What does golf do for you?

[shaank0]

I took up golf this last year and its on my mind all the time. I live in Michigan so i haven't played since mid November (freezing my butt off).

I love the game, and although im not amazing at it.. yet i think it gave something to me i cant really explain. When i am on that course nothing comes into my mind other than golf. Which is a relief in my current life.

I am 25 years old and married I have a 16month old boy and another child on the way (wife forgot the birth control haha). I graduated HS in 2003 and went straight to work in construction under my father full time doing finish carpentry. I made very good money for my age and in 2006 I was basically running the company. I had a house, 2 vehicles and a pretty good life.

Then my life changed My wife and I decided to try and have a child. She got pregnant but lost it in a miscarriage soon after. She was crushed and was depressed and determined to get pregnant again as soon as possible. Soon after the miscarriage work took a big hit. We had signed a contract for a 500 home subdivision in Okemos (pretty popular city in Michigan near Lansing) after finishing around 10 homes the company killed the contract and i believe filed bankruptcy soon after. This killed my income.

the months followed got even worse. My wife was hellbent on bringing a child into this world, and after she got pregnant again we found out she had a Atopic pregnancy (where the egg gets stuck in the Tube i believe) So she had to go through surgery and remove it thus losing the baby.We now had to wait a year to try and have a child again. My wife was now crushed and depressed again and I was struggling to find work.

Once I did finally find some job site to work on we were getting screwed left and right. The only work that was going on was Custom homes usually 10,000 sqft which was awesome because there was a couple months of work there. Well eventually the guy kept holding money and we got screwed out of 10,000 dollars. My life started falling apart... at 24 I had to file bankruptcy and I pretty much lost everything. This now took a toll on me I wanted to seriously just die. I couldn't handle my life as it felt like it was spiraling under control. I think i sat in a depressed state doing nothing for a close to a year.

in the coming months my wife became pregnant (which wasn't the best time to bring a child into this world but the depression she felt when thinking of not being able to be a mother really hurt her) and thankfully everything was ok minus the delivery where they were both having problems.

Her uterus wouldn't contract so she kept bleeding, and my son was having problems from pooping before delivery so crap was in his lungs. I thought the world was ending. I was trying to stay calm because my wife kept asking "Is this normal? ... is this normal?
The doctor was just punching her stomach basically to contract her uterus.
This was probably the scariest moment in my life.

Thankfully everything turned out fine. I had a beautiful son that seemed to breath new life into me as i think it does with every parent.

Well now im trying to think of what to do...after applying to tons of jobs and not having any luck in this hell hole of a state I decided to go to school for nursing. My wife and I live with her parents along with her sister and her son.
needless to say the house is cramped and very loud with 2 young ones running around.

If all goes well I will be done with my Prerequisites and apply to the Nursing program. Which I am now learning that i will most likely have to wait to get in which could be a year or even more since so many people are applying to it.

As it is now I cannot get a job, not because i cant get hired but i don't have the time. I am a stay at home father who has to schedule his schooling around other peoples schedules so I have someone to watch my son. I am literally up till 3am at least 5 days of the weak for that i can usually start studying at 10pm after my son goes to bed. Usually to wake up at 8:30 with my son.

This has taken a toll on my body. Sometimes it seems when i finally do get into bed that i stare at the ceiling all night.

My wife works a full time job as a claims rep making 14/hr which makes things very tight.

So needless to say life has been hectic, and depressing through the past few years, Not to mention we have had many glimmers of hope that could of changed our lives substantially but fell through. The worse being a promotion where they told my wife she got the job only for them to come back and say the higher up people said they couldn't hire her because she did not have a bachelors degree. This was depressing because the pay raise would of allowed us to get our own place and live a lot more comfortably.


I believe it was last May my father asked me if I wanted to go golfing. I said sure and something happened where i was just addicted.

I was lucky enough to do some work for my mother in exchange for a golf membership at a place that offers 2 courses per membership.

I took some of my loan money and bought some nice clubs which you can see in my signature.

As it being winter in Michigan it is quite depressing not to be able to play but i bought a net and mat to practice in the garage =).

I told my wife I have at least 2 years to become a PGA professional or a Nurse ha ha.

I have always been naturally good at sports, which i think is why i love golf because i am not naturally good at it. I love that essentially the only factor that can play against you is really mother nature, other than that its you vs yourself.

Golf has allowed me an outlet to clear my head of the 100's of things racing through it at any given time.

I am just wondering are there any stories like mine where golf has changed you or helped you get through situations in life.

[chilly]

I'm sorry if this comes off harsh, but how do you declare bankruptcy and claim that you don't have time to find a job, but at the same time tell us how you used loan money to purchase expensive clubs, exchanged work for a club membership (versus cash), and have purchased items for an indoor range so you can have time to practice your game? Maybe I don't know the whole situation, but if I was her old man and you were living under my roof, we'd have a conversation about priorities.

[Yukari]

Well, I am not going to judge your situation and will only answer what you had asked for.

I took up playing golf after years of hounding by my father to pick up the game. Since then, I spent many days playing golf with my parents and my brother. Now that my father is no longer with us, I wish I had picked up the game earlier so that I would have spent a lot more time with him.

