Getting on the course as a friendless beginner

[RussUK]

When I started playing golf I was in the same situation. I was really afraid of playing with strangers. My view is that strangers don't care how bad you play golf as long as you don't slow them down. So when I got into a situation I couldn't get out of, such as getting out of a difficult bunker, or carrying  a large body of water, I simply picked up my ball and threw it by hand onto the fairway and continue playing from there so I could keep up with the group.

Also, keep yor practice swings to a minimum to save time.

Just my opinion.

+1 on this.Thats what i did when i started. Still do it now if im playing solo and not keeping score. I think beginners just need to forget about what others are thinking/saying and just play. 9 times out of 10 the other guys on the course couldnt give a monkey's about someone being a beginner. If they do, be polite about it and all's good

[Osnola]

I am uncomfortable when forced to play with others that I do not know. I am a bogey plus golfer and do not play slow, but would just rather play by my self. Especially when you end up getting put with guys that play together a on a regular basis...I just feel like an extra thumb and don't enjoy the round of golf.

[Mr. Desmond]

Heh, ok, I'm not actually friendless. But I am without local friends who play golf. My few friends who are into golf live in other states, and none of my friends here show any interest. So, until I manage to build up a group of golfing acquaintances, that leaves me to play by myself (or paired with strangers). But as a very early beginner, I don't have a lot of confidence, so playing with people I don't know isn't really exciting.

I know I need to get over it, and get out there and play as often as I can, not just when I'm visiting friends out of town. But it's easier said than done.

Were any of you in a similar situation when you started? What advice can you give me? Should I try to seek out courses that have more "casual" players? (Not even really sure how to identify those.) Go at times that I know won't be busy? (I don't think that exists around here, and I work so weekdays are out). I'm considering joining my local club, but it's expensive and I'd kind of like to wait until I'm at least slightly better before committing to that.

I moved to an area (out of love, now crashed and burned - another story), and all of my golfing buds are now >30 mi away. But I have several courses nearby, with a course and range 3 minutes away. I get on the course, and if crowded, they pair me up. I am joining their league so I can make new golfing buds and get a taste of competition.

I started again 4 years ago worse than a beginner - had terrible swing habits from poor instruction (not from lack of practice), then divorce and surgery that I allowed to put myself out of the game for 3 years My speed went from 95 to 75 after surgery. Did not know anyone in the area to trust as an instructor, having had another one that took my money. Gheez!! Tried to self-teach -- what a joke. Needed a local guy and found one who uses video and trackman. Speed up to 95+ now, swing looking 100% better after a year.

So don't feel badly about beginning -- people once laughed at my swing. When Haney's people taught me, some guy on the range said it was the worst swing he'd ever seen. What abuse and after thousands of dollars poured into instruction! So whatever you think, others have had worse abuse. I've overcome others and myself.

Thinking about the above, if I was a beginner, I'd find a course nearby with adult clinics - it's social and learning. Then find a private instructor and insist he video you, find a good range and a camera with a tripod. If you want to be decent, practice your hobby intelligently with video. Get a friend from a class and video each other's swings.

Just go out and play whether they pair you up or not. Even if you don't feel capable, all I ask of others is to keep up - play to a normal speed - efficient golf. Play ready golf. Don't spend more than 3 minutes or so looking for a ball. Don't stand over a ball. Take a practice swing, move into address, and swing. Do not get angry. Learn to laugh at yourself and then improve. Learn to read a green efficiently. Have fun with no expectations. Be a partner with a great demeanor and sense of humor. Do not dwell on poor shots, Forget them and talk about other sports and life between shots. Good luck.

[Valleygolfer]

I still find it hard to find people to play with here after 5 years, very limit selection of friends and most of them already have playing partners. When I started I played a lot of evening rounds with no one around and by myself so I would not be embarrassed by my play but no one usually cares that you suck so it was a waste of time worrying about it. So if you are like me, just play during slower times until you feel up to being in groups. I don't know if there are slower times on courses in Cali though...

[inthehole]

I would do a little research & find a par 3 or short course.   These courses typically don't attract the super serious players that can be off putting to beginners.    What I did was call the course, explained my situation & asked if they could recommend the best time when there would likely be the least amount of people on the course, so I could practice playing by myself and not hold anyone up.   Worked out great.

Best advice, don't be afraid to pick up and keep moving ... don't feel you have to keep hitting ball after ball if a hole isn't going well, especially if people are behind you waiting.

[LimeTree]

Another thing that I think would be really good for you because you can learn AND meet some people who are also likely to be beginners is at my home course ... Tijeras Creek has some beginner clinics this summer.  Here's a link:  http://tijerascreek.com/-summer-clinics

Ah, cool, I'll check that out! I actually went to Tijeras Creek for the first time a couple of weekends ago, with the intention of trying out the range, but it was so busy that there were half a dozen people standing around waiting for spots, so I left. My only hesitation with doing a clinic is that I'm trying not to get too much conflicting instruction - I find that every instructor I talk to has a different way of doing things and explaining things, which throws me off, so I'm attempting to stick with one person for a while. But this sounds like it might be casual enough that it's not a huge deal.

My thought is to make sure you can make contact on each attempted swing.  A total beginner will often whiff.

Yeah, I'm at least beyond the point where I regularly whiff. The only time it has happened recently was once when I was trying a totally different way of swinging, and once when I got distracted by the guy behind me at the range. So I make contact pretty much every time, but I still top it somewhat often, and when I do make solid contact, it usually doesn't go nearly as far as it should. I'm improving, but far from confident...

