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Meh, rough breaks happen. I've never played in a tourney, so I can't say I can relate to how you felt, but you know what's best.

I'm sure you'll be back out there in good form soon enough.

Ryan M
 
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  Golfingdad said:
Originally Posted by Golfingdad

First of all ... thanks for sharing Cipher, I know it wasn't easy.

All I can say is to reiterate what Ernest and Jamo said, which is that I wouldn't be so quick to decide that you aren't ready or interested in tournament golf.  It was your first try.  It definitely takes practice and time to get used to.  I am also a relative beginner to tournament golf and have pretty much sucked royally each time out.  But each time I get a little better handle on the nerves, feel a little more comfortable (not to mention I'm improving through Evolvr as well) so I'm confident that one of these days I'll start to figure it out.

Just keep at it.  If you find that you enjoy casual golf and not tournaments, thats great, but just don't make that decision yet. :)

Oh and one last thing ...

One way I try (repeat: try) to help aleviate the pressure is to remind myself that it's just golf ... and amateur golf at that, where I'm not in it for the money or glory ... therefore I don't NEED to make anything.  It doesn't always work, but I'd like to think it helps some. :)

I think that is the key thing for me to understand here is not to give up on tournament golf yet.  Maybe I will play in my club championship or something this fall just to get some more tournament experience in.  I like your idea of there really are no must make putts.  Hard not to  panic though when you four putt for the first time that you can remember it was from 15' or so.

Originally Posted by Slice of Life

Meh, rough breaks happen. I've never played in a tourney, so I can't say I can relate to how you felt, but you know what's best.

I'm sure you'll be back out there in good form soon enough.

Yep crap happens, all we can do is move on.

Nate

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This is the last I'll say about this, and take whatever I say (since it's just text) and take about 50% of any tone or judgment out, because I can only use words that I know and they tend to come off far more strongly than if you were to hear me say those words.

  cipher said:
Originally Posted by cipher

I was out of place, I was a distraction and felt that the best thing to do was to remove myself from that group.  It was not fair to them IMO to watch me continue to melt down.

That's the only thing I wanted to comment on further: that sounds more like rationalizing than anything else. You hit the ball reasonably well off the tees and four putted a little. That doesn't put you out of place, and it doesn't make you a distraction.

Again, I've played with guys who are hacking it around. Good golfers don't pay any attention to you, except to stay out of your way and to make sure you're staying out of theirs. They probably didn't even know what you were shooting, except that it wasn't good, and that you were losing to them.

Maybe you were a distraction, but at this point you have nine holes of experience, so I don't think you were quite the distraction you used to rationalize quitting (see, that's an example: only give that sentence about 25% of the weight it seems to have just reading it).

I too wouldn't be so quick to give up on tournament golf.

Erik J. Barzeski —  I knock a ball. It goes in a gopher hole. 🏌🏼‍♂️
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  iacas said:
Originally Posted by iacas

This is the last I'll say about this, and take whatever I say (since it's just text) and take about 50% of any tone or judgment out, because I can only use words that I know and they tend to come off far more strongly than if you were to hear me say those words.

That's the only thing I wanted to comment on further: that sounds more like rationalizing than anything else. You hit the ball reasonably well off the tees and four putted a little. That doesn't put you out of place, and it doesn't make you a distraction.

Again, I've played with guys who are hacking it around. Good golfers don't pay any attention to you, except to stay out of your way and to make sure you're staying out of theirs. They probably didn't even know what you were shooting, except that it wasn't good, and that you were losing to them.

Maybe you were a distraction, but at this point you have nine holes of experience, so I don't think you were quite the distraction you used to rationalize quitting (see, that's an example: only give that sentence about 25% of the weight it seems to have just reading it).

I too wouldn't be so quick to give up on tournament golf.

