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Who Can Write the Best Miguel Angel Jimenez "Most Interesting Man in Golf" One-Liner?

jamo

By jamo
in Tour Talk

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Note: This thread is 4154 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic. Thank you!

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jamo Incredible Member

jamo

Posted
Posted
I'm filling in this week on [URL=http://thesandtrap.com/b/hittin_the_links]Hittin' The Links[/URL], and one of the links I came across was a video from Ping about Miguel Angel Jimenez's crazy stretching routine, called, appropriately, "The Most Interesting Stretching Routine in the World." [VIDEO]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yBdlGz79iCU[/VIDEO] That got me thinking, what would it be like to write a bunch of one-liners in the style of the Dos Equis "The Most Interesting Man in the World" commercials, but golf-themed? So I wrote a bunch. Most are staggeringly, frighteningly awful (I'll post even the worst ones at some point if the thread takes off), and I'm sure you guys can come up with better ones. If you need a refresher on the joke structure, a quick Google search yielded this: http://www.livin3.com/blogs/positive-life-blog/8486777-100-most-interesting-man-in-the-world-quotes Most of them are common cliches that have been reworked. I'd recommend writing down every single one that comes to your mind, no matter how awful you think they are. Then post them. (Maybe point to the ones you think are the best.) In the end, I'll pick a winner. All I can offer at this time is a rep point, but since I'm a moderator, mine are worth extra! :-D Here are a few of mine, for example: For him, only 30% of his putts left short don’t go in. He is “da man.” All of his bounces are members' bounces. He drives and putts for dough. Go for it!

In my bag:

Driver: Titleist TSi3 | 15º 3-Wood: Ping G410 | 17º 2-Hybrid: Ping G410 | 19º 3-Iron: TaylorMade GAPR Lo |4-PW Irons: Nike VR Pro Combo | 54º SW, 60º LW: Titleist Vokey SM8 | Putter: Odyssey Toulon Las Vegas H7

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Ernest Jones
Ernest Jones

I don't always bring a bottle of wine to the range, but when I don't I bring two. Stay thirsty my friends.

David in FL
David in FL

The cart girl tips him for buying a beer.....

dave s
dave s

His topped drive rolled 25 yards past your bomb Miguel always has honors.  Even if you DID win the previous hole His playing partners are ALWAYS away regardless of where a ball lies

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iacas Hall of Fame Member

iacas

Posted
  • Administrator
Posted

Even when you "nice" him, his putts drop.

When he makes a hole in one, the rest of the players at the course buy him a drink.

He's never between clubs.

I'll leave the good ones for other people. ;)

Erik J. Barzeski — ⛳ I knock a ball. It goes in a gopher hole. 🏌🏼‍♂️
Director of Instruction Golf Evolution • Owner, The Sand Trap .com • Author, Lowest Score Wins
Golf Digest "Best Young Teachers in America" 2016-17 & "Best in State" 2017-20 • WNY Section PGA Teacher of the Year 2019 :edel: :true_linkswear:

Check Out: New Topics | TST Blog | Golf Terms | Instructional Content | Analyzr | LSW | Instructional Droplets

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Mr. Desmond Super Member

Mr. Desmond

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Posted

I don't usually fart when stretching, but when I do, people think it's my cologne

  • Upvote 1

Ping G400 Max 9/TPT Shaft, TEE EX10 Beta 4, 5 wd, PXG 22 HY, Mizuno JPX919F 5-GW, TItleist SM7 Raw 55-09, 59-11, Bettinardi BB39

 

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nevets88 Incredible Member

nevets88

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When MAJ goes to sleep, he doesn't count golf holes. Golf holes count him.

Steve

Kill slow play. Allow walking. Reduce ineffective golf instruction. Use environmentally friendly course maintenance.

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Stretch Super Member

Stretch

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Posted

There is an entire district in Rioja reserved for his personal consumption. His cigars are rolled between the thighs of virgin Korean LPGA players. The king of Spain calls him "Jefe", and gets eight a side.

PS: The original stretching video, with the Peter Alliss commentary, must be regarded as the ur-text!

Stretch.

"In the process of trial and error, our failed attempts are meant to destroy arrogance and provoke humility." -- Master Jin Kwon

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Ernest Jones Incredible Member

Ernest Jones

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Posted
I don't always bring a bottle of wine to the range, but when I don't I bring two. Stay thirsty my friends.
  • Upvote 2

Yours in earnest, Jason.
Call me Ernest, or EJ or Ernie.

PSA - "If you find yourself in a hole, STOP DIGGING!"