Basically, playing golf does two things for me. First it clears my head of all the stress of daily life--deadlines, work load, etc. And believe me as a patent attorney, we have one of the most stressful work schedule because if we miss one deadline, there is a potential for millions of $$$ of malpractice suit. I often wake up at 1 or 2 in the morning sweating to figure out if I filed certain things on time or not. When I play golf, I forget everything about work and other stuff. It is relaxation from work for me (although I sometime do get stressed out about the game itself when my swing goes south--but it is not nearly as bad a stress as my work).

Another thing playing golf does for me is that it reminds me of days spent playing with my dad. Nothing but fond memories. I don't even recall ever having any bad swing days when I played with my dad. May he rest in peace.

[Addicted2Golf]

Golf has been very similar for me. I haven't gone through all the crazy things you've described, but I do find myself in a job situation that I really dislike and am having a hard time getting out of. When I started business school, the economy was great. The day I walked out of school, I had an MBA, with zero job prospects. Golf is an area in my life where the control is mine. Others' decisions determine whether or not I will be able to land certain jobs, but my decisions and actions affect whether or not the ball goes in the hole. I like the feeling golf gives me when the frustrations of a job I dislike want to take over.

On a side note, anybody know of finance jobs for a recent MBA grad?

[GaijinGolfer]

For me, golf is a temporary escape from the day to day hassles and stresses in my life. For as long as Im on the course, my mind is focused on nothing but the shot Im about to hit. Not about my stresses with work or family or money; just golf.
Also, I love the endless challenge that is golf. No matter how good you get at this game, unless you are getting an ace on every hole (not likely), you can always get better at this game.

[Nickynoodles]

Wow the first half of your story is me to the T. Except for the 2nd half.
Im 26 years old, engaged and have a 11 month old daughter. My fiance got pregnant and had a miscarriage, she to was devistated. She got pregnant again 8 months later. Everything was fine then they noticed her hormone levels were not going up as fast as they should have with a normal pregnancy. They came to find out she was atopic. The baby was in her tubes and if it was to stay that way the tubes would rupture and she could die. She had surgery and had to stay in the hospital. I stayed with her the night as she was all doped up crying. It was pretty sad for me also, i thought we were having a baby then you find out it has to be removed. Well 10 months later she was pregnant again and everything went great and we have a beautiful baby girl that turns a year Jan 25th. I am to a finish carpenter. I also do some painting on the side for extra cash. Amazing how i was reading your story and im like holy shit this is my life. Only difference i have my own place and still have a job, even tho i could be laid off at anytime with the way this economy still is and noone is getting any work done. 3 years ago i was so busy i could pull my hair out its crazy how quick everything can change. Now to get to your question. There are a few reasons i Golf. 1. I love all sports and play them all, i played football for 8 years in school and still play adult flag football. I played Baseball 12 years and still mess around hitting balls or play homerun derby every now and again. I have also played Volleyball, Basketball, Hockey and a little Soccer. 2. I love anything with a score and that has a winner and a loser, i love competition. 3. Golf is the hardest sport to be consistantly good at. It takes tons of practice and its still hard. If you love a challenge then Golfs the sport for you. and 4. The main reason i think everyone plays Golf for. You can escape reality. When your out on the course theres nothing in your mind but Golf. Your outdoors with your buddies and your laughing and having a good time. Theres no worries, just you, your clubs, your friends and your golf ball. Nothing is more relaxing on your mind then Golf. And thats why i love this sport.

[whip_it_out]

It's hopefully going to be a ticket to college

The top guy on my team is getting a full ride, and in four years, I hope to be in his spot. Would be really nice not to have to pay the ridiculous amount of money tuition is.

[shaank0]

I'm sorry if this comes off harsh, but how do you declare bankruptcy and claim that you don't have time to find a job, but at the same time tell us how you used loan money to purchase expensive clubs, exchanged work for a club membership (versus cash), and have purchased items for an indoor range so you can have time to practice your game? Maybe I don't know the whole situation, but if I was her old man and you were living under my roof, we'd have a conversation about priorities.

Very valid questions, and I think I got a little overboard with my post as it was not meant to be a big story but rather a question. I just read over it again and it seems like i made a Venting post.

Declaring bankruptcy was the hardest thing for me to do as I am a prideful person, but i had no choice. and for not having time to find a job I really dont. Last summer i dropped one of my 6 week online classes due to it being pretty hard online. So this gave me 6 weeks free which I loved. This gave me a lot of golf time to play as my father and my father in law was laid off we took up golf together. Now I still do side jobs here and there on weekends when I can get away long enough to do some work usually found by my brother in law and other miscellaneous ways posting ads and such on craigslist and all that. The Loan was a student loan. I am fortunate enough to get school pretty much paid for. So trying to be money smart I don't use all of the loans that are available to me. I did splurge on the set of golf clubs though they are not all new. Thank god for ebay. The membership came from work done for my mother. I put her roof on her house and spent 2weeks doing it altogether which is a hell of a long time for a roof ( professional roofers could of done in 2days with a full crew), but it was only my father and I working on it both have only limited experience roofing though I wouldn't call it hard by any means. As for cash vs the membership it was discussed between my wife and I to just ask for a golf membership and a club fitting which is not expensive and doesnt even come close to what would be owed but my wife and I have helped out with my in laws in the past so we deemed it only fair. As for priorities i don't know what you mean. I believe i have them in order. I am in school and it is really hard in their medical program. I feel that I am a great father. My greatest joy with my son is just lying next to him while he sleeps and just looking at him I hate to sound dramatic but if I did not have my son in my life I would of probably given up on my life and disappeared. I do wish I had not read your post as you have put into question how much time with i have this coming spring and summer. Which if i'm correct not much! but hey 9 holes a couple times a week ( i sure hope) is better then nothing.

