Get Used to Playing With Golfers Who Get on Your Nerves, or Not?

[JuliWooli]

I have a select group who I will happily play with but unfortunately for tournament play I don't have that choice. 

I don't consider myself over fussy but slow play and bad etiquette really get on my nerves. Unfortunately our small club likes to mix the handicaps in too many tournaments for my liking and I have to play too often with golfers I would normally not/never play with. 

For a while, I thought this was just part of the game and bit bullet and went through many miserable rounds. However, my skill levels and enjoyment of the game suffered.

I now only play in tournaments where the groups are sent out related to handicap but that leaves me playing in a fraction of the tournament calendar.

Am I alone?

[colin007]

Just so I understand correctly - do you feel there's a correlation between a player's handicap and their slow play/lack of etiquette?

[bkuehn1952]

1 hour ago, JuliWooli said:

... I don't consider myself over fussy but slow play and bad etiquette really get on my nerves. Unfortunately our small club likes to mix the handicaps in too many tournaments for my liking and I have to play too often with golfers I would normally not/never play with...

Am I alone?

In tournament play, I always just accept what I get.  Typically, anyone playing in a tournament in the USA has a decent understanding of golf etiquette.  Those that don't are politely corrected.  Pace of play can sometimes be an issue no matter the skill level.  Unless a player's pace places the group in danger of a penalty, I just accept it.

My experience has been that 98% of the players with whom I an grouped are a nice collection of people.  Fortunately, the 2% can be mostly avoided or ignored during the round.

So yes, you are alone, at least in my personal experience.

[JuliWooli]

38 minutes ago, colin007 said:

Just so I understand correctly - do you feel there's a correlation between a player's handicap and their slow play/lack of etiquette?

Yes and no. We always walk the course here (no buggies) and the higher handicappers have often less understanding of where to position themselves in between shots. Be that tee, fairway or green. There are of course exceptions and low handicappers can also be a little lack lustre. As a rule the better the player, the better is his/her understanding of etiquette.

My pet hate is when I boom a long draw into the rough and they compliment the shot.

"f*** off!"

[mcanadiens]

The golf course is no different than any other walk of life. You'll occasionally run into disagreeable people. 

My old association had a bunch of different events. Some were flighted and some (scrambles and the like) were not. Over the few years I played there were a couple of disagreeable rounds with a couple of individuals. One was a fellow high-cap player and the other was a single-digit. As it turned out, one of those guys must have been having a bad day. We played together after that and actually grew to like each other despite the bad start. 

Perhaps you've had bad luck.  Maybe you are just expecting something out of your club members that isn't realistic.

 

[ChetlovesMer]

2 hours ago, JuliWooli said:

I have a select group who I will happily play with but unfortunately for tournament play I don't have that choice. 

I don't consider myself over fussy but slow play and bad etiquette really get on my nerves. Unfortunately our small club likes to mix the handicaps in too many tournaments for my liking and I have to play too often with golfers I would normally not/never play with. 

For a while, I thought this was just part of the game and bit bullet and went through many miserable rounds. However, my skill levels and enjoyment of the game suffered.

I now only play in tournaments where the groups are sent out related to handicap but that leaves me playing in a fraction of the tournament calendar.

Am I alone?

I guess I am the opposite of you. I am excessively tolerant of whom ever I get paired up with. 

In my getting over 25 years of playing golf I've only once ever had a problem with anyone I've played with. I once shared a cart with a guy who literally smoked 2 cigarettes' per hole. I normally don't have a problem with folks smoking around me. However, in this case I started getting a fierce headache around hole number 12 or 13. 

Otherwise I really enjoy meeting new people and I find that I can enjoy conversations with almost everyone. 

3 minutes ago, JuliWooli said:

My pet hate is when I boom a long draw into the rough and they compliment the shot.

"f*** off!"

Oh, hmm......... You probably shouldn't play with me. 
If the drive is long and findable I'd compliment it. Just because it's in the rough I would still deem it worthy of a "Nice shot." , or a "That will work." etc... 

If it goes into really deep rough, I might say "Oh, that's unlucky." 

[JuliWooli]

29 minutes ago, bkuehn1952 said:

In tournament play, I always just accept what I get.  Typically, anyone playing in a tournament in the USA has a decent understanding of golf etiquette.  Those that don't are politely corrected.  .

Yeah, but I never settle after correcting them. I think I have been missing out the polite bit.

If I'm putting and they move during my routine I'll say,

"Where the f*** are you going?"

Instead of,

"I realise you have finished this hole and you would like to move on to the next tee but could you please wait another couple of seconds until I have a go at this 5' birdie. Thank you very much for your patience. Can I reset?"