[Golfingdad]

Ah, cool, I'll check that out! I actually went to Tijeras Creek for the first time a couple of weekends ago, with the intention of trying out the range, but it was so busy that there were half a dozen people standing around waiting for spots, so I left. My only hesitation with doing a clinic is that I'm trying not to get too much conflicting instruction - I find that every instructor I talk to has a different way of doing things and explaining things, which throws me off, so I'm attempting to stick with one person for a while. But this sounds like it might be casual enough that it's not a huge deal.

Yeah, it's a few students per teacher for 45 minutes or an hour one night a week.  I would get the impression that it's geared mainly for complete beginners and will not delve too far into much technical stuff.

However, if you're already working with an instructor, then I would not advise it.  If not, I think it would be a good place to start to just get your feet wet, get comfortable making contact, comfortable out on the course, on the range, etc, meet a few nice people in the same boat that may want to brave the course with you a few times, and it probably won't be long until you're quite comfortable out there.

(Most of the time I've gone out, the range there is pretty quiet, so you might have caught them when they're hosting a tournament or when the high school kids are practicing for matches or something.)

[GHIN0011458]

Everyone had to start somewhere - and for me at least, I remember going on GolfNow and finding the cheapest round I could find. I would play crappy courses just to play. But more importantly I would practice a lot.. a ton. I would work on one small, specific thing. I used to have a HUGE slice. I am hitting 6 irons what I used to hit my 3 hybrid.. that is all over 7 years. Just practice more than you play until you can keep your ball in play.

[bkuehn1952]

Yeah, I'm at least beyond the point where I regularly whiff. The only time it has happened recently was once when I was trying a totally different way of swinging, and once when I got distracted by the guy behind me at the range. So I make contact pretty much every time, but I still top it somewhat often, and when I do make solid contact, it usually doesn't go nearly as far as it should. I'm improving, but far from confident...

"Topping" happens to everyone.  It sounds to me like you are ready to join other groups.  Starting out at Par 3 and Executive courses is a nice way to ease your way into full length golf courses.  I did that when I first took up the game.  Go out and have fun.

[colin007]

Lol I topped it twice last time I played. Happens to lots of people.

[Lihu]

Lol I topped it twice last time I played. Happens to lots of people.

and shanks happen to the other half. . .

[LimeTree]

and shanks happen to the other half. . .

Oh. I wasn't aware I supposed to choose one or the other...

[Lihu]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lihu

and shanks happen to the other half. . .

Oh. I wasn't aware I supposed to choose one or the other...

Sure, just ask your instructor, he'll give you an assortment of mishits from which to choose. . .

[Club Rat]

When you become really good, you can do both with one swing

Only the best can "whiff, top and shank" on any given swing.

Believe me, I spent years mastering them all.

Club Rat

[rcwkent]

I've met almost all the guys I regularly play with on a 1st tee somewhere.

Be a good playing partner:    tend the flag, help look for another's ball, compliment good shots,

laugh at yourself , keep up with the group (pick up when necessary), don't give advice, buy

the first round from the cart girl, suggest post-round cocktail, ask about other's games, clubs, etc.

I took some group lessons and found my current pro in one....also met a couple guys to play with.

Everyone is afraid to play with strangers....but once you get better you will still experience this fear

when you're teeing off with the first group in a tourney with 20 guys watching!

[Club Rat]

Everyone is afraid to play with strangers....but once you get better you will still experience this fear

when you're teeing off with the first group in a tourney with 20 guys watching!

Also, beware of "The Gallery from Hell"

Nothing will cause your cookies to tighten when there's guy's drinking all afternoon on the deck overlooking the 18th hole yelling and hounding players as they try to hit a 7 iron to a tight tucked pin over a pond, with bunkers surrounding then green.

If your successful, you'll get a much appreciated roar...

If you fail, you'll feel the pain...

Club Rat

[RH31]

Heh, ok, I'm not actually friendless. But I am without local friends who play golf. My few friends who are into golf live in other states, and none of my friends here show any interest. So, until I manage to build up a group of golfing acquaintances, that leaves me to play by myself (or paired with strangers). But as a very early beginner, I don't have a lot of confidence, so playing with people I don't know isn't really exciting.

I know I need to get over it, and get out there and play as often as I can, not just when I'm visiting friends out of town. But it's easier said than done.

Were any of you in a similar situation when you started? What advice can you give me? Should I try to seek out courses that have more "casual" players? (Not even really sure how to identify those.) Go at times that I know won't be busy? (I don't think that exists around here, and I work so weekdays are out). I'm considering joining my local club, but it's expensive and I'd kind of like to wait until I'm at least slightly better before committing to that.

I'd join the local club. There will be much more "slow" time at the private course when you can get out on the course and work on your game.

When I first started, 30 years ago, I played a lot of golf by myself on weeknights and weekend afternoons. Eventually, I met a lot of the folks that I still golf with.

[dfreuter415]

Heh, ok, I'm not actually friendless. But I am without local friends who play golf. My few friends who are into golf live in other states, and none of my friends here show any interest. Were any of you in a similar situation when you started? What advice can you give me?

There have been some terrific suggestions here. My wife began playing after our daughters were out of high school and was in a similar situation as yourself. Here is what she did...

1) Bought a medium priced set of matched clubs. (Later I upgraded her clubs when she became committed to the game.)

2) Took group lessons from a local teacher. (Later she took private lessons from the same teacher.)

3) Found a small golf league at a local municipal course.

She is hooked now and we go out with other golfing couples and have a great time. She also got her sister to play, and on weekends we play 9 holes and have dinner.