf magazine's as soon as I realized how terrible some of it was. It started when I saw a magazine that said your swing was your swing because it was "the optimal way for your body to swing a club". Besides getting a good laugh out of it, I started making a point of skipping anything that's supposed to be instructive that doesn't specifically pertain to me or that I didn't already want to know before I saw it.

That said, I likely suffer relapses of this condition whenever I'm tired at the practice area. It makes me slack off and lose focus.
post #8 of 8
Thread Starter 

Be very wary of a related illness called Special Flower Syndrome. It's extremely prevalent nowadays too and often goes hand in hand with F*ckarounditis.

 

Special Flower Syndrome is where the subject feels for whatever reason that he is different from every other golfer on the planet with two arms, and two legs. He constantly asks for advice regarding his god awful pass at the ball, and when you offer him sound, experienced, logical advice his initial retort is always something like this:

 

"That all sounds good, but I can't do that as I have *insert bullshit problem with specific body part related to swing issue* and I tried it before for 2 seconds but I can't do it, my chiro/therapist/hairdresser/dogwalker says I can't because of my issues, and I think it may be related to that and I am sensitive to gluten/pollen/peanuts/honest golf advice and that's why I can't do it too"

 

Society is full of these Special Flowers, all they really seem to have a problem with or be allergic to is reality and hard work....

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