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I am so frustrated and want to quit golf

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34 minutes ago, Hacker James said:

Everybody wants to be better at this game. if someone says, "I really do not care, I just want to get and enjoy the game" is only lying to themselves. There are plateaus. Age plays a factor. Then there is the mental side.

I have seen some improvement over the past year, but simply have lost distance. I just have to accept the fact, that I am not going to hit the ball as far as I did a few years ago. It seems to be exponential in that over the age of 70, it seems to progress at  a more rapid rate than one might expect. That being said, my short game is adequate, and there are days when I shine in that department.

Now for the mental, here is an example.  The other morning, I needed to get out of the house to clear my head owing to some family related stress and strife.  I arrived at the golf course with what I thought to be a clear head and told myself I was going to enjoy the day away from all the stress.  Well, my "self" wasn't having it.  From the first tee, horrible duck hook. Reloaded and fire again, This time a slice and OB right.  Okay, time to slow down, concentrate. Third attempt, ball went straight down the middle, but barely made it 100 yards. It got progressively worse, each swing became a mystery swing. If there were a lake or pond between me and the hole, even if not in line, my ball would find it. If there were a bunker anywhere in the vicinity, I would find it, taking 3 or 4 swats to get out.  Finally after four holes of this, I packed it in and went home.

I played again a week later and shot an 81.  I have not broken 80 this year, but have come close several times. I may not make it, but do have solace in the fact that 18 months or so ago, I did twice.  Currently, anything in the 90's is fine and I am not expecting much more. Those few mid 80's are just icing. If I live long enough, I WILL shoot my age. (75 now). err....maybe yes,maybe no. 

There’s some truth in this statement, but it’s not lying to yourself to just be as good as you can get and be “reasonable” about it.

Life is too short to spend every waking moment trying to get better at something you might only be so capable at doing?

I agree that you should optimize your swing as well as you can, and that’s always “work in progress”. It never really stops. The question is how much effort should you put into it?

This last week, I played the best golf in my life, and enjoyed it. Didn’t score my lowest, but it felt really good. Plus, I’ve only had 3 clinics and 2 lessons this last month to improve from crappy Golf (for me) from a long break to what I consider good enough golf. Planning on more lessons, but only as needed. Clinics will be on a twice a week basis.

Am I lying to myself to think I won’t get much better? I don’t think so. OTOH, if I thought I could get to scratch with a lot of work, I feel like I would be lying to myself.

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1 hour ago, Hacker James said:

Everybody wants to be better at this game. if someone says, "I really do not care, I just want to get and enjoy the game" is only lying to themselves.

I disagree and am a bit surprised that you don't know at least one person who feels this way. There are many people who play this game and are perfectly fine playing at their current level. While I'm not there yet, I hope to be one of them at some point.

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44 minutes ago, JonMA1 said:

I disagree and am a bit surprised that you don't know at least one person who feels this way. There are many people who play this game and are perfectly fine playing at their current level. While I'm not there yet, I hope to be one of them at some point.

What people say and what people really feel are not mutually inclusive.  I would agree that many people can find comfort at their level of play, but not to the extent that they would not want to do better. Somewhat akin to Fishermen and Real Estate Buyers.  Otherwise, why the frustration? 

"Trust everyone, but cut the cards"

Edited by Hacker James

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20 minutes ago, Hacker James said:

What people say and what people really feel are not mutually inclusive.  I would agree that many people can find comfort at their level of play, but not to the extent that they would not want to do better. Somewhat akin to Fishermen and Real Estate Buyers.  Otherwise, why the frustration? 

"Trust everyone, but cut the cards"

This is true, but there are more people with realistic expectations about their ability than there are Tour pro wannabes. The ones that play for some time tend to know their games and settle in to what they can do.

Your fisherman comments reminded me of this sign hanging above the main entrance to Bass Pro: ”Welcome Hunters, Fisherman and other Liars”

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29 minutes ago, Hacker James said:

What people say and what people really feel are not mutually inclusive.  I would agree that many people can find comfort at their level of play, but not to the extent that they would not want to do better.

I suppose we'll have to agree to disagree.

Of the three people I play with on a semi-regular basis, one of them works on his game in hopes of improving, the second works on his game to maintain the level he's at, while the third never practices and enjoys a round of golf regardless of the score. It has little to do with anything they say.

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sounds about right.  

When someone says "size does not matter".......she says....."wanna bet?"

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On 10/22/2017 at 11:27 AM, Jack Watson said:

The mantra on this site is that golf is practically impossible and I disagree.

Nope. Not remotely close to the truth.

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I recall several threads where the statement :"Golf is hard", but none saying it was impossible.

reminds me of the line in the movie The Godfather when planning to "eliminate" one of the rivals.

"Difficult, not impossible".

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Frustration arises when you don't hit the shot remotely similar to how you hit it previously. Regression is tough but THAT MUCH regression is soul crippling. 

When you start identifying more with the game where you top and dribble and hook and slice MUCH more than the fleeting game of the three good shots you hit a round, the writing is on the wall. I think this is where short term memory can be the one thing that carries you. It's a strange paradox.

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5 minutes ago, GolfLug said:

Frustration arises when you don't hit the shot remotely similar to how you hit it previously. Regression is tough but THAT MUCH regression is soul crippling. 

When you start identifying more with the game where you top and dribble and hook and slice MUCH more than the fleeting game of the three good shots you hit a round, the writing is on the wall. I think this is where short term memory can be the one thing that carries you. It's a strange paradox.

How true, the writing on the wall got bigger and bigger each time I played last year...unfortunately I dont have short term memory nor tolerance for that kind of game...I made the best decision for me and Golf....and I still love the game..as long as I am watching it and not playing it.

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11 hours ago, iacas said:

Nope. Not remotely close to the truth.

Very true. I think golf is a hard as you make it. If you are striving for that single figure handicap then its going to get harder. Keep realistic expectaions and dont lose sight of the real reason we all play this crazy game.......fun and enjoyment.

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9 hours ago, RussUK said:

Very true. I think golf is a hard as you make it. If you are striving for that single figure handicap then its going to get harder. Keep realistic expectaions and dont lose sight of the real reason we all play this crazy game.......fun and enjoyment.

Exactly.

As far as expectations, many of us just want to see some improvement. Realistic is relative, but bogey golf shouldn't be impossible for us when we put thoughtful effort into it. Yet, that seems to be the case with a few of us. And none of us are talking about giving it a few months before saying "nope... can't be done".

When those of us who really love this game come to the realization that our potential is much lower than most, it can be a real kick in the nuts. 

But as you said, it's suppose to be fun and whether we reach our limit in the 70's or the 90's. At some point we have to find the enjoyment and appreciate the opportunity that others never come close to having.

Edited by JonMA1

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