The Most Annoying Golf Partners

[Lihu]

I have what I have found over the years a pretty unique outlook when playing golf. Annoyances never bothered me. I just look at that kind of stuff that happens on the golf course as entertaining. Sure there have been a few instances when I excused myself from an issue, and went my own way, but not very often.

As for this thread,  I have, on a few occasions been the "Cart Girl Schmoozer" . I use to golf at this one course in Vegas, and they had young beverage cart girl who was nothing short of drop dead gorgeous. Just about every group I might be playing with, especially when playing with folks I did not know, usually visitors to town, would hit on her. I kind of took this on the side of being jealous. She was a looker. As the other golfers would try and work their charm on her, I would just walk up, and hand her my business card. I would tell he that I needed a personal secretary, that the job paid $45K a year, with full benefits, a yearly bonus, business trips, and included with a company car of her choice. She would take my card, and after a gush, or two would say she would have to talk to her Mom, that if the offer was on the level, "THEY" would call me. This would stop the other guys in our group dead in their tracks. We did this several times when she was working.

After we had left the young lady, usually on the next tee box she would be the topic of discussion. Usually the discussion would lean to the sleazy side of things. That's when I would tell them she was my youngest daughter.......

So, many of the golfers bought hundreds of dollars of booze they don't intend to drink? I often wondered why some of my playing partners have dozens of the little bottles in their bags. . .

Boy is this thread calling your name: http://thesandtrap.com/t/80885/golfdigest-editor-goes-undercover-as-a-cart-girl

No, the parents called him. . .

[SafeBogey]

How about the Allergic to Walking Guy? This guy will top the ball 15 feet, get in his cart, drive up to the ball, get out of the cart, top it 15 feet again, get in the cart, drive up to the ball, etc, all the way up the fairway.

I've had the misfortune of playing with several of these individuals in the past.

[RFKFREAK]

No, the parents called him. . .

Well, I meant I'd be interested to see what his thoughts on that subject would be in that thread rather than taking this one

[Lihu]

How about the Allergic to Walking Guy? This guy will top the ball 15 feet, get in his cart, drive up to the ball, get out of the cart, top it 15 feet again, get in the cart, drive up to the ball, etc, all the way up the fairway.

I've had the misfortune of playing with several of these individuals in the past.

Just saw this yesterday evening with the party in front of us.

[imsys0042]

Better to be that rather than. . . I'm the "I can guess how far it is without a rangefinder" guy. "The stakes say it's about 150 yards, 200 yards or whatever", "Oh yeah, it was 200 yards away. Oops, wrong club but it reached by hitting the cart path. . .". :-D

Ha Ha. I'm like that. I don't like range finders, but really only because people take them too far. My home course has GPS plus yard ages on sprinkler heads plus I've been playing there 5 years and know how far away I am to the center of the green (and carry distances) from almost everywhere. I also know the width and depths of the greens so I can quickly calculate how far I need to hit the ball. I'm rarely off by more than 3 yards. Of course a lot of the time its figuring out what the GPS says and then adjusting for where someone else is on the fairway. I frequently joke that people should save their money and just ask me. I'm not obnoxious about it, no reason to. But a little knowledge goes a long way to not needing one.

[Scotsclaff]

How about the Allergic to Walking Guy? This guy will top the ball 15 feet, get in his cart, drive up to the ball, get out of the cart, top it 15 feet again, get in the cart, drive up to the ball, etc, all the way up the fairway.

I've had the misfortune of playing with several of these individuals in the past.

A bad habit but I am a fully paid up member of this allergy.

[SavvySwede]

Put me down for rangefinder guy. It is just a compulsion with me, even when I'm playing a par 3 that I've played a hundred times and know how far it is I just can't help giving it a quick shot with the Bushnell.

A few more to add to the list "The guy who always needs to borrow a tee or ball marker" "The guy who takes too many practice swings" "The guy who always wants to play from the Tips when he shouldn't" "The guy who parks his cart in front of the green"

[JonMA1]

How about the Allergic to Walking Guy? This guy will top the ball 15 feet, get in his cart, drive up to the ball, get out of the cart, top it 15 feet again, get in the cart, drive up to the ball, etc, all the way up the fairway.

I've had the misfortune of playing with several of these individuals in the past.

I've only had two partners that I'd classify as annoying, and one who took this to a new level.

I finished a round with this guy one week and he asked if I'd be interested in playing the following week. The guy seemed perfectly normal so we exchanged phone numbers (which my wife of course referred to as the start of a blossoming bro-mance). So the next week we met up at the club where he insisted I drive the cart (I prefer to walk but agreed to get a cart at his request). He then started to get agitated if I didn't drive exactly right or stop the cart in exactly the right spot in the fairway (told me he couldn't make a swing if the cart wasn't in his line of sight). At one point I asked him if he wanted to drive the cart which he declined.

This came to a boiling point on the last hole when I stopped the cart within 10 yards of where our tee shots landed. When he got to his ball, he decided he needed a different club and instead of walking back to the cart, angrily gestured for me to drive over at which I replied "are you $%#ing kidding me?!!". We shook hands after we sank our last putts and I never heard from him again.

The other annoying partner insisted on teaching me everything there was to know about how to play a round of golf.

[Bird E3]

I have to admit, I'm the Rangefinder guy :)

Haha me too, and I don't think its that bad at all. I couldn't play without it. I think it speeds up play. I am the wanna be tour pro guy though. I don't have a tour bag, but I love having pretty clubs, and good looking cloths.