Better?

[JuliWooli]

9 minutes ago, mcanadiens said:

The golf course is no different than any other walk of life. You'll occasionally run into disagreeable people. 

Perhaps you've had bad luck.  Maybe you are just expecting something out of your club members that isn't realistic.

 

I did see it as my own problem, not being able to tolerate such interferences. I was determined to beat it but gave up because they were spoiling the enjoyment for me. But life is too short. I failed and I am the loser as I play in much fewer tournaments.

BTW, I have had better experiences when I use Gallwey's/Shoemaker's pre-round chat on the first tee. It goes something like this,

"What a lovely day we've got. I hope you have a fun round with me. I am feeling a pretty nervous but I hope to conquer that and join you in a wonderful round. Have fun!"

Hey, I've not used that chat for a long time. Perhaps I've been missing a trick.

21 minutes ago, ChetlovesMer said:

If it goes into really deep rough, I might say "Oh, that's unlucky." 

Don't!

I would however probably play with you. You sound like a nice guy.

Tell me you don't say things like,

"You seem to knock 4 footers in with ease."

Just as I am walking up to attempt one.

Don't!

 

 

[ChetlovesMer]

9 minutes ago, JuliWooli said:

You sound like a nice guy.

I am. 

[JuliWooli]

1 minute ago, ChetlovesMer said:

I am. 

Can anyone confirm this claim?

[ChetlovesMer]

2 minutes ago, JuliWooli said:

Can anyone confirm this claim?

Hmm.... that's a tough one. ... 

[JuliWooli]

3 minutes ago, ChetlovesMer said:

Hmm.... that's a tough one. ... 

Not a single confirmation. I'm blocking you. How do I set that up.

[dennyjones]

How can you block a guy that uses the handle @ChetlovesMer?   I'll vouch for him just based upon his handle.

[JuliWooli]

4 minutes ago, dennyjones said:

How can you block a guy that uses the handle @ChetlovesMer?   I'll vouch for him just based upon his handle.

I think that's the most desperate plea I've ever heard, I'm blocking both of you.

[CarlSpackler]

You have those people who try to get under your skin to get you to fall apart. You can choose your reaction to others behaviors.

17 minutes ago, JuliWooli said:

I think that's the most desperate plea I've ever heard, I'm blocking both of you.

Best idea EVER!!! 🤣

[JuliWooli]

7 minutes ago, CarlSpackler said:

You have those people who try to get under your skin to get you to fall apart. You can choose your reaction to others behaviors.

Best idea EVER!!! 🤣

A couple of wankers!

[Club Rat]

Tough Crowd this morning, Where's the LUV

I used to play in Local Competitive Events and assumed I would be paired with players of same ability.
Unfortunately not the case, the organization pairs two low caps with two high caps.

After two events, I quit the summer long events.
A. The first event, I played well but started out with a triple on a long tough par 3.
Not knowing the course, I re-teed not knowing I could have taken a drop where my ball crossed the penalty area.
I replayed from the tee thinking my ball was lost.
This all occurred after riding out to our hole #8 which were were to start on.
The guy driving the cart, unknown to me was clueless.
He drove completely around the course at break neck speed in an old cart with bad suspension.
When we finally arrived, I got out and had to stretch and looked back towards the club house.
It could have been a short drive down hole #9 and avoid the scenic route.
The rest of the round went well as I often simply walked after tee shots to the green.

B. This was the worst event I ever played in.
For starters, we wait for one player who is late.
He immediately runs up to the white tees and hits his shot. 
The guy who I'm riding with have waited to tee off, and the other two idiots drive off.
They sit in the middle of the fairway clueless as we yell at them to move over.
After several attempts, they finally wake up and realize we are waiting to hit.
The guy proceeds to top his tee shot. The the process of waiting starts again as the other two idiots
drive back out to the fairway.
15 minutes later, I finally play my approach.
We finish the hole and drive to the next tee and unbelievably have to wait.  
It was the longest day of golf I have ever had.
I can pretty close to quitting at the turn, but since this was an out of town event, I stayed.

That was the last event I played with that organization.

So to sum it up, I don't mind mixed handicap events, but prefer to play with players of the same ability in competition. 

[ChetlovesMer]

7 minutes ago, Club Rat said:

That was the last event I played with that organization.

So to sum it up, I don't mind mixed handicap events, but prefer to play with players of the same ability in competition. 

It has been my experience that more often than not, if an event sucks it's due to the organizers rather than the players. 

I hope you get to see this response as I've heard that I've been blocked.