Newbie Etiquette

[NeedAJoker]

Ugh I have been in a similar spot lately as I took up golf recently and all of my local friends are absolute hacks.  I got to a point where I was spending more time looking backwards at the group behind to see if they got to the tee yet and/or were flailing their arms at us, than I was thinking about my upcoming shot.  It is not a fun way to play golf.

In my experience, if he is a noob, he most likely will start getting slightly better and faster as he goes, and won't be so oblivious to his surroundings once he gets stuck behind a few slow groups and starts realizing how annoying it is.  

Maybe you can just dodge the next few rounds he goes out and hope that he begins to either:

A) Really enjoy the game and start putting time into learning and therefore speeding up

B) Continues to hack and give up the game

There obviously is the chance that he continues to play at the same terrible level and pace, but wouldn't his brother(your buddy) get fed up and say something?  If your buddy is unaware and oblivious, I can't imagine he is the best playing partner for the future anyways.

Kevin

[Rainmaker]

I would approach it directly next time it comes up to play together. I'd mention I thought we were too slow last time and need to pick it up so we don't back up the whole course.

Ive tried the "you play best ball while I play for score"...doesn't seem to work.  However when I myself commit to best ball as well, it's no problem. 

So yeah - I'd suggest beginner rules, scramble or best ball, etc. definitely double par max.  And whatever the game is it will probably go better if you all play the same game. 

[newtogolf]

His brother should be the one to educate the newbie on proper golf etiquette not you, since 1) he's the member and 2) he's related, so I'd suggest you speak with the brother.  

Many people don't realize there are accepted practices for new golfers and at the top of the list is you don't cause your group to fall behind the group in front of them.  Common practice is to pick up after double par, but in some cases that may even take too long if too much time is spent looking for lost balls.  

He may learn most from alternating taking a shot from the box on one hole and dropping from where you or your brothers drive landed this way he gets some experience from tee but also gets to play middle irons and putt.  Unless he's going to shoot less than 115, keeping score is not where his priority should be.  

 

[Gator Hazard]

5 hours ago, Valleygolfer said:

I suggest you talk to his brother about handling this prior to playing again. Maybe a max of ten shots and he's out of your "scoring game", what ever it is.

Give him a lesson on golf etiquette as well. Nicely of course. Explain to him that the golf course and people playing behind you require timely play and golf is more than just hacking away to the hole. If he doesn't want to do this, maybe it will just be you and his brother.

Could also suggest picking up and then putting on the green. Another way would be: once you have swung equal strokes  to par on the hole, if not on the green, drop 15 yards from green and chip up and putt out with a max of 10 strokes. 

I suck, sucked even more when I started but was always mindful of pace of play. he needs to be informed that if they cause delays the marshals will show up and force you to do things all while making your game much less enjoyable. 

[colin007]

Suggest going to the range until he has a swing that he can get to the green in a more reasonable number of attempts? Honestly, taking 15-20 shots per hole has NO PLACE on a course. It's unacceptable. Period.

[RandallT]

I agree with the consensus that his pace of play simply has to stop. 

If you tell him that a good rule of thumb is that you generally have to keep up with the group in front of you, then that's a pretty objective measure- so he won't think you're being picky about his pace of play. Tell him and your buddy:

1. He either figures out a way to do keep up from one of the suggestions you've given, or
2. You just can't play with him, because it impacts your reputation and enjoyment.

I'd say it matter-of-factly and good-naturedly. At least you'll have been clear, so that there's no misunderstanding, and it was his choice to not meet a basic point of etiquette, not yours. If he learns to keep up pace of play, all is good.

By keeping the discussion to near the pace of a group in front, it takes all the judgment out of it- just a simple yes/no as to whether he's succeeding at that. But based on his attitude of "hey I paid, so I'll play as I like" doesn't bode well. Tough situation when you're faced with that.

 

[No Mulligans]

Four groups played through, I'm guessing the course was fully booked.