No worries, I understand and have a similar issue with sounding more harsh than I am trying to or am aware of at times.  As an actual client of yours and with my background I can appreciate what you are saying and your honest opinion.  A lot of people in that position would not say anything.  That being said you are probably right about everything above.  I won't comment or try to rationalize it any further because it is what it is and I did what I did.  I have to live with it, live with posting the embarrassment here, and the disappointment of my play and decision.  I hope I learned my lesson from it and become better for it.  I will just move forward and continue working on what I need to and improve.

Nate

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  cipher said:
Originally Posted by cipher

No worries, I understand and have a similar issue with sounding more harsh than I am trying to or am aware of at times.  As an actual client of yours and with my background I can appreciate what you are saying and your honest opinion.  A lot of people in that position would not say anything.  That being said you are probably right about everything above.  I won't comment or try to rationalize it any further because it is what it is and I did what I did.  I have to live with it, live with posting the embarrassment here, and the disappointment of my play and decision.  I hope I learned my lesson from it and become better for it.  I will just move forward and continue working on what I need to and improve.

Okay. Take what you said at about 25% strength and that's probably the appropriate level of response. :) It was one time. I don't think anyone here has made any judgments of you about it.

At the end of the day it's just freakin' golf. :D

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Erik J. Barzeski —  I knock a ball. It goes in a gopher hole. 🏌🏼‍♂️
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Back to work on the swing.  The long irons as mentioned are troubling me.  Watching plus guys this week made me realize that that is one of the huge flaws in my game.  I am hitting them overly low with more draw than I want.  The video shows this but it is kind of hard to see with the overcast conditions on the range.  I am using a 5 iron here, ball towards the leading heel and still it is coming out very low drawing quite a bit and does not carry enough.  Needless to say I am not getting the distance I should right now on the long irons and am not sure where the shots will end up.  I have uploaded these to evolvr, because it has been a while time since I have uploaded anything.  I think a lot of this has to do with what I am working on from my last lesson.  And as that starts to click more things should get better.  It is pretty much the same with my driver and three wood though.  I have been setting up open and hitting a straight fade with those clubs lately.  However I am sometimes killed by a double cross with the 3w.  I am sure as we keep working on things with the lessons that I will improve here but, just showing what the result of the flaws are here.

Nate

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I think it is time to permanently add the leg bend in that Mike was talking about here: post #92 With the longer clubs I especially look way too stiff in the legs and upright.

Nate

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  iacas said:
Originally Posted by iacas

This is the last I'll say about this, and take whatever I say (since it's just text) and take about 50% of any tone or judgment out, because I can only use words that I know and they tend to come off far more strongly than if you were to hear me say those words.

That's the only thing I wanted to comment on further: that sounds more like rationalizing than anything else. You hit the ball reasonably well off the tees and four putted a little. That doesn't put you out of place, and it doesn't make you a distraction.

Again, I've played with guys who are hacking it around. Good golfers don't pay any attention to you, except to stay out of your way and to make sure you're staying out of theirs. They probably didn't even know what you were shooting, except that it wasn't good, and that you were losing to them.

Maybe you were a distraction, but at this point you have nine holes of experience, so I don't think you were quite the distraction you used to rationalize quitting (see, that's an example: only give that sentence about 25% of the weight it seems to have just reading it).

I too wouldn't be so quick to give up on tournament golf.

Sorry to hear about the way things went but 100% agree with what Erik said.  You may feel like you're a distraction but in reality you're not, you were in play every hole.  Few years back I was playing a Cal state amateur at Spyglass, qualified to make it into the tournament and my first tee shot doesn't make it past the ladies tees.  You have to hit your drive through a shoot, I pulled it, hit a tree branch 50 yards out and landed just behind the ladies tee.  It was a disaster of a hole and made 10.  Ended up shooting 46-34 for the best 80 of my life.  Point is you can always turn it around and learn something about yourself and competitive golf.  Also no one really pays that much attention to you because they are more concerned with themselves.

Not trying to make you feel more like crap because I think there are are some positives with regards to how you hit it, and I don't think you're bad under pressure, just think you need more experience with it.  Bobby Jones had a quote about tournament golf and how it was a different game than golf (something like that).

