I am the worst collegiate golfer in America

[nevets88]

Inside look at a casual golfer just out of HS who decides to join a DIII team. Was hoping to get more insidery details and logistics, but the overall vein of the piece is a burgeoning love of golf sparked from an impulse decision. Not sure what Mangoprism is, there's not much info - looks like an aggregation of mid length form essays of experiences from all facets of life.

Quote

I filled out the NCAA paperwork pledging to avoid steroids, and so assumed my place among a long and dignified line of Garfield High School student-athletes — Tony Wroten, Isaiah Stanback, Brandon Roy – who have represented The Town at the NCAA level. This fall, I would take my talents to Walla Walla.

—–

The first tee in a golf tournament is occasion for much pomp and fanfare. They announce your name – from Whitman College… Andrew Schwartz! – and the tepid claps of your supporters pepper the hollow air, and you are alone on the tee box, and you take stride behind your ball with a firm clasp on your driver, the most masculine of athletic appendages. 

 

http://mangoprism.com/2015/12/30/i-am-the-worst-collegiate-golfer-in-america/

[SavvySwede]

He's maybe the worst writer to boot. I had to quit after two minutes. Dude is trying way too hard.

[iacas]

17 minutes ago, nevets88 said:

http://mangoprism.com/2015/12/30/i-am-the-worst-collegiate-golfer-in-america/

The title is "I AM THE WORST COLLEGIATE GOLFER IN AMERICA".

Quote

The next day, I played with a man who kept angrily referring to himself as “a faggot.” Like he would hit a mediocre but honestly probably okay shot, and yell out something like “you fucking faggot” (again, to himself) and bang his club on the ground. He misread a putt and proclaimed that “that slope is so stupid,” and “this green is so gay” and then picked his ball out of the hole and threw it into the lake. He made six on that hole and I, through a series of misfortunes, shot a twelve. I finished with a 116 on this day. “An improvement!” said Coach McClure

No, he's not. In fact, I don't even have to leave my own conference to prove him wrong on that…

http://psblions.com/sports/golf/2014-15/files/AMCC_Golf_Championship_Day_2_Individuals.pdf

[saevel25]

161 and a follow up 157 

[Gboroman]

Article has potential, but the writing style is way superfluous.

[mchepp]

1 minute ago, saevel25 said:

161 and a follow up 157 

Quite consistent for so many shots. 

[SavvySwede]

4 minutes ago, saevel25 said:

161 and a follow up 157 

His strategy must be to get his opponents to quit. I know I'd give up and go home before he was through.

[Mr. Desmond]

37 minutes ago, SavvySwede said:

He's maybe the worst writer to boot. I had to quit after two minutes. Dude is trying way too hard.

Concur - 

“this green is so gay” - He must have played with my son about 5 years ago.

Edited December 31, 2015 by Mr. Desmond

[dak4n6]

Quote

Woe and naught, this rank I here posit with neither pride nor melancholy nor mirth; rather these are social coordinates on which to ruminate in a dreadful isolation, on which to lie oneself prone, ebb into the continuum, that perhaps a sort of panoptic clarity may yet emerge.

Five gold stars to anyone who can tell us WTF this sentence means. I quit immediately after reading this.. 

[billchao]

9 minutes ago, dak4n6 said:

Five gold stars to anyone who can tell us WTF this sentence means. I quit immediately after reading this.. 

Dude needs to read more Faulkner. He's doing it wrong.

[dak4n6]

Just now, billchao said:

Dude needs to read more Faulkner. He's doing it wrong.

Haha! I remember reading The Sound and Fury on the advice of my college roomate (who also thought he was a writer), and pretty much going ??? the whole time. I did make it through the entire book though. I think there were like 4 periods in all 300 pages.

I much preferred As I Lay Dying...

[billchao]

23 minutes ago, dak4n6 said:

Haha! I remember reading The Sound and Fury on the advice of my college roomate (who also thought he was a writer), and pretty much going ??? the whole time. I did make it through the entire book though. I think there were like 4 periods in all 300 pages.

I much preferred As I Lay Dying...

I read mostly his short stories. I liked "A Rose for Emily". Loved the way he wrote and have tried unsuccessfully in the past to emulate it. Our young writer here has similarly failed.

[Pendragon]

1 hour ago, nevets88 said:

Inside look at a casual golfer just out of HS who decides to join a DIII team. Was hoping to get more insidery details and logistics, but the overall vein of the piece is a burgeoning love of golf sparked from an impulse decision. Not sure what Mangoprism is, there's not much info - looks like an aggregation of mid length form essays of experiences from all facets of life.

 

http://mangoprism.com/2015/12/30/i-am-the-worst-collegiate-golfer-in-america/

How interesting! This is actually pretty sad. If a college has no players who can break 100, why do they have a golf team? And this kid sounds like he's pretty proud of himself. Wow.

[iacas]

2 minutes ago, Pendragon said:

How interesting! This is actually pretty sad. If a college has no players who can break 100, why do they have a golf team? And this kid sounds like he's pretty proud of himself. Wow.

Because it's a college sport, and an activity for the students. It's not always about being competitive. If it were, there would be no teams for the good teams to play against.

[DrvFrShow]

I thought his attempt to channel Faulkner was typical of a college student. I probably would have chosen Hemingway. 

Imagine my surprise when I found out that some of the Div III college players working at the golf course in the summer were no better than I am. They're also competing against comparable teams. They may have one player who shoots in the low 80s. 

Div I is another story altogether.

[caniac6]

161 first round,157 next round? Sandbagger!

[Gator Hazard]

Wait. Did I read correctly that my 115-120 scores are better than the collegiate golfer?? I need to not be so hard on myself. ?

[dak4n6]

On 12/31/2015 at 10:31 AM, billchao said:

I read mostly his short stories. I liked "A Rose for Emily". Loved the way he wrote and have tried unsuccessfully in the past to emulate it. Our young writer here has similarly failed.

billy, and forgive me if I have too easily adopted the familiar diminutive of your name, but I loved 'Waiting for Godot'. One of the absurdist classics. I think I was the only one in my HS AP English class who 'got it'.