If the course was full you really slowed down the pace for everyone behind you for the entire day.  Letting groups play through helps only a little as every time you let a group play through it doesn't help the groups still behind much, if at all.  When the course is full, instead of letting groups play through you should just skip holes to keep pace with the group ahead.  It is a drag but that is the best etiquette.  

I agree with a previous poster, play Stableford and pickup once you get to a double bogey on the hole.  The only trouble is the brother scoring a zero for the entire round might be less than satisfying for him.  You could adjust the scoring so a double = 1 pt., bogey = 2, par = 3, birdie = 6, eagle = 10.  At least this would give him a chance to accumulate some points, maybe.  The main thing is it would let you play your game and move the game along at a better pace.

[paininthenuts]

21 hours ago, Hardspoon said:

A scramble format is when everyone plays their shot from the location of the best previous shot (a lot of people refer to this as "best ball", but that is actually something different).

I agree that he needs to do something different...it is clearly affecting your enjoyment. 

In the UK we call it a Texas scramble

[Mixon]

It's tricky. I'm a newbie and I always play with my 6 year old boy. We have different problems but are fairly equally matched (he doesn't hit too far and I'm wildly inaccurate!).

We stick to Pitch n Putt or 'golf for all' courses as I'd hate to get in anyone's way. When my golfing friends offer to play with me, I say I want to get a bit better first.

Maybe the brother could encouraged to spend some time on range, or take some lessons? Realise his limitations?

[boogielicious]

13 hours ago, Mixon said:

It's tricky. I'm a newbie and I always play with my 6 year old boy. We have different problems but are fairly equally matched (he doesn't hit too far and I'm wildly inaccurate!).

We stick to Pitch n Putt or 'golf for all' courses as I'd hate to get in anyone's way. When my golfing friends offer to play with me, I say I want to get a bit better first.

Maybe the brother could encouraged to spend some time on range, or take some lessons? Realise his limitations?

The range can help build confidence. But  a scramble type format can keep the pace up and get you out on the course. I did this with my wife and friend's husband when they first started out. We played six or seven 9 hole rounds like this until they got comfortable.

They idea is to not worry about recovering after a flubbed shot, which will happen. Just pick up and move the ball to where the best shot of you group is and play your next shot there. Once on the green, everyone putts. Eventually, they got confident enough to play all shots as will you. 

[Mixon]

12 minutes ago, boogielicious said:

The range can help build confidence. But  a scramble type format can keep the pace up and get you out on the course. I did this with my wife and friend's husband when they first started out. We played six or seven 9 hole rounds like this until they got comfortable.

They idea is to not worry about recovering after a flubbed shot, which will happen. Just pick up and move the ball to where the best shot of you group is and play your next shot there. Once on the green, everyone putts. Eventually, they got confident enough to play all shots as will you. 

True. I guess the only way to get good at playing golf - is to actually PLAY golf

[stealthhwk]

Im just always up front with people I play with. I usually start with this " I dont care if your scratch or if u suck. Have fun and keep pace, thats all I ask." If someone in my group doesnt hold up their end, I give them two options; 1: play to double par then pick up. 2: play best ball. If that doesnt clean it up, I get brutally honest and if that doesnt work, that person is no longer allowed to play with me.

[Machine528]

This has been my problem my entire life.  I have always been a super fast player.  I do not take practice swings,  I do not eye shots up from behind,  I do not calculate yardages,  I have always played by eye.  One of our regulars is a horrible golfer and not very athletic which is fine but he takes three practice swings and if one of them doesn't feel right he will take 3 more.   He also loves to line every single put up from every angle on the green.   I know I should not care but when I am sensing we are playing slow it feels like my insides are boiling.  Some of my absolute worst rounds have been with him because It takes me right out of my game.     I have gotten to the point where I will only play with him in scrambles.   I do not know if this is a trend because as of late It seems like most people I play with take preshot routines to the next level..... even though they cant get the ball airborne on most shots.