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  mvmac said:
Originally Posted by mvmac

Sorry to hear about the way things went but 100% agree with what Erik said.  You may feel like you're a distraction but in reality you're not, you were in play every hole.  Few years back I was playing a Cal state amateur at Spyglass, qualified to make it into the tournament and my first tee shot doesn't make it past the ladies tees.  You have to hit your drive through a shoot, I pulled it, hit a tree branch 50 yards out and landed just behind the ladies tee.  It was a disaster of a hole and made 10.  Ended up shooting 46-34 for the best 80 of my life.  Point is you can always turn it around and learn something about yourself and competitive golf.  Also no one really pays that much attention to you because they are more concerned with themselves.

Not trying to make you feel more like crap because I think there are are some positives with regards to how you hit it, and I don't think you're bad under pressure, just think you need more experience with it.  Bobby Jones had a quote about tournament golf and how it was a different game than golf (something like that).

Thanks for writing that Mike.  I appreciate your words.  I think I have beat myself up pretty bad over this so I will not keep going on and on about it too much.  A couple things that happened on the first two holes freaked me out and I could not recover mentally.  I am not really comfortable sharing all of it here publicly but it does not matter anyway.  I know there are no adequate excuses.  It would have been easy to come on here and say I injured myself or something and could not complete the round but that is not the truth.  I just lost trust in my ability to play well early in the round, could not really recover and made a bad decision for bad reasons thereafter.  I just want to learn from it, and become a better player/person for it.

Nate

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  mvmac said:
Few years back I was playing a Cal state amateur at Spyglass, qualified to make it into the tournament and my first tee shot doesn't make it past the ladies tees.  You have to hit your drive through a shoot, I pulled it, hit a tree branch 50 yards out and landed just behind the ladies tee.  It was a disaster of a hole and made 10.  Ended up shooting 46-34 for the best 80 of my life.  Point is you can always turn it around and learn something about yourself and competitive golf.  Also no one really pays that much attention to you because they are more concerned with themselves.

If we're sharing tales of woe: In high school, my senior year we were playing against a nearby town whose home course was TPC Boston. I was at the number one spot because I had been playing well lately, which means my group was the first to go off, so everyone was around the tee watching. The first hole is a relatively short par 4 (325-350ish off the top of my head). I take out my hybrid, and chunk the ball harder than I've ever chunked it. It went about 10 yards, smack dab into the middle of the forward tee box. My next turn, I chunk it even harder, just dribbling it into some deep rough. I barely manage to get it together to knock my third down the middle, hit a solid SW from 105 to 15 feet, and drain a nice bogey putt to tie the hole. I ended up winning the match. Morale of the story is, I seldom go an entire round without an single redeeming moment, and having those in the back of your mind are great to draw on. (Hold on, making sure I don't trip getting off this soapbox.)

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Cipher - I hope this helps you.

Of my 57 years, I have about 51 that includes some behavior I regret. And if I could remember it, I might include all 57 years.

We all have regrettable behavior. We're human beings, and naturally, we are flawed. Some of us will work on those flaws until the day we expire. Some of us will go through life oblivious to our flaws and repeat them. A key, I believe, is to not repeat our errors. Forgive yourself, don't beat yourself up. You're a great guy, just human. You are a fine golfer, and the reality is that we will have bad days. On those bad days, we grind. As my wise, six year old son tells me, "You can only do your best." And your best will vary from day to day.

I've found that most people are so concerned about themselves that they are rarely looking at others unless, as has been said wisely here, you interfere with their game.

You can immerse yourself in golf self-help books as I have. It works temporarily. But the best counsel I can offer is to know yourself, observe yourself dispassionately, golf in the present, the past shot means nothing other than learning from it, your past and future score mean nothing during a round - stay in the present. What others think about you should mean nothing to you - those are their issues unless you allow it to affect you.   Have a goal, but forget it as you go through the process (each shot), and tally up the results at the end of the day. If I had to put it in one word - awareness.