My Whackin' Sticks: :cleveland: 330cc 2003 Launcher 10.5*  :tmade: RBZ HL 3w  :nickent: 3DX DC 3H, 3DX RC 4H  :callaway: X-22 5-AW  :nike:SV tour 56* SW :mizuno: MP-T11 60* LW :bridgestone: customized TD-03 putter :tmade:Penta TP3   :aimpoint:

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RandallT Super Member

RandallT

Posted
Posted
The Laws of Ball Flight adapt to how he wants them to behave on any given shot

My Swing

Driver: :ping: G30, Irons: :tmade: Burner 2.0, Putter: :cleveland:, Balls: :snell:

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LuciusWooding Great Member

LuciusWooding

Posted
Posted

The only time he ever lost a match was when he dropped it trying to light his cigar.

When he hits into the trees, the trees are in trouble.

Rickie Fowler gives 18 footers to him.

  • Upvote 1

In My Bag:

Adams Super LS 9.5˚ driver, Aldila Phenom NL 65TX
Adams Super LS 15˚ fairway, Kusala black 72x
Adams Super LS 18˚ fairway, Aldila Rip'd NV 75TX
Adams Idea pro VST hybrid, 21˚, RIP Alpha 105x
Adams DHY 24˚, RIP Alpha 89x
5-PW Maltby TE irons, KBS C taper X, soft stepped once 130g
Mizuno T4, 54.9 KBS Wedge X
Mizuno R12 60.5, black nickel, KBS Wedge X
Odyssey Metal X #1 putter 
Bridgestone E5, Adidas samba bag, True Linkswear Stealth
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RandallT Super Member

RandallT

Posted
Posted
Rickie Fowler gives 18 footers to him.

Hilarious. Nicely done. These remind me of Chuck Norris jokes so I checked if there were golf-specific ones: http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/taxonomy/term/630

My Swing

Driver: :ping: G30, Irons: :tmade: Burner 2.0, Putter: :cleveland:, Balls: :snell:

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David in FL Incredible Member

David in FL

Posted
Posted
The cart girl tips him for buying a beer.....
  • Upvote 2

In David's bag....

Driver: Titleist 910 D-3;  9.5* Diamana Kai'li
3-Wood: Titleist 910F;  15* Diamana Kai'li
Hybrids: Titleist 910H 19* and 21* Diamana Kai'li
Irons: Titleist 695cb 5-Pw
Wedges: Scratch 51-11 TNC grind, Vokey SM-5's;  56-14 F grind and 60-11 K grind
Putter: Scotty Cameron Kombi S
Ball: ProV1

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Mr. Desmond Super Member

Mr. Desmond

Posted
Posted

The cart girl tips him for buying a beer.....

Like it.

Ping G400 Max 9/TPT Shaft, TEE EX10 Beta 4, 5 wd, PXG 22 HY, Mizuno JPX919F 5-GW, TItleist SM7 Raw 55-09, 59-11, Bettinardi BB39

 

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mchepp Great Member

mchepp

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His divots go farther than your shots

He once on a par 3 hit one out of bounds just so he could make par the hard way

Even his shanks go straight

  • Upvote 1

Michael

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Ernest Jones Incredible Member

Ernest Jones

Posted
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The cart girl tips him for buying a beer.....

NICE!!!!

Yours in earnest, Jason.
Call me Ernest, or EJ or Ernie.

PSA - "If you find yourself in a hole, STOP DIGGING!"

My Whackin' Sticks: :cleveland: 330cc 2003 Launcher 10.5*  :tmade: RBZ HL 3w  :nickent: 3DX DC 3H, 3DX RC 4H  :callaway: X-22 5-AW  :nike:SV tour 56* SW :mizuno: MP-T11 60* LW :bridgestone: customized TD-03 putter :tmade:Penta TP3   :aimpoint:

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dave s Great Member

dave s

Posted
Posted

His topped drive rolled 25 yards past your bomb

Miguel always has honors.  Even if you DID win the previous hole

His playing partners are ALWAYS away regardless of where a ball lies

He always plays it where it lies.  Even from a water hazard

He once sliced a ball off the planet just to experience a lost ball

The closest he's been to a water hazard is a ball washer

Miguel has never taken a penalty stroke, but levied many

He IS, the most interesting golfer alive.

dave

  • Upvote 2

The ultimate "old man" setup:

Ping G30 driver
Ping G Fairway woods - 5 and 7 woods
Callaway X-Hot #5 hybrid; Old school secret weapon
Ping G #6-9 irons; W and U wedges
Vokey 54 and 58* Wedges
Odyssey Versa Putter
Golf Balls

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MacDutch Great Member

MacDutch

Posted
Posted
Miguel is Antoni Gaudi in disguise, his bunkershots are on the UNESCO World Heritage list. Miguel's bunkershots are close AND a sigar. Miguel is not given the honour, he is the honour.
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Note: This thread is 4154 days old. We appreciate that you found this thread instead of starting a new one, but if you plan to post here please make sure it's still relevant. If not, please start a new topic. Thank you!

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