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Nature calls, on the Course

Poll Results: Nature calls and #1 is in order with no bathroom in sight, what do you do?

  • 47% (51)
    Just give me a tree.
  • 28% (30)
    Deep in the woods.
  • 0% (0)
    Go looking for balls in a pond.
  • 16% (18)
    Wait for for the next outhouse or at the turn.
  • 3% (4)
    Just go man, just go!
  • 3% (4)
    Tee box is fine.
107 Total Votes  
post #1 of 74
Thread Starter 

How do you roll?

post #2 of 74

If I'm on a fairly secluded course (without many houses along the course) I'll just head into a woodsy area and take care of business discretely.  If there are no woods, and no privacy, I'll just try to hold it until there is a facility.

post #3 of 74

Will be interesting if anyone says "tee box is fine".

post #4 of 74
Originally Posted by rowlf View Post

Will be interesting if anyone says "tee box is fine".

I've played with a couple guys that would say that.  They just would turn away from us and let it fly.  There was nobody around, but it'd be nice if they would have used a little discretion

post #5 of 74

If it is at all feasible, I'll wait for the clubhouse or an outhouse.  But golf is hard enough without that pressure.  Sometimes gotta find some woods.

post #6 of 74

I am the only one that voted to "wait for an outhouse or the turn" so far as that is always my first option. If they're locked or have some type of woodstock line of people outside of them, I will damn sure be adding balls to the woods if you know what I mean.

post #7 of 74

I answered the tree but that would be with an asterisk.


There are never more than a handful of people on the course I usually play and no women unless my wife is with me, and she does the same thing (but more often). Plus the entire course is surrounded by hunting land with no houses. The two bathrooms on the course haven't been open in two years.


When I go to another course with civilization around I wait until I see a bathroom unless there happens to be some secluded woods before I get to one.

post #8 of 74

Home course has porta-potties, classy. They are conviently located between the 2 green and 7 tee so we see it twice on the front. There's two on the back at 14 and 17 so plenty of opportunity. But it's a rural course that can be totally empty at times so not much chance of being seen if you have a #1 emergency. Can't say I've ever heard of someone dropping a deuce on the fly.

post #9 of 74

I've always been a tree guy. I fully support our club's decision to get rid of most of the trees (especially the pines that were planted in the 60's and 70's) in an attempt to restore the course to what was built over 100 years ago. But it sure has made it hard to find a place to pee.

post #10 of 74

I voted deep in the woods. If you gotta go, you gotta go; no time to wait for a bathroom to appear.

post #11 of 74

If you HAVE to go, so be it, but I'm gonna wait for a bathroom.....

post #12 of 74

Not necessarily deep in the woods, but at least some bushes for a little decorum.....


One of our local courses was actually telling golfers to be a little careful on one hole.  Apparently a homeowner with a little too much time on his hands had taken to calling the police if he saw someone heeding the call.  Now, how they'd prove who it was, or what they were actually doing, I don't know, but in this day and age of cell phone video cams.....   b1_ohmy.gif

post #13 of 74
I played with a guy last weekend that was drinking the entire time (he must have drank a 12 pack over the 4 hour round...). On hole #16, we were waiting for another guy to hit and the drinker literally just unzipped and peed right in the middle of the fairway with us close by. I was shocked!

Personally, I wait for the next woodsy area.
post #14 of 74
Maybe not deep in the woods, but I'll look for some cover.
post #15 of 74

I wait for an outhouse or the clubhouse at the turn.  However, it's pretty rare that I actually have to go on the course.  I don't drink much while I play and I go beforehand, so I'm usually fine.  Once I get a little older and start having Terry Bradshaw's problems then things will change.


I certainly have no problem with people using the nearest tree and if I happened to have an emergency, then I wouldn't hesitate either.


Side note:  The last two weeks at my son's little 3-7 year old beginner class he has had to go.  And when he's having fun, he frequently doesn't realize it until it is coming, so rather than run across the entire range to the port a potty risking an accident, we grabbed the nearest tree. :)

post #16 of 74

Clubhouse or restroom.  You guys who say that you can't wait, may need to see a urologist.  I'm 66 and I have old man's disease, that is prostrate pressing on the bladder, but I can still wait for a proper proper receptacle for my waste.  I find it disgusting that guys will just whip it out in full view and let loose.  Think about who may have been there ahead of you the next time you crawl into a bush to retrieve your ball. z4_blink.gif

post #17 of 74

You people are a bunch of animals - I do tend to drink a bit heavily when golfing and the only acceptable answer I see is the rest rooms.

post #18 of 74

Okay, I voted "Just give me a tree."  When you gotta go, you gotta go, but I seldom get into that state because I make a point of not letting good opportunities go by unexploited.  I think it is another sort of 'course management.' 

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