I am calling you out as a non-golfer IF.........................

[weekend hacker1]

..if you play anything other than a ProV1s.

Yeah that's right, Rory McIlroy isn't a real golfer.

[weekend hacker1]

...you drive a golf cart.

[inthehole]

...you drive a golf cart.

phew, I usually ride

[davedove]

I'm definitely a non-golfer. I know a couple of golfers and can tell when I play with them that I don't qualify. They don't have many bad rounds and are usually around par or better.

I also ALWAYS have a ball retriever in my bag. I probably have retrieved other people's golf balls 20 to 1 over retrieving my own.

Note: I have also retrieved a few balls for the few "golfers" that I know since they never have a ball retriever in their bag.

It's always ironic how some people look down on those with retrievers, yet seem really happy when someone with a retriever gets a ball back for them.

[David in FL]

It's always ironic how some people look down on those with retrievers, yet seem really happy when someone with a retriever gets a ball back for them.

Not me!

A golf ball with a demonstrated affinity for the water has a horrible character flaw that cannot be changed.  It should never be trusted again!

[David in FL]

phew, I usually ride

Damn, I usually drive.  I may have to letting someone else do that too......

[mcanadiens]

Not me!

A golf ball with a demonstrated affinity for the water has a horrible character flaw that cannot be changed.  It should never be trusted again!

And there is that superstition that a non-golfer would find ridiculous. You, Mr. David in FL, are a golfer in my book.

[colin007]

Some of us can't, because it never really gets that cold.

go to hell.

[MS256]

It's always ironic how some people look down on those with retrievers, yet seem really happy when someone with a retriever gets a ball back for them.

My ball retriever gets taken out of my bag and used nearly 100% of the time on the island green during our Saturday game, and not by me.

If I miss I usually miss so badly that a ball retriever would do me no good and I don't carry scuba gear.

[davechen]

Haha, Well this rules me out as a golfer. I'm not a ball snob.

High five!  I'm also not real particular about golf balls.  I do try to avoid balls that putt like rocks (Pinnacle, Rock Flite).  My son is turning into a ball snob.  He learned that a lot of pro's use Pro V1s, so now he wants to use them all the time (except on water holes ).  Now any time I find a Pro V1 on the course, I give it to him.

If you don't spend most of your work day on thesandtrap.com no matter how many times they have threatened to fire you.

And I am still a real golfer since I switched to ProV1s about a month ago. That one almost got me. Not that I need a list to validate it. My wife and I went golfing yesterday in a light rain the entire round, CPO and we were the only ones on the course when we started and finished. After that I can't possilby lose my 'real golfer" card.

I'm on here ALL THE TIME.  Doesn't threaten my job security though.  Your tax dollar at work.

You're definetly a non-golfer if you don't have a ridiculous looking tan line where your socks are!!!

Guilty!

[3putter]

Do we need to set up an RGI (Real Golfer IndexTM)?

It would be based on our behavior over the last 20 rounds, of course, taking our best behavior-laden rounds.  Probably need to set up a set of rules to allow for some deviations from place to place:  different courses would have different ratings (some things tolerated or not, based on the local social environment and setup of the course).

Oh this is a sweet sounding idea

High five!  I'm also not real particular about golf balls.  I do try to avoid balls that putt like rocks (Pinnacle, Rock Flite).  My son is turning into a ball snob.  He learned that a lot of pro's use Pro V1s, so now he wants to use them all the time (except on water holes ).  Now any time I find a Pro V1 on the course, I give it to him.

I even scoop as low as pinnacle golds, but that's where I draw the line. I play non-premium balls off the first tee since don't always pipe down the middle....best to pay the gods with a pinnacle than a premium ball. As a real golfer though, I do count my penalties when applicable.

[caniac6]

If you look down your nose at anything anyone else does to enjoy the game. Mind your own business.

[Hardballs]

Your not a real golfer if your ,.....happy that your friend just beat your personal best! (Happened recently, but I matched it a short while after.. Phew)

[mcanadiens]

Your not a real golfer if your ,.....happy that your friend just beat your personal best!

(Happened recently, but I matched it a short while after.. Phew)

Actually, that happened to me recently.

I shot an 85, my personal best so far. My buddy shot a 78, his personal best. Even if he played it straight, he'd have beat me by a couple of strokes. I was very polite seeing him off. Then I stewed about it for the rest of the night.

[davedove]

Not me!

A golf ball with a demonstrated affinity for the water has a horrible character flaw that cannot be changed.  It should never be trusted again!

Yeah, I've always heard you should never wash a ball before hitting over water for that very reason.  It might like the water too much!

[late347]

-Real golfers are those who have a good swing, such as Sam Snead, Bobby Jones, Jack Nicklaus etc..

-Only those who play aggressive golf, are real golfers. Conservative "avoid mistake strategy" is only used by phonies and posers...  (this definition might make Tiger Woods, the only real golfer, I suppose, Tiger was always aggressive in his good playing days! )

-Golfers who have absurd pre-shot routines, are not real golfers. Prime example of absurd pre-shot routine is Keegan Bradley. He stalks the golf ball, when he walks back to the ball after looking at his aiming line, as if the stationary golf ball were some dangerous wild animal, ready to attack him, or something like that. Moreover, Keegan Bradley's "putting evil eye routine", is prime example of a fake golfer characteristic

-Unfortunately that makes us rest, only a bunch of hackers and phonies, hacking balls around a green grass field, aimlessly.

[jimbo60]

You're a non-golfer if you say..."Let's go golfing". instead of "Let's go play golf"  I'm sure it's grammatically correct but it drives me nuts to hear.  Also, you're definitely a non-golfer if you don't remove the stickers from from your clubs after a purchase.

[mvmac]

You're a non-golfer if you say..."Let's go golfing". instead of "Let's go play golf"  I'm sure it's grammatically correct but it drives me nuts to hear.  Also, you're definitely a non-golfer if you don't remove the stickers from from your clubs after a purchase.

Those are good ones.

I'll add one, you're a non-golfer if you think your mental game is holding you back from being a scratch golfer.