The Most Annoying Golf Partners

[Moppy]

What I do when getting ready to play is to make sure my rangefinder is extremely easy to whip out and shoot so I don't waste anybody's time. I have to admit that I am often impressed by old guys who can guesstimate within 5 yards pretty often. Maybe I will be able to do that in a couple of years with the rangefinder.

[jetsknicks1]

I've only had two partners that I'd classify as annoying, and one who took this to a new level. I finished a round with this guy one week and he asked if I'd be interested in playing the following week. The guy seemed perfectly normal so we exchanged phone numbers (which my wife of course referred to as the start of a blossoming bro-mance). So the next week we met up at the club where he insisted I drive the cart (I prefer to walk but agreed to get a cart at his request). He then started to get agitated if I didn't drive exactly right or stop the cart in exactly the right spot in the fairway (told me he couldn't make a swing if the cart wasn't in his line of sight). At one point I asked him if he wanted to drive the cart which he declined. This came to a boiling point on the last hole when I stopped the cart within 10 yards of where our tee shots landed. When he got to his ball, he decided he needed a different club and instead of walking back to the cart, angrily gestured for me to drive over at which I replied "are you $%#ing kidding me?!!". We shook hands after we sank our last putts and I never heard from him again. The other annoying partner insisted on teaching me everything there was to know about how to play a round of golf.

Reminds me of Backseat driver guy. I play with a buddy who never wants to to drive but has no problem telling the other guy how to drive. "My ball went by that tree to the left, the left, the left!" Uhhhhh, I see your ball buddy.

[newtogolf]

The Time Keeper Guy - believes he's a good enough golfer to warrant all the time he needs to take his shot but is always rushing others in his group so they don't fall behind.

[Gboroman]

The Medical Condition Guy

It starts with a discussion regarding the fluid buildup in his lower back when putting the first green. The second hole features a brief insight into the guy’s struggle with skin rashes. Holes 3 thru 5 cover the topics of nerve damage, infected toenails and slippage of the kneecaps. As you make the turn, the conversation goes to the digestive system and delves into a dialogue about the untreatable partial blockage of his sigmoid colon. Holes 12 thru 15 cover all of his 14 operations including the removal of his left testicle that as a youth was undescended but never treated. Hole 16 covers the collapsed lung in 1986, while holes 17 and 18 wrap up the round with a narrative on prostatitis and the removal of a cyst in his neck.

Haha.  Reminds of the guy I play with.  He doesn't have all those medical conditions during the same round, but he always shows up with a different medical condition every round.  Usually, it's some kind of muscle strain in a different part of his body he got lifting weights or working in the house/yard that week.  Last week, it was poison oak on his leg.  Other times, its some kind of digestive problem.  He's not that old, but he has to stretch before every shot because his neck/shoulder/back/whatever is sooooo tight.

[Gboroman]

Slow-play Joke Teller Guy.

This guy has already caused you to fall 2 holes behind, but interrupts his pre-shot routine on the tee box for 5 minutes to tell his unfunny joke.  Meanwhile, you are uncomfortably watching the group finish up on the green behind you.

[Lihu]

Slow-play Joke Teller Guy.

This guy has already caused you to fall 2 holes behind, but interrupts his pre-shot routine on the tee box for 5 minutes to tell his unfunny joke.  Meanwhile, you are uncomfortably watching the group finish up on the green behind you.

Doesn't even have to be a joke he's telling. It could be just some anecdote about some hole he's played.

I hooked up with some folks, and asked a couple questions in response to something one person stated. Short of actually slapping their foreheads, his previously partnered golfers looked extremely displeased by me asking them.

He setup for his putt a few times and talked in between the setups for more than a few minutes. The other golfers looked like they were ready to kill him or me. . .

And so it continued for the remaining 12 holes. . .even though I stopped asking questions. . .

[natureboy]

I'm probably the Christopher Columbus guy. I rarely take the full 5 minutes, but lost balls are so costly I do expect a little effort from the playing partner out of courtesy. I more than reciprocate.

I was a sand-whacker, but reformed quickly after only a few transgressions.

[RFKFREAK]

I'm probably the Christopher Columbus guy. I rarely take the full 5 minutes, but lost balls are so costly I do expect a little effort from the playing partner out of courtesy. I more than reciprocate. I was a sand-whacker, but reformed quickly after only a few transgressions.