[Harp stein]

I once played with a guy that brought a boombox on his cart and blasted music the entire round, that was really annoying.

I'm "rangefinder guy" with my phone GPS, sometimes wonder if that annoys people.

[gatsby47]

Very tolerant of most. Hate people who sulk about bad shots for more than 10 sec.  But the one that is most annoying to me is the self professed gorilla golfer who wants you to know he hit something with his super duper titanium boron kryptonite 7 iron an amazing 198 yds.  Big fecking  deal is my response. He has all the accessories, all the latest.  Nothing better than beating someone with wedges, feathered and full shot hybrids, and 180yd drives.

[dkolo]

I once played with a guy that brought a boombox on his cart and blasted music the entire round, that was really annoying. I'm "rangefinder guy" with my phone GPS, sometimes wonder if that annoys people.

I once played with two young dudes my age who had a Jambox in their cart playing Sinatra style music the whole round. It was awesome.

[isukgolf]

I hate the guys that will not shut up in the tee box ... had guy that played in our group some. I'd go to the next tee box with my driver in hand so I jump out and hit before him (we play ready golf) ... once he hits all talks about his drive ... where did it land, man I hit that one good, or I did this or that ... he just will not STFU!!! Jabbers while the next players hit.

[JP golf]

Wow!  I didn't realize I was this bad!!!!   A celebrating, beer drinking, focused on my game (at the expense of forgetting where you hit yours even though I watched it), optimistic daredevil with a rangefinder.... that sometimes hits on the cart girl... lol..

The Frat Boy (depends on the format and who I'm playing with... and always in Myrtle Beach lol)

Defining characteristics: Unable to fathom a round of golf without a steady stream of adult beverages. Idea of restraint is to hold off drinking ... until the second hole. Favorite expression: "A few beers will loosen up that swing!"

Oblivious Guy

Defining characteristics: So preoccupied with his own game never looks for anyone else's ball. When driving a cart, always blows past your ball and heads directly to his. Favorite expression: "But enough about me. What do YOU think of my swing?"

Delusional Guy

Defining characteristics: Forces group to wait on every par 5 because he's convinced he can get home in two. Usually gets there in four. Favorite expression: "If I really catch it, I can get there."

The Overcelebrater

Defining characteristics: Treats every holed three footer as if just won the Masters. Has sent multiple playing partners home early thanks to overzealous chest bumping. Favorite expression: "Yes SIR!"

The Cart Daredevil - (I'm the worst driver of a cart - partly because I will watch you hit your shot, then forget where it went by the time we start driving!)

Defining characteristics: Reverts to his inner 13-year-old as soon as he gets behind the wheel of a cart. Has never met a "Cart Path Only" sign that pertains to him. Favorite expression: "Man, if only this thing didn't have a governor!"

Rangefinder Guy - (This is me if I had to pick one - bad thing is I'm always in panic mode hoping I have good batteries!)

Defining characteristics: Overly reliant on his yardage device, to the extent that he can't fathom anyone navigating a course without it. Favorite expression: "Wait! I'll give you the exact number."

[Ferguson]

Former Foundry Worker Guy This is the golfer that speaks openly in support of all blue collar workers. From the introduction to shaking hands on 18, the conversation encompasses how no one understands what real work is until you’ve worked 25 years in a foundry, steel manufacturing facility or smelting plant. And his playing partner supports his propaganda 100%. He pulls you to the side and says, “he worked in a foundry for 25 years – that place was as hot as hell.” He speaks about why computers make no sense, and how women shouldn’t be able to vote and how he doesn’t like THE EMAIL. He reminds you that “without steel” no one would have jobs, this country would still be on horseback. My turn to putt?

[Lihu]

Former Foundry Worker Guy This is the golfer that speaks openly in support of all blue collar workers. From the introduction to shaking hands on 18, the conversation encompasses how no one understands what real work is until you’ve worked 25 years in a foundry, steel manufacturing facility or smelting plant. And his playing partner supports his propaganda 100%. He pulls you to the side and says, “he worked in a foundry for 25 years – that place was as hot as hell.” He speaks about why computers make no sense, and how women shouldn’t be able to vote and how he doesn’t like THE EMAIL. He reminds you that “without steel” no one would have jobs, this country would still be on horseback. My turn to putt?

Just a wild guess that you played a round recently with said type? :-D

[mtthwdrn]

I'm the air counter guy. I'm getting better but I still have to once in a while. Usually after a brutal hole. I can get done in the walk from pin to bag. Favorite expression, "One, two, ob, four, five, six, dammit." This is usually on the range but, how about starts digging through your bag without asking guy. Makes comments about how he only hits brand X because that's what serious players hit. Wants to see how the other half live by hitting your clubs. And of course they are not as good. Favorite expression, "Can I hit your pitching wedge?"

[Ferguson]

The Medical Condition Guy It starts with a discussion regarding the fluid buildup in his lower back when putting the first green. The second hole features a brief insight into the guy’s struggle with skin rashes. Holes 3 thru 5 cover the topics of nerve damage, infected toenails and slippage of the kneecaps. As you make the turn, the conversation goes to the digestive system and delves into a dialogue about the untreatable partial blockage of his sigmoid colon. Holes 12 thru 15 cover all of his 14 operations including the removal of his left testicle that as a youth was undescended but never treated. Hole 16 covers the collapsed lung in 1986, while holes 17 and 18 wrap up the round with a narrative on prostatitis and the removal of a cyst in his neck.