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  jamo said:
Originally Posted by jamo

If we're sharing tales of woe:

In high school, my senior year we were playing against a nearby town whose home course was TPC Boston. I was at the number one spot because I had been playing well lately, which means my group was the first to go off, so everyone was around the tee watching. The first hole is a relatively short par 4 (325-350ish off the top of my head). I take out my hybrid, and chunk the ball harder than I've ever chunked it. It went about 10 yards, smack dab into the middle of the forward tee box. My next turn, I chunk it even harder, just dribbling it into some deep rough.

I barely manage to get it together to knock my third down the middle, hit a solid SW from 105 to 15 feet, and drain a nice bogey putt to tie the hole. I ended up winning the match.

Morale of the story is, I seldom go an entire round without an single redeeming moment, and having those in the back of your mind are great to draw on.

(Hold on, making sure I don't trip getting off this soapbox.)

  Mr. Desmond said:
Originally Posted by Mr. Desmond

Cipher - I hope this helps you.

Of my 57 years, I have about 51 that includes some behavior I regret. And if I could remember it, I might include all 57 years.

We all have regrettable behavior. We're human beings, and naturally, we are flawed. Some of us will work on those flaws until the day we expire. Some of us will go through life oblivious to our flaws and repeat them. A key, I believe, is to not repeat our errors. Forgive yourself, don't beat yourself up. You're a great guy, just human. You are a fine golfer, and the reality is that we will have bad days. On those bad days, we grind. As my wise, six year old son tells me, "You can only do your best." And your best will vary from day to day.

I've found that most people are so concerned about themselves that they are rarely looking at others unless, as has been said wisely here, you interfere with their game.

You can immerse yourself in golf self-help books as I have. It works temporarily. But the best counsel I can offer is to know yourself, observe yourself dispassionately, golf in the present, the past shot means nothing other than learning from it, your past and future score mean nothing during a round - stay in the present. What others think about you should mean nothing to you - those are their issues unless you allow it to affect you.   Have a goal, but forget it as you go through the process (each shot), and tally up the results at the end of the day. If I had to put it in one word - awareness.

Thanks for the tales and lessons guys.  At 33 I still have a lot to learn in life and a long way to go.  Overall it was a great experience and something that I will be able to draw on for the rest of my life.

Nate

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Went to the range yesterday, played nine this morning and range work today, all focusing on more knee bend.  I am really liking the feeling.  Hitting the long clubs better already.  Especially the driver and 3w.  The long irons are starting to go higher as well with better face contact.  It is going to take some time to get get used to it but really like the added stability.  Not sure why this is helping me hit the long irons a bit better and higher, but if Mike says do it, I do. This video is with a 3 iron and shows the added knee bend.

Nate

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Great lookin' swing. I love the little abbreviated follow though. Looks great!

Ryan M
 
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IAD = ( [ADD] * .96 + [EPS] * [1/.12] ) / (1.15)
 
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ADD = Actual Driver Distance (in yards)
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  cipher said:
Originally Posted by cipher

A couple things that happened on the first two holes freaked me out and I could not recover mentally.  I am not really comfortable sharing all of it here publicly but it does not matter anyway.

At the risk of beating a dead horse, since none of us have any clue what those things may be, obviously I hope you're reading all of what we're saying with the understanding that we don't have the first idea about that stuff, so it may make 90% of what we're saying moot. Know what I mean?

Erik J. Barzeski —  I knock a ball. It goes in a gopher hole. 🏌🏼‍♂️
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  iacas said:
Originally Posted by iacas

At the risk of beating a dead horse, since none of us have any clue what those things may be, obviously I hope you're reading all of what we're saying with the understanding that we don't have the first idea about that stuff, so it may make 90% of what we're saying moot. Know what I mean?

I have slashed many a flat tire in my day, but yep I get it. I would say 99% of what you guys are saying is perfectly applicable to this situation.

Nate

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Do you usually grip down that far on the club? Or is this just because you were indoors and didn't want to risk hitting something?


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