Haha, I'm going to like golfing with you. ;)

[natureboy]

Haha, I'm going to like golfing with you. ;)

I've almost always hit a provisional, but if it's potentially findable I do consider 1 minute from playing partners to be about a minimum. It won't raise any steam for me if you walk right by it, but I will think less of you.

On the plus side, I did manage my first round last year without losing a ball and I used driver on most driving holes.

[RFKFREAK]

I've almost always hit a provisional, but if it's potentially findable I do consider 1 minute from playing partners to be about a minimum. It won't raise any steam for me if you walk right by it, but I will think less of you.

On the plus side, I did manage my first round last year without losing a ball and I used driver on most driving holes.

I'm not sure if you mean "you" as in me specifically or "you" as someone you're playing with but in case it's the former, generally speaking, I'll go help someone look for their ball because, invariably, I spend so much time looking for mine that I appreciate any help I can get and feel that if you help others look for their balls, they'll be more inclined to help you look for yours.

Nice!  I think I did that once last year.  It felt weird playing a round without carding a penalty stroke after having like 5 the round before, haha.

[dfreuter415]

Which one of these applies to you?  Haha

I'm definitely #6, #20, and #27!

http://www.golfdigest.com/golf/humor/18-most-annoying-golf-partners

#35 - The Jinx
Defining characteristics: Thinks he's being nice by telling you this is the best he's seen you play. Only introduces the notion that it can't last. Favorite expression: "Somebody is going to break 80 for the first time!"

Me: I just try to put a positive on my playing partner's game.

#14 - Mulligan Guy
Defining characteristics: Liberally allows himself another whack even when first shot is findable.
Favorite expression: "Wait, wait, wait. I gotta try another."

Me: I don't want to walk back to my last shot, just in case I can't find the ball.

#25 - The Raker
Defining characteristics: Shamelessly gives himself any putt within earshot of the cup, regardless of what's on the line.  Favorite expression: "I'll just get this out of the way. . ."

Me: I like to live by the rule, "It is more blessed to give than receive." That includes putts.

[Torres9]

Ok. This one made me chuckle. I had fun reading these. I feel like i play with a few Mr. Magoo's and overactive bladder guys in my Sunday Judges group.

[ibreakdrivers]

Not sure which one this qualifies as but I have a couple buddies who won't give themselves anything above a triple bogey because they can't report it for their handicap. I have tried to explain thats not how it works too many times, I've given up that argument.

[Ferguson]

Not sure which one this qualifies as but I have a couple buddies who won't give themselves anything above a triple bogey because they can't report it for their handicap. I have tried to explain thats not how it works too many times, I've given up that argument.

Equitable Stroke Control Section 4 Adjusting Hole Scores for Equitable Stroke Control (ESC)™ Q. What is the current method for adjusting my hole scores under Equitable Stroke Control (ESC)? A. ESC is an adjustment of individual hole scores (for handicap purposes) in order to make handicaps more representative of a player's potential ability. ESC is applied after the round and is only used when the actual score or the most likely score exceeds a player’s maximum number. ESC sets a limit to the number of strokes a player can take on a hole depending on Course Handicap™. Apply ESC to all scores, including tournament scores. Below is the maximum number a player can take: Course Handicap Maximum Number 9 or less Double Bogey 10-19 7 20-29 8 30-39 9 40 and above 10

[ibreakdrivers]

appreciate the info, interesting to read it written out like that.

[Dave2512]

Heck I'd rather someone pick it up than witness the self  torture. But my experience is golfers with legit handicaps don't face many ESC situations. Anyone that is would see a handicap spike from the other high hole scores they can't blow off being the high instance of holes requiring it would be an indicator they are playing poor golf in general. Though the ranges are pretty broad.

[Lihu]

Heck I'd rather someone pick it up than witness the self  torture. But my experience is golfers with legit handicaps don't face many ESC situations. Anyone that is would see a handicap spike from the other high hole scores they can't blow off being the high instance of holes requiring it would be an indicator they are playing poor golf in general. Though the ranges are pretty broad.

It's rare to reach ESC, but it happens. I report scores with straight score, but post with ESC for handicap as required by the appropriate rules.

[frohlic]

hard to decide for me :D only been playing for 2 years so not that much time to develop any habits :D maybe #6 The Air Counter but just to count every shot in our group of three on the way to the next tee box...