[shaank0]

Wow the first half of your story is me to the T. Except for the 2nd half.

Congrats on your daughter. I am hoping for a daughter this time around =)

[shaank0]

It's hopefully going to be a ticket to college

That would be so awesome. I remember in high school we finally had a golf team a year in or something like that and i remember I was one of those people who knocked sports like golf down. Man do I wish i would of joined up and played.

Good luck I hope you do get a scholarship.

[Lefty-Golfer]

I don't know about everyone else but I started with nothing, worked hard, built a business, made some money, got the golf bug, joined a club and now can't play enough...it seems to me you need to get your life in order before golf matters or is even on the radar.

[leo3]

I don't know about everyone else but I started with nothing, worked hard, built a business, made some money, got the golf bug, joined a club and now can't play enough...it seems to me you need to get your life in order before golf matters or is even on the radar.

+1 Getting on a secure career track, and making sure your family is provided for come first. Take care of these, and there will be plenty of time for golf later.

[mtsalmela80]

I don't know about everyone else but I started with nothing, worked hard, built a business, made some money, got the golf bug, joined a club and now can't play enough...it seems to me you need to get your life in order before golf matters or is even on the radar.

??? Get your life together BEFORE worrying about golf? Isnt this a golf forum? I figure one can always work towards a better life AND play. Heck Im doing it.

Golf is the easiest way to get out of myself besides drugs or alcohol, and those just land me in jail! So its nothing but golf now!

[HoosierGolfer]

I have been playing golf most of my life (I'm 47). Golf has done many things for me, all of them good. I have made many very good friends on the course over the years. I have also made many good friends here on the net through my hobby of collecting putters and related items.
Golf is something my wife and I do together at least a couple of times a week while on other days golf allow's me "guy time" with my close friends, on the course where being ridiculed is a way of life, but all done in good fun. I have had laughs on the course that has taken me to my knees and I think I have dropped a tear or two on the course while playing with a friend who's life has maybe taken a turn for the worse because of divorce, loss of job....whatever....as the game brings us together.
I have also built a close relationship over the years with our course owner and his family and I have been there when their kids were born, watched them grow up and become good players and good people. This is what keeps me playing. Golf brings joy and with todays world, it is not easy to find something to laugh about everyday, but I always get a smile on my face at the golf course.

[tm22721]

Wow the recession in Japan caused memberships to decline 95%. We Americans appear to be taking up golf in hard times rather than dropping it.

[right handed phil mickelson]

Golf.

It's a game where anyone can go out on a nice peaceful golf course, and get away from the pressures of life. I think for everyone, golf does just that. That's why over 60 million people worldwide choose to play this wonderful game.

What does golf do for me? I'm 15 years old and still in high school. Golf isn't necessarily for me a chance to get away from anything, because I work at the golf course here, and my girlfriend plays golf (and is better than me and I hate it so much...). Golf is a chance for me to focus on something else entirely. It's just a chance for me to do something I'm good at, and I enjoy it because of it's difficulty.

Right now golf is a career possibility for me. I have some time to hone my game before I go into college in a few years, where I will hopefully play college golf (crossing my fingers for a scholarship). I'm in school trying to major in architecture right now. I have 2 more years of drafting and then I can go into it in college. The real main thing I want to do is to design and build golf courses (if there's any room left when I get out of college haha). I really want anything I do to be centered around golf.

Golf is the only sport where I find ALMOST everyone is kind, and respectful. It's a gentlemans game. You can't really say that about any other sport. Golf is THE most complicated sport to play. It's also one of the humblest. More professionals in golf give back to charities and the community than any other sport.

Golf is going to provide me with a job, many many good friends, and right now a beautiful girl. That's what golf has done, and will do for me.

[flopdarock]

hmmm i understand the need to prioritize certain things in life...
but to say 'you should just quit golf and make more money first'... or 'dont play cuz youre not rich enough yet' is just lame...
golf to some ppl is an escape... why the fawk do rich ppl need to escape anything? golf to rich ppl is a way to waste time that they have plenty of...
i say whats wrong with playing golf while trying to make a living... its not like that guy is a crack addict who's selling his child for his next hit... maybe his situation isnt ideal but to tell him to quit playing... wow

[DavidFehertysBike]

I play golf as an avenue to compete. I played baseball from babe ruth through college, so after i graduated and there was no more baseball, a huge void delveloped in my life. I needed to remain competitive at something so i picked up golf and took to the game